The 100th
by Thecricketsarecalling
Summary: In a different series of events we follow Quinn and Joe over the course of several years falling in love, losing a child, and battling sickness.
1. Joe and Quinn

**2018**

This was the most excruciating pain Joe had felt yet. Doubled over in his hospital bed, he clutched the plastic kidney dish the nurse had given him, and gagged as acid tasting vomit projected from his sore throat, and spraying downward. It was humiliating, as well as gross, and uncomfortable. His stomach lurched, gurgling, as he gagged as hated that another mouthful of vomit came up. Fearing the kidney dish might overflow, he tried to slow himself down, but Nancy, his daytime nurse came over and just like a magician, switched the dishes smoothly without even hesitating. Holding a fresh empty dish, Joe blinked up at Nancy, eyes watering with pure exhaustion. He had been raised to be polite, and wanted to thank her, but another awful wave of nausea spun around him, as he leaned down, gave. a dry heave, before enough splatter of vomit came up. Feeling as if he had voided everything, he sat there, slightly hunched over the dish before finally Nancy's comforting hand patted on his back of the T-shirt he was wearing.

Nancy, along with several other nurses had been looking after Joe for the past few months. Some had worked downstairs at the clinic, others like Nancy worked up here and reminded him much like his mother. All ranging from their early twenties, to being middle aged. All beyond comforting, sweet, and there for him despite how embarrassing times like this were. Still, every night he prayed thanking God for all of these wonderful doctors, nurses, and orderlies that had been taking such great care of him.

He knew it wasn't always the easiest way to get through bad days like this, but prayer had honestly helped him from spiraling into a deep dark depression knowing very well that by this time next year...he would be gone.

He had made peace with these facts but he knew his loved ones were struggling with this. At age twenty-three when he was supposed to have his whole life ahead of him, he had been sat down a few months ago and Dr. Green, his doctor who had been treating him since the very beginning had simply sighed, and without tiptoeing around it, he simply sighed, shook his head and said the treatments hadn't worked. That the cancer had spread, and even if they tried another course of treatment, it might buy him an extra month or two tops. Joe remembered vividly this morning. How he sat back speechless, feeling as if somebody had thrown a bucket of ice cold water over him. He remembered the shouts right beside, and how quickly things became heated as shouts, cries, and even accusing swears being shouted before finally Joe hung his head down, before gathering the person sitting beside him in his arms, squeezing him tight, feeling the struggles against his arms as they swore, trying their hardest to pull away, before finally they gave up, and began sobbing against him.

This was a sad harsh reality that despite the treatments, medication, and prayers simply didn't mean anything. He was dying. Now here he was, his once signature dreads cut off once his hair had begun to thin at the beginning of his treatments. Now his hair was cut short, the style wavy, and thinning. He still remembered when Sam and Blaine visited shortly after he had that done, and how amusing their stunned expressions were by their widening eyes. Blaine reassured him that it looked wonderful. That it looked clean and healthy. Sam meanwhile, honest and naive as always, just kept staring that it looked different.

No in a bad way...just different. Nancy handed him a small paper cup of water.

"Rinse and spit honey."

She said as he took the paper cup and swooshed the water in, before spitting in the same plastic dish that Nancy took away, before handing him a small lifesaver mint. These are truly been a huge help. A horrible side affect to his treatment were developing painful sores in the inside of his mouth. He found himself constantly sucking on these mints to settle his stomach, and usually they helped with his breath after he threw up countless times. Smiling gratefully at Nancy he thanked her before popping the mint in his mouth.

"You're wife just got in, you wanna see her?"

Nancy asked as she took care of the plastic dish he just gave her. Smiling weakly, he nodded.

"Yeah...that would be great."

Nancy smiled leaving the room. Sitting there, Joe sighed, reaching over to the side table and took a sip of water. He figured he might chew on some ice chips to try and settle his stomach. Pressing the button on the hospital bed to go into a sitting position. Just then, his wife of the past five years walked in. She was slightly flushed, her blond nearly white hair styled in a loose messy ponytail, showing her beautiful clear face. She wore light jeans, and a button down white blouse, her giant bag thrown over her shoulder as she hurried in. Instantly the second she saw him, she raised an eyebrow.

"What's wrong?!"

She hurried over, dumping her massive bag into a chair that sat on one side of the hospital bed as she hurried over, closely staring at him with suspicious eyes. Faintly he could spell her perfume, peaches. It was her signature scent, and it drove him absolutely wild. Today with the thin sunlight spilling in through the hospital window, she looks absolutely stunning. After all this time being with her, she still made his heart hammer in his chest like the first time he laid eyes on her all those years ago back at school. Joe tried to fake a smile and shrug, hoping the mint he had in his mouth was masking the smell of vomit. Still, his wife narrowed her eyes, closely staring at him before she reached and felt his forehead.

"You feel warm..."

"I'm fine, how was traffic?"

He tried to switch the subject, before she sighed, looking displeased before she sat herself down on the edge of his bed.

"Were you unable to keep breakfast down? I can get you a protein shake..."

Joe smirked and shook his head.

"I'm fine baby, honest. Now Rachel texted me, she said she's going to be visiting next week and wants to get together with you..."

His wife's eyes went down to Joe's lips.

"Joe..."

Before he could say another word, his wife leaned down and wiped his lips with her thin finger, the sunlight catching her diamond ring, sending small rays of light against their faces as she sighed, brow wrinkling as she brought up her hand and stared down.

Blood. It wasn't a lot, but enough. It usually happened when he strained himself after throwing up, or when the sores in his mouth were flaring up. He saw her staring at it, and instantly his heart broke. He hated being the reason why she looked like this. It was the same heartbroken devastated look he saw in her eyes when the doctor announced that he was in fact dying, and now all they could do was make sure he was comfortable. The same look whenever he had bad days, and she seemed absolutely terrified.

The same look in her eyes when they lost their little boy less than two years ago.

"Quinn...it's nothing..."

Quinn continued staring down at the blood, before she sighed, grabbing a tissue from the same table that held his water, and wiped the blood away. Joe knowing he needed to think fast, sat up straighter, before shrugging.

"Probably just a sore in my mouth, just gotta drink some water..."

He reached and took his cup, sipping it. Quinn closely watched him, before he put the cup down, and loudly smacked his lips to get her to smile.

"See? All better."

He stared at her, before Quinn cracked a small smile, something she seemed to be doing less and less of lately. Smiling himself, he lifted her tiny hand, and kissed her knuckles, making her giggle. It was bad enough she had lost a child all ready at this age, but even worse he would make her a widow by the end of the year.

Together in silence, they continued staring at each other as thin sunlight continued to drift in through the window.


	2. Tattoos

**Present**

Quinn sat in the most comfortable chair in the hospital room which had slowly become like a second home for the two of them over the last few months. She had scooted the chair closer to the bed, and had her feet up on Joe's bed. She had her Mac open and was typing away. It seemed as though every waking moment she was looking up new kinds of therapy, all natural. Just a few months back Joe had put his foot down, and kept it down when she tried convincing him that there was this new cutting edge clinic in Europe that were experimenting with new treatments. As hard as this was, Joe simply squeezed her hands, and looked her right in the eye. He told her that whatever time he had left, he wanted to spend it with her here. He had fought long enough, and didn't want to spend his last few months drugged out of his mind, living overseas. He had made peace with what was happening, and due to his beliefs, he didn't want to keep lying to himself over what was happening. He was dying, plain and simple. This resulted in many tear filled fights. Quinn accused him of giving up, of abandoning her, letting her be a widow at age twenty-five after she had all ready lost so much. This argument lasted weeks, until finally one night he wiped her tear streaked face as she sniffled, completely defeated. The fights started off with her pacing, pulling at her hair, shouting and screaming at him. Finally this one certain night, Joe was doubled over, sitting up in bed, having just vomited blood, tiny strands of beaded blood dribbling down between his two full parted lips. Quinn became hysterical, calling for the nurse, her hands flapping in panic like two tiny little birds as the nurse came in to help clean him up.

That's when the tears started. Once the nurse left, Quinn began apologizing, telling him she was sorry, as if she was the cause for upsetting him and making this happen. Sitting across from him, she had finally hit a brick wall. She had been beyond exhausted, drained, and emotionally at her very end. He knew this had been so much for her. The late night emergency room visits, the doctor appointments, watching as he received painful injections and treatments. Watching her handsome, strong, kind, and caring husband start to quickly drop weight, and become a weak empty shell of his former self. This had been going on for years now, and after losing the baby, this had finally been it. Reaching across, he squeezed her hands, his hospital bracelets along with his others jingling that he had collected over the years. He grasped her hands and held him as tightly as he could.

Quinn suddenly looked so much younger than she really was. Suddenly she looked like a frightened little girl. He had only seen her cry like this twice before. Once after they lost their little boy, and the second when he was diagnosed.

"Quinn, look at me."

Quinn bowed her head ashamed, before finally she sniffled loudly and looked up. Joe started at her, his eyes serious.

"Listen to me, I've spent enough time being angry over what happened. I know this is testing your fate and believe me...it's testing mine. I'm furious that I won't live long enough to grow old with you...I'm furious I'm leaving you alone and I'll just be you're first husband that died young..."

Quinn shook her head, tears still slipping down her face.

"I'll never remarry..."

Joe gave her hands another gentle squeeze.

"Don't you dare say that. Your life isn't over after I'm gone. You are so beautiful, so smart, so talented...you have your whole life ahead of you and I hope it gives you a little sound of mind knowing I'll be looking in on you from time to time. You're a fighter Quinn...ever since you had Beth you've proved that you're much stronger than you think. I refuse to believe you're going to give up. You made me the happiest man ever. I feel like an actual angel appeared before men all those years ago...and it was our density that we were meant to be together."

"I'm a horrible person..."

Joe shook his head.

"No, you're saved my life in more ways I can even count."

"Yeah sure...as you lay here dying..."

"It's because it's my time. I can say...that in this short time I was on Earth I met my soulmate, had a beautiful son who's waiting for me in Heaven. I'm so grateful for every single second we shared together. You made me so happy Quinn, and after I'm gone you need to keep going. You need to keep believing, and know I'm in a better place with our little boy. We'll be watching...and you better meet someone wonderful, have lots of babies, keep using that beautiful voice of yours, and keep working on being the best version of yourself."

Quinn hung her head down, chest heaving, before Joe leaned forward, gently kissing her forehead. Since then, there hadn't been any more fights. Joe knew how badly she was taking this, and hid behind a wall of keeping strong for him, doing research, and being his voice to the doctors, demanding answers. He knew she had thrown herself into keeping busy, not allowing enough time for the reality of what was happening to truly set in. She currently was sitting, typing away on her laptop, her feet up on the bed, as Joe sat up, his hospital positioned upward. The nurse had just come in and gave him his pain medication in his IV. It had just started going to his head, and he sat back, blankly looking up at the TV mounted on the wall, which was playing the news. Just then Nancy, his nurse came in, checking his IV bag.

"How you feeling sweet pea?"

Joe blinked, feeling all ready soupy from the medication.

"Better now beautiful."

Nancy rolled her eyes, playfully swatting his arm, causing him to crack up. As she turned over his hand, she checked where his IVs were, making sure the bandages were fresh and wrapped just tight enough. Smirking, she looked at his tattoos.

"Boy, these tattoos are something else..."

Joe laughed as she lifted his arm, looking them over. Despite the fact she had seen his tattoos countless times, she still seemed fascinated by them.

"Which one is your favorite?"

Joe smirked and held up his left hand, showing the tattoo wrapped around his ring finger. Instead of wearing a ring, he had Quinn's name tattooed and wrapped around her finger. Squinting, Nancy smiled, actually reading what this said for the first time.

"Isn't that sweet. You got any honey?"

She turned towards Quinn who was still sitting up on her laptop. Raising an eyebrow, Quinn looked up.

"Well, I had one removed..."

Joe smirked, knowing exactly what she was talking about. The iconic Ryan Seacrest tattoo during her teenage breakdown. She got it layered off, and covered up with several roses instead shortly before things started up with Joe. Since then, she got two more. Smirking, she shut her laptop, actually liking Nancy, and how sweet she was to Joe, mostly whenever he started getting a little loopy on his meds. Sliding her laptop into her bag, she lifted her blouse partly, showing the name Jospeh in beautiful script over her ribs. Nancy smiled looking at it.

"Isn't that just the sweetest?! Plus look at you! So thin! Ah to be young!"

Quinn chuckled, glancing over at Joe who smiled, as Quinn started to let her blouse drop. Nancy glanced down for just a mere second and pointed.

"What about that one?"

Quinn instantly knew what he was talking about and felt her heart drop. Instead, she sighed and glanced down. On her other side was written her son's name.

Nash.

"Um, that was our son's name."

Nancy's face dropped, embarrassed.

"Oh, I'm sorry honey...I shouldn't..."

Quinn fixed her blouse and shook her head, forcing a smile.

"Don't be. I got it about a year back...made me feel better."

"Do you mind me asking his name?"

Joe sadly smiled and spoke.

"Nash. Nash Hart."

Nancy sighed.

"That's a wonderful name. I lost a daughter, crib death...God that was nearly fifteen years ago. I think it only made it a little easier because my husband and I all ready had four other children. Still, breaks my heart to see that sort of thing happen to young kids like yourself."

Quinn sadly nodded.

"He...was stillborn. I delivered him. He had a cyst in his kidney..."

Her words trailed off, clearly struggling to talk about this. Joe had tried to bring her to a support group a few times, but in the end Quinn figured this just wasn't for her. Nancy sighed, before walking over and gave her a gentle kiss on the top of her head. Quinn was grateful. As good as her relationship was with her mother now, she never quite felt as close as she should have after the whole Beth thing and her father blowing up on her ending their bond together. He had shown his face only twice since then, and both times weren't exactly pleasant. Quinn knew if it hadn't been for Joe she honestly would have ripped his face off. Instead, she was shown so much comfort and kindness by this one woman in the last year.

She saw how sweet she was with Joe, and perfectly understood the pain they were going through. In fact, the whole reason why she went back to nursing school was because she lost her teenage daughter to breast cancer almost ten years ago. Joe had remarked that sometimes when the pain was extremely bad and he couldn't sleep, Nancy would sit up with him, helping him pass the time. She would either pray with him, read, or simply talk about her family. She had said more than once that Joe and Quinn were the most adorable couple she had ever laid eyes on and felt as if it was a complete pleasure being able to care for Joe and get to know his cute little wife.

Quinn knew that Nancy had heard abut Nash, but at this exact moment there wasn't any uncomfortable silence, or fake tears. Instead, she gave her a warm comforting smile and rubbed her arm.

"Tonight when I say my prayers for my daughters Bella, and Gina I'll say one for your boy Nash. Such a handsome name."

Quinn smiled up at her, before Nancy turned and told Joe she needed to start her rounds but she would be back soon with ice chips. With that, the two were left alone. Quinn smiled looking at her husband, before she got up, scooting the chair back.

"She's so sweet..."

"Yeah she is. I was thinking maybe we could surprise here with flowers since Valentine's Day is coming up. I have her address, sorta as a thank you for everything..."

"That sounds sweet, sure."

Quinn carefully crawled into the narrow bed, hating how thin her husband felt as she slipped her arms around him. On Joe's left bicep he had gotten the date Nash had been born tattooed beneath the outline of a cross. The very thought of that day still haunted Quinn, and she knew it was only a matter of time that everything would come to surface again. She suspected it might blow up when the time finally came that Joe was no longer here to help her push away those horrible memories. Still, she figured she would maybe bring this up now while the meds were working their magic.

"So..."

She said, laying beside him, gently tracing his arm tattoos with her pink painted fingernail.

"Have you thought about it anymore?"

Joe, who was clearly stoned on his meds, nuzzled up against her, wearing a loose fitting T-shirt and sweats.

"Hum?"

"You know, saving...some of your sperm."

She was careful with her words, knowing very well despite how strong the meds were what Joe's reaction would be. Closing his eyes he sighed.

"Quinn..."

Quinn tried to stay calm as she shrugged.

"Listen, this is me actually thinking about the future. I'm not being dramatic or shouting. I just think it might be a good idea. We can donate it to the clinic, it doesn't cost much to keep it there...and maybe...further down the line when I want to maybe try and have another baby..."

"You can do that with your new husband, or boyfriend...or whatever guy is lucky enough to be with you. You're still young Quinn why are you thinking about this?"

Quinn tried to control her breathing, refusing to cry. Instead, she stared at his T-shirt and played with a tiny string that had come undone on the material. Trying to focus, she knew this wouldn't be easy.

"Because...if what you're saying is true...and I'll be alone soon...I want...some part of you still with me. Is that too much to ask?"


	3. No heartbeat

"Quinn..."

Joe tried to say but Quinn shook her head, showing that same stubborn attitude he had fallen in love with all those years ago when he first laid eyes on her when he first met her durning the "God Squad" meeting on his first day at McKinley all those years ago. He remembered seeing her, sitting across the room from her, hands folded, looking absolutely beautiful. When the meeting was over, he walked out with her, smelling her sweet perfume and couldn't believe somebody could be this pretty. She introduced herself properly, and the moment her smooth tiny hand slipped into his to shake, he felt his heart skip a beat within his chest. He had never had a girlfriend before, let alone even have a crush. Sure there were some really pretty girls at his church, but this was the first girl around his age that reminded him of those models in the magazines at his doctor's office.

She was absolutely perfect in everyday. She had hazel colored eyes which looked a light green when the light caught them just right. Her hair was pure blond, her skin flawless, smooth, and absolutely gorgeous. She wore light lipgloss, and Joe couldn't believe when his eyes drifted down to her breast for just a fraction of a second as they walked to their lockers that just so happened to be almost right next to each other. She was talking about the Valentine's Day singing idea, and mentioned that she could lend him her iPod if he needed to listen to any of the songs that were requested in case he didn't know them. Feeling his cheeks burn, he thanked her surprised that she wasn't treating him any differently after finding out he had been homeschooled, and lived a very sheltered life.

"Do you have a phone?"

Joe blinked, feeling hypnotized, hoping she hadn't noticed him glancing at her breasts. These tingling strange feelings made him feel numb, and his tongue oversized as he stuttered.

"Um..."

"Phone? Do you have one?"

Joe understood, hating how stupid he sounded.

"Oh, yeah. I just got one. My mom insisted since I started school...I just got it yesterday. I barley know how to work it."

He slipped out his iPhone. His parents had gotten themselves ones as well and started a family plan. His parents weren't strict with their beliefs, and always allowed Joe to make his choices as long as he was honest with them as well as himself. They got him the phone, claiming they originally wanted to get him one for emergencies, but understood a teenage boy starting school outta have one, especially if he wanted to start making friends. It was an older model phone, and last night Joe attempted to mess around with it, really having no idea what he was doing. Pulling it out he smirked, feeling a little embarrassed.

"I just got it, I know I gotta get a case..."

"Oh wow, this is perfect. You have study hall last period right?"

"Yeah three times a week..."

Joe said mentally trying to remember his schedule. Quinn smiled, taking the phone.

"Cool, I'll meet you in the library and I'll help you download iTunes and download some songs with you...and I'll put my number in and text you..."

Joe stood back watching, both amused, as well as confused as she finished typing in her number. Just then she giggled, lighting up her entire face as she scooted over and leaned against Joe, catching him completely off guard as she leaned against him, putting her arm around him. Suddenly feeling as if he boiling, he stood back stiff, as Quinn smiled and leaned against him holding the phone up. Smirking, Joe looked up as Quinn smiled and snapped . their photo. Turning, she typed something else into the phone and handed it back to him.

"Here, first contact, and first photo..."

Joe looked down as he saw that their photo of them together was now her contact photo. Staring at it, he smirked, unable to believe how good they looked. This was his first photo besides with family members that he took with a girl. Not just any girl, an angel. Smiling, he stood back before lifting his own hazel eyes and locking them with hers.

"Thanks..."

"I'll see you at the library later, text me!"

Turning, she carried her books and walked away into the crowd. Leaning against the lockers, he lifted his phone and stared down at their photo having absolutely no idea that this was a photo of himself and his future wife...

That same photo printed out, now over seven years old was framed, along with four others, all in tiny frames all the nightstand table near the room's telephone, and a potted plant Quinn had brought in, insisting that she looked up which plants gave off vitamins in the air. She constantly watered it, and was proud that it had just begun to blossom. The other photos were of when they won Nationals in Chicago when they had just started dating. The other two were on their wedding day, taken with Joe's parents, and Quinn's mom. The last was of Quinn, on their honeymoon. She was sitting on the beach, wearing a huge sunhat, sunglasses lowered, laughing completely taken off guard when Joe snapped the photo. These were all his favorites, and Quinn had framed them all, bringing them into the hospital room tome it seem more like "home". Joe sighed, hating that once again they were clashing over the subject of Joe freezing some of his sperm for Quinn. He knew she desperately wanted a baby, that shortly after Nash she had fallen into a depression, that's when a month or so later she told him she wanted to start trying again. Joe knew she wasn't thinking clearly, and needed time to heal both physically and mentally.

This resulted in more arguments, the worst being when he discovered she was trying to get pregnant behind her back. Before they could fully talk things over, Joe got sick and since then they hadn't had a chance to look back. She had brought up the idea of him freezing his sperm just a few months ago back when the idea of maybe starting up another round of radiation and chemo might be a possibility. This could result in him becoming sterile. The doctor brought up this option, and Quinn jumped at this idea. Joe meanwhile wasn't so sure. He wanted nothing more than to give Quinn a baby, but after the doctors made it clear anymore treatment wouldn't be be an option. That he was in fact dying. The very idea of leaving Quinn alone terrified him. What he wanted after facing the facts that he was in fact dying was that he wanted Quinn to someday move on.

He wanted her to meet someone who treated her like the way she deserved to be treated. A nice guy who loved her, and worshiped her. A guy who would give her a family someday, and give her a future. He wasn't thrilled with the idea of being known as her first husband who died young. He didn't want to be forgotten, but knew Quinn had her whole life ahead of her. She didn't need to be a young single mother. She deserved a fresh start. Still, he couldn't quite get through to her.

"Quinn, I love you more than anything...but I want you to eventually move on and meet some wonderful guy, start a family...and be happy."

"And what? Forget about you and Nash?"

Joe sighed, hating that he was upsetting her.

"No baby, I know you'll never forget either of us. You'll carry us in your heart forever."

Quinn glared.

"No...this marriage is a partnership. I'm not giving up on you until it's officially over. You never gave up on me...but I want this. Who knows, maybe I'll never use it. Maybe like you said I'll meet some wonderful guy and have ten million babies, and live happily ever after...but think Joe what if it was the other way around?"

"What?!"

"No, think about it. I remember how upset you were when I got into that accident...you think I don't remember? Try and think what if I was the one who was sick? What if...there was a chance you could have my eggs frozen? Wouldn't you want a surrogate to have our baby?"

"Quinn..."

"Be honest? Trust me, I would want you to someday meet some wonderful woman and have your babies...I would want you to have a future, but I still think that could be possible even if you had the option to have another child with me, even if I was gone. You would want part of me with you..."

"You know you would always be with me..."

Quinn shook her head.

"I know...we'll always be with each other, and we believe it doesn't end here...and trust me, I feel a whole lot better knowing you'll be up there on my side looking out for me...but...I want to at least have the option. I still have nightmares about us losing Nash. We were cheated out of having our little boy, and now I'm being cheated out of spending the rest of my life with my soulmate."

"But it's God's..."

Quinn shook her head, gently pressing her finger against his lips. Sadly smiling, she cocked her head to the side.

"Just think it over, it would mean the world...I know you've done so much all ready for me, but let me have this one thing. Okay?"

Joe sighed, staring at her, before he nodded, still feeling unsure. Smiling, Quinn leaned forward, pressing her forehead against his. It was their thing they did together. It started years ago, and now this was their way of saying "I love you." without even so much as saying a single word.

**Later...**

_Quinn remembered laying on the examining table, her large pregnant perfectly round stomach revealed after changing into a paper hospital gown. The nurse allowed her to wear her leggings beneath it, and had her lay back. It honestly just seemed like yesterday that she was a scared young teenager getting her ultrasounds done for Beth. She couldn't believe all of that had happened during her teens years. She was happy that Beth was with Shelby, a stable happy home in New York. Puck was now in the air force, and every once in awhile texted her to check in. She had visited Beth several times since the adoption had been officially made final. It took awhile for her to truly see the stupid mistakes she had made, and in the end she figured she wasn't ready to be a mother, nor be able to give Beth the life she deserved. Shelby allowed her to be part of her life, being open and honest that Quinn was her birth mother. Still, Quinn didn't want to confuse her, and had visited her in New York a few times with Joe. She remembered originally being scared telling Joe the truth about Beth, but he had listened and had been supportive throughout it all. She remembered them visiting shortly after marrying, and how Joe sprawled out on Shelby's living room floor playing Barbies with Beth who giggled, and absolutely adored him. Sitting in the other room sipping tea with Shelby, both laughed watching them from the kitchen, talking about school, work, and how married life was treating Quinn. Shelby was currently dating an art director who loved Beth, and for the first time in forever their words ran smoothy, there no longer anymore tension hanging in the air between them. Quinn and Joe had started a small savings account for Beth's college fund. At first Shelby said there was no need, but Quinn insisted. It was the least she could do. _

_"So now that you're married? When do you think you'll be trying to make Beth a little brother and sister?"_

_Quinn blushed, staring in at Joe who was propped up on his below, making Beth's Barbie dance as she giggled behind her tiny little hands, fascinated by the funny voices he used, as well as his cool "snake" hair. Watching him, she knew they hadn't really had the talk yet about children, but just by watching him with Beth, she knew two things were for certain. One was that Joe would make an amazing father. The second, she would absolutely love to start a family with him. Now after all this time, here she was. She was nine months pregnant, uncomfortable, and less than a week away from her due date. This pregnancy somehow had been different than what it was like when she carried Beth. _

_She figure it was because she was a little bit older. She was married, in love, and content with where she was in life. This baby had been planned, and she honestly had loved every single waking moment of it. It also didn't hurt that Joe was constantly remarking on how beautiful she was. She still remembered the look of complete surprise as his eyes widened, and his jaw dropped a few months back when they learned she was carrying a little boy. Joe was unable to make it to this appointment since he was interning at the high school, going for his teaching degree, wanting to start teaching religion. He was interning, and tried everything he could to move his times around but was unable to. Instead Quinn reassured him this was just a routine ultrasound to see when she could go in closer to her due date. She promised to call him as soon as she left._

_That morning had been perfectly normal like every other morning... Still, she should have known something was wrong. Especially the night before when she was drinking a glass of apple juice before bed, and Joe felt her stomach, usually loving how much their baby gave a series of fluttering kicks within her whenever he felt the curve of her stomach. It was a silly little trick both learned that the baby would always kick like crazy after she gulped down something. Last night, he felt her stomach sitting beside her on the sofa, and instead nothing. She remembered him raising an eyebrow, gently pressing his palm against her stomach waiting, before he gave a puzzled expression and leaned down pressing his ear against her stomach listening._

_"Hey buddy, what's going on?"_

_Quinn, who had been extremely turned on durning this stage in her pregnancy giggled, before she gently ran her hands down the back of Joe's T-shirt._

_"He's sleeping..." _

_She whispered, before reaching down and tilting his head up. The two began to kiss, having absolutely no idea this perfect little life they planned was all ready destroyed. Quinn remembered her doctor, Dr. Weathers coming in, chatting with her, being friendly as ever before telling her she would have her nurse start the ultrasound as she went to grab her file. Opening her hospital gown, she stared at her massive stomach, smiling as the friendly nurse entered, and squirted cool gel against her stomach, before rolling over the monitor, and taking the paddle._

_"So, got any names picked out?" Quinn smiled turning towards the screen slightly._

_"Yeah, actually Nash...Nash Jospeh Hart."_

_"That's such a cool name! Is this you're first?"_

_Quinn usually hesitated at this question, but figured it couldn't hurt. _

_"No, he has a big sister Beth." _

_"Well, both have great names, now just relax you might feel some pressure..."_

_Quinn took a deep breath as the paddle was pressed against her stomach. She saw the outline of the baby on the monitor and smiled. She mentally noted that she would get a print out and give it to Joe as a surprise when she picked him up later. Laying there, hands behind her head, she smiled when the nurse grinned. _

_"He's going to be long..."_

_"Yeah my husband is tall..."_

_Just then the nurse flipped a switch, and a strange buzzing noise filled the air. Something Quinn had never heard before. Instantly she saw the nurse raise an eyebrow before she pressed the paddle in slightly harder. The buzzing continued. The nurse's face said it all, and a strange fluttering filled Quinn's chest. Usually when this switch was flipped she could hear the steady drumbeat of the baby's heart. Instead this was different. The nurse raised an eyebrow._

_"Hum..."_

_"What's wrong?"_

_The nurse blinked, faking a smile before shaking her head._

_"I think something is wrong with this machine, let me get the doctor..."_

_Quinn sat up slightly._

_"Is everything okay?"_

_"Of course, just hold on one second honey..."_

_The nurse quickly left, and moments later Dr. Weathers walked in smiling. _

_"I hear the equipment is giving you some trouble, hold on..." _

_Quinn gave a sigh of relief as Dr. Weathers took the paddle, and moved it over Quinn's swollen stomach. She stared at the screen, before she gave the same puzzled expression. With that, she flipped the switch and waited. The same hollow buzzing sound echoed in the room. Quinn laid there suddenly wishing more than ever that Joe was with her._

_Laying back, she waited before gulping and nervously laughed. _

_"What's wrong?"_

_The nurse exchanged a look with Dr. Weathers, before Dr. Weathers leaned in and whispered something Quinn couldn't quite hear. Feeling panic begin to build, she sat back waiting before the nurse opened the closet, and rolled out another ultrasound machine. Watching, Quinn blinked as Dr. Weathers shut off the first machine, and rolled over the new one positioning it. Squirting new gel on her stomach, she flipped on the machine and Quinn suddenly felt on edge and ready to snap._

_"Everything okay?"_

_Dr. Weathers gave a fake smile and nodded._

_"Of course, just lay still..."_

_The screen flickered on, and Quinn saw her baby on the screen. Breathing a sigh of relief, she stared at it, before the switch was flipped and that same hollow noise filled the air. The doctor sighed, moving the paddle from side to side before dropping her eyes. The nurse sighed, no longer able to look at Quinn. That's when that same frightened panic began to hammer deep in her chest. Staring up at them, she was ready to scream._

_"What is it?!"_

_Dr. Weathers, her same doctor throughout this same pregnancy, the same doctor who confirmed the news of the pregnancy nearly eight months ago to a thrilled Quinn and Joe now stared at her as if she was about to say something awful. She sighed, putting the paddle down and gently closing Quinn's gown, the gel still smeared her on stomach. _

_"I'm so sorry Quinn...but your baby doesn't have a heartbeat."_

_Quinn felt as if the entire world froze. She laid there for a second before blinking. _

_"What?"_

_No, this wasn't happening. She was joking. This had to be some kind of sick joke. Dr. Weathers sighed and shook her head. _

_"I triple checked...your baby is dead. I'm so sorry Quinn."_

_Quinn felt panic filled tears begin to flow, she was frightened and angry. Shaking her head she refused to believe it. _

_"No, no no! He's fine! He's alive! I felt him move...he's fine just give him a second he's asleep! I swear it, he's asleep!"_

_Dr. Weathers sighed, looking heartbroken. _

_"I'm so sorry Quinn..." "No...he's alive. Just give him a second..."_

_Quinn firmly placed her hands on her stomach, tears of frustration spilling down her face._

_"Come on baby, wake up...come on!"_

_Dr. Weathers sighed placing her hand on her arm gently._

_"I can call Joe..." _

_Quinn stared up, suddenly feeling like a frightened little girl. No, this wasn't possible...her baby was alive she knew it..._

Quinn snapped awake with a jolt. She blinked, eyes wide finding herself laying beside Joe who was fast asleep due to his pain medication.

Laying there, heart hammering in her chest, she looked down at her flat stomach and suddenly the grief from all that time ago came crashing back. Lip quivering, she gently put her arms around her dying husband and laid her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat.


	4. It's not a sin to look

**Present **

Quinn sat Indian style on Joe's hospital bed, she had forced him to eat a little lunch to help cushion the meds he had taken earlier. Watching him take his afternoon medication, all pills she had memorized by heart, as he tossed back the tiny paper cup filled to the brim with them along with drinking some water, before he nodded having swallowed all of them. Quinn smirked, hating seeing him have to take so many pills, but she knew they helped him. Staring at him, she knew she could never say it aloud, but she missed his signature dreads that he had sported for most of their relationship. Since he cut them, he wore his hair a little longer past his ears, swooped back, and straighter than she thought it would be. She knew it was thinning, and more times than she could count while lovingly stroking his hair, did she find handfuls of it falling out without him even noticing. Seeing it now at this new length and style, she saw how much darker it looked, causing his hazel eyes to appear greener than usual. Since he began treatment his earrings, and nose rings had since been removed and had closed.

Staring at him, she remembered a certain night years ago when they had all arrived there for Nationals in Chicago. Joe and her had officially begun dating just a few weeks before right when Prom happened, and she was able to prove to everyone that she would be walking by the time she graduated. Prom itself had been a whole mess, but afterwards was when Joe and her finally stopped wasting time, and confessed that they did in fact want to try and give whatever this was a go despite the fact she would be leaving for Yale in a few months. Since then Quinn had been floating on cloud nine. She had never been in a relationship like this before. Finn, Sam, Hell even Puck couldn't hold a candle to Joe. Somehow this was different. She felt perhaps it was because everything for him was a series of "firsts" due to his sheltered homeschooled life. This made things somehow more innocent, and never before out of all the guys she dated did she actually feel excited and giddy whenever he was around. She knew people were talking, and for the first time in forever she didn't care.

The night of prom she had given Joe his first kiss, and somehow as gray as a lot of their relationship was, she knew his faith would always take the front seat, and somehow for Quinn she simply didn't care. Joe's faith and passion over his religion made her fall for him even harder. When she admitted months ago about Puck and her and Beth, never once did he bat an eyelash or judge. Instead he listened and was supportive, even surprising her when he asked if she had any photos of her daughter? Surprised, Quinn blinked before showing him a few on her phone. Joe stared down, his long hair hanging down before he smirked.

"She's beautiful, just like her mother."

Quinn blushed unable to help it. Now this was their first night in Chicago. The bus ride had only taken a few hours, and after the first rest-stop break, she had switched seats and sat next to Joe. Smiling, she asked if he wanted to listen to some music? Smiling, Joe said of course, and she showed him her phone. She knew it was cheesy, but ever since they first exchanged numbers this past winter, she had made it a habit in making playlists for him. Showing him the title to her latest playlist it read...

**Joe and Quinn's National Road-trip Tunes!**

Joe laughed as she put one of her earbuds into his ear, and pressed play, always loving his reaction to listening to her latest choices for songs. Resting her head against his shoulder, she loved the scent of him. It was a mixture between his hair oil, and whatever soap he used which smelled clean and refreshing. She laid her head there, smiling feeling completely content before she felt his arm slip around her. Feeling safe and secure, she knew sitting on a bus with all of her friends, right beside her new boyfriend on their way to Nationals would be a moment she would never forget... The first day had been exciting as everyone checked in and saw the sights. Around ten Mr. Schuester said lights out. The show wasn't until tomorrow afternoon which meant everyone could grab breakfast and lunch as well as doing any last second practicing. He made sure everyone returned to their shared rooms, warning Puck absolutely no drinking or musical hotel rooms. Quinn knew she would have to wait in line to shower as the girls were spread out all over, changing into their night clothes, and gossiping.

Sugar's latest crush was Rory, and she had announced to the girls that she planned on giving him the ultimate "Going away gift" if they won Nationals. The girls all cracked up before Santana smiled and eyed Quinn who had changed into shorts and one of Joe's baggy T-shirts he had given to her when she asked. Originally he was puzzled when she asked for it, before she rolled her eyes smiling telling him it was something girlfriends did so it felt like their boyfriends were always with them.

Joe still seemed confused but said of course and gave her one of his T-shirts. Quinn wouldn't admit it, but she had yet to wash it in the last few days since it still smelled like Joe's soap and helped her drift off easier, especially with her nerves on edge about the show coming up. Santana smiled and pointed.

"Awwwww look at who's wearing her new boyfriend's hippy dippy T-shirt!" Mercedes stared and looked as if she was melting from cuteness overload.

"Awww Quinn!"

Brittany seemed confused as Tina, Sugar, and Rachel all cooed over how adorable Quinn looked. Shrugging, rolling her eyes, Quinn changed into her sports bra without even taking off Joe's shirt.

"Shut up you guys..."

"I think Joe is super pretty, but I would be careful, her style is very Outdoor World..."

Brittany said, making Quinn chuckle. Checking her phone, she suddenly got an idea and nervously chewed on her lip before Rachel brushed her hair sitting on the edge of one of the beds.

"So? How are things going with Joe? You two looked quite cozy today seeing the sights..."

Tina giggled before Quinn smiled, shrugging feeling color rise in her cheeks.

"It's...all new. I've never had this with a guy before. It's as if...he's seeing the world for the first time. Everything is new to him. He's so sweet..."

"So, it's getting serious?"

Quinn smirked.

"Yeah, sorta. I'm really happy."

"Have you guys talked about next year, I mean...he's younger than all of us..."

Tina butted in, before Santana shot her a look shutting her up. Instantly she waved her hand before walking over and slipping her arms around Brittany.

"Never mind Chef Co. Enjoy and live in the moment...so...are you corrupting our Teen Jesus?"

The girls all giggled, before Quinn rolled her eyes.

"No, we've only kissed."

"Isn't that against his religion though? Like sex is off the table, right Mercedes?"

Sugar asked. Mercedes blushed before shrugging.

"Every Christian is different. Sam isn't a virgin, and...no offense Quinn but we know you aren't. Some churches see sex before marriage as a sin. I guess it all depends on what you're comfortable with."

"And what are you comfortable with Mercedes?"

Santana asked, cocking her head to the side. Sighing, Mercedes shrugged.

"I want to wait, but I guess only time will tell. Hopefully whoever I end up with will respect that."

Santana turned her attention towards Quinn.

"Well, no matter how hard Teen Jesus can pray the boners away, he's still a teenage boy. Maybe you two outta have that talk. I'm sure there's more than one help the kid see God."

"Santana!"

Rachel gasped, before the girls all started cracking up laughing. Quinn laughed along with them, as the subject switched to Rachel's wedding. Standing back. Quinn tuned everything out before she took her phone and quickly texted Joe asking if he was still up.

_**Yeah. Puck is trying to show us how many pops he can chug, it's so gross.**_

Quinn smiled, she had taught Joe how to text and he had caught on pretty quickly.

_**lol well, how about you make an excuse saying you're gonna grab some more cans. Meet me on the second floor near the gym, it's closed.**_

Quinn waited, chewing on her lip, hoping she wouldn't scare him.

Instead, she saw he was typing...

_**Ya? Is that okay? We won't get caught?**_

Quinn smiled and texted even faster.

_**It will only be a few minutes don't worry, I'll say the same thing to the girls. See you in five!**_

Sending the past message, she smirked before slipping the phone into the pocket of her shorts.

"I'm gonna go grab a soda, my stomach is kinda upset, anyone want anything?"

The girls all shook their heads as Tina and Brittany started a pillow fight. Seeing her window to leave now, she carefully slipped out, making sure she had her keycard tucked in her other pocket. Quickly she walked in her flip-flops towards the elevator, feeling her heart hammer in her chest.

**Later...**

Quinn didn't know what came over her, but she had never wanted to kiss and touch someone as much as she wanted to with Joe. The two had met outside the closed gym. Joe was in sweats, and a black tank top showing off his tattoos which fascinated her. The second she saw him, loving how he looped his own hair to make a makeshift ponytail to hold back his dreads. Seeing him, that same excited fluttering filled her chest as well as her stomach. She suspected this was what butterflies felt like. Smiling, she motioned to a spare closet, and pulled him inside before he even got a chance to question what they were doing.

The second she pulled him in, she was on him like a wild animal. Since prom they had taken things very slow. The only time she could truly count them "making-out" was the afternoon that Joe, Sugar, Rory, and Tina stayed after to work on costumes. She had picked him up, and the two had ended up going to get coffee. They took their drinks back to her car, and that's when she pounced. The two had kissed hot and heavy for several minutes, Joe the entire time wide eyed, and surprised.

Quinn helped him place his hands on her hips as she leaned over, plunging her mouth against his. Anytime she tried to move his hands up to her boobs, she felt him shake his head against hers, and place her hands respectfully back on her hips. She wanted to put her tongue in his mouth but held back. In fact, she held back on moaning or anything what would make him uncomfortable. She knew she needed to slow down, but she had never felt his way being kissed before. When finally he pulled back, he was breathless, his hair a complete mess.

"I'm sorry..."

She apologized. Joe looked flushed, before shaking his head.

"No, it's okay...we just gotta go slow okay?"

Quinn nodded staring at him, seeing the top few buttons of his shirt unbuttoned. She wanted so badly to feel his chest, reach down and feel the bulge she saw forming in his shorts. Still, she knew this was un-lady like. She was a good Christian, and knew where sex had gotten her before. Still, she felt a tingling between her own legs, and all she wanted was to kiss him and let her boyfriend feel her body. Instead, he smirked and leaned forward. Pressing his forehead against hers, he took a deep breath and smiled.

"This feels amazing, just remember, I just need to go slow...okay?"

Smiling, Quinn nodded.

"No problem...I'm not lying but you're a really great kisser."

Joe raised an eyebrow surprised.

"Really?"

Quinn giggled.

"Amazing."

Joe smirked, before reaching down and picking her hand up. Kissing the top of her hand, he smiled before sighing and sitting back.

"Cheers?"

He lifted his coffee. Smiling, Quinn nodded and took her own cup, clinking it against his.

"Cheers."

Since then, besides a few innocent kisses, they had been taking it slow. Now tonight, between the nervous excitement of tomorrow, and laying eyes on Joe, she couldn't believe it but she needed to get this off her chest. Joe stood against the closed door and his eyes widened in surprise as well as amusement.

"Hey..." Quinn took a deep breath, nervously twisting her hands together. Joe looked her up and down and smiled crossing his tanned muscular arms.

"Nice shirt."

Quinn wanted to laugh, but she knew if she didn't say this now she would simply chicken out.

"I think I'm falling for you."

Joe took a second, before her words settled between the two of them in the crammed small closet. Quinn stood there, ready for him to tell her she was going too fast, or that she was acting like a psycho and leave her there humiliated. Instead, Joe blinked, eyes raised.

"Wow..."

Quinn sighed.

"Yeah..."

Quinn closed her eyes, bowing her head.

"Listen, I know we just started dating, and we haven't exactly talked about everything...but...I can't stop thinking about you. You're not like any guy I've ever been with and that's a good thing. I..."

Before she could say another word, Joe stepped forward, gently tilting her chin up, making her open her eyes and stare up at him. Her eyes were wide, filling with tears as she stared at him. Joe smiled, before leaning forward, and pressed his forehead against hers. Ever since that day in the car, this had become their "thing". Usually whenever they stopped by each other's lockers. Smiling, she stared up at him, before Joe smiled.

"I think I'm falling for you too Quinn."

Quinn felt her heart pound.

"Really?!"

Joe grinned, his eyes squinting as he stared down at her. Relieved, Quinn smiled, feeling as if she might faint. Staring at him, she found his hands and squeezed them, hearing his bracelets jingle.

"I love you Joe."

"I love you Quinn..."

Before she could say another word, Joe closed his eyes, leaning down and softly kissing her lips. Smiling through the kiss, Quinn sighed through the kiss as she tilted her head, slowly feeling his lips move against hers. Smiling through it, she then very gently slipped her tongue, flickering it against his, tasting whatever pop he had been drinking. She sensed his surprise, but slowly responded, not exactly sure what to do. Enjoying this, Quinn gently held the back of his head, pressing her lips harder against his, as she continued deeply kissing him.

His tongue was hesitant, but found her mouth and quickly darted in and out. That's when Quinn's hand slowly snuck down to the waistband of his sweats. Her hand traveled down on top, before she cupped the bulge that had formed there. Instantly Joe stiffened, and pulled back at lighting speed. His eyes huge, completely caught off guard.

"Quinn..."

Quinn knew what she was doing, but couldn't help it. Smiling, she squeezed tighter before leaning in and softly whispered in his ear...

"You feel big...can I see it?"

"Quinn!"

Joe nearly stumbled back, slamming against the door, face bright red. Quinn no longer embarrassed, simply smiled before she looked down at his pants. She was enjoying the view since he was wearing grey sweatpants.

"What? You can't hide the fact I'm making that happen...I've seen and felt it before. Remember that time in physical therapy?"

Joe lowered his eyes embarrassed.

"I'm sorry..."

"Joe..."

She stepped forward and he stared up frightened. Sighing, she knew she had to be patient.

"Listen, we're going to have to talk about...you know...it soon."

Joe's eyes widened.

"It?!"

He looked down at himself, and Quinn giggled shaking her head.

"Not just that...sex. Where you stand. I don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable doing. But remember, sex is natural...we can do stuff without doing it."

"Really?!"

"Yeah, whatever you're comfortable with. Like I said...I would never come between you and your faith, but...we're both young Joe and I'm very attracted to you. We need to be honest with each other. Maybe after all this craziness dies down once we get home...whatever ends up happening, we can sit down and talk."

"Quinn, I don't want you wasting your time...it's just..."

Quinn shook her head.

"You're not. I love you Joe...and I'm sorry to ruin the moment like this..."

"You didn't..."

"Yeah well, like I said we'll talk...like two young adults in a relationship. We'll figure something out. Whatever it is, I promise...I'm not going anywhere Joe okay?"

"You mean it?"

"Promise."

Blushing, Joe nodded before he sighed.

"I'm so confused...but...besides my parents and...like to God...you're the first person I've said said that to."

"Love?"

"Yeah..."

"Well...you're the first guy I know for certain that I mean it, and I'm willing to put in the extra work not to mess this up."

Joe looked both grateful and relieved. Smiling, he stepped forward before tightly wrapping his arms around her. Playfully he lifted her off the ground, giving her a tight squeeze. Giggling, Quinn laughed as he kissed the top of her head, and nuzzled her cheek. Setting her down, he smiled before he leaned down and pressed his forehead back up against hers. Both stood there, smiling, staring into each other's eyes, before Joe gulped.

"If we win tomorrow...and once we're home and we talk...maybe we...can...like do...some stuff...but like I said we gotta go..."

"Slow...I got it. Are you sure?"

Joe nervously shrugged.

"Yeah, I think so..."

"Whatever you're comfortable with, I promise."

"I trust you."

Quinn smiled before she stared up at him.

"We're not bad Christians Joe. We can do stuff like normal teenagers without going all the way. I can show you how not to feel dirty...how to learn how you body works, and I can show you mine...we just gotta trust each other okay?"

Joe nodded, before Quinn smiled and leaned up, kissing his cheek. Stepping back, knowing she had to get back before the girls started getting curious, she took a deep breath before smiling.

"I'll see you in the morning, we'll practice until we drop."

"You're going to be amazing. I promise."

"I hope so...say an extra prayer for my dance moves tonight."

"Always."

Joe said smiling. Pulling away, Quinn knew what she was going to do. She didn't want to push things, but she was still riding the high of the excitement from tonight.

"I gotta go, I'll text you before I go to sleep. Love you..."

She went to the door, ready to open it.

"Love you too..."

Joe said behind her. Smiling, she passed before turning and looking back at him.

"Wait a minute until I leave in case anyone is walking by."

Joe nodded, before Quinn smiled.

"Hey Joe..."

She turned, before lifting his T-shirt and her sports bra, flashing him her breasts for less than a few seconds. Seeing Joe's eyes nearly pop out of his head, she completely lost it, cracking up as she dropped her shirt. Joe turned every single shade of red, before Quinn smiled.

"Remember, it's not a sin to look..."

With that she winked, before opening the door, and walking out. Heading down the hallway, she couldn't stop smiling, feeling giddy with excitement both over the fact she just did something like this, getting that kind of priceless reaction from Joe, as well as finally confessing that they loved each other. Suddenly she was no longer nervous about the show tomorrow. She was certain she would do fine if Joe was sharing the stage with her tomorrow.

Now all these years later she found herself chucking sitting across from her husband in his hospital room.

"What's so funny?"

Quinn made a face, still laughing.

"Remember when I flashed you the night before Nationals?"

Joe made a face and cracked a smile.

"How could I forget?"

Quinn laughed before lifting one of his hands kissing his hand before leaning forward and pressing her forehead against his again. At this exact moment she wanted nothing more than to return to that time when everything still seemed so possible, and she honestly believed she had the rest of her life to continue falling further and further in love with Joe.

Now time was sadly ticking away...


	5. Stereo Hearts

"Hey Joe..."

Quinn spotted the new kid sitting in the library, his earbuds in, and a few of his books spread out before him durning study hall. Tomorrow the God Squad was planning on singing to a total of seven different students throughout the school, the first being Rachel from Finn outside in the courtyard to Gym Class Heroes Stereo Hearts. Joe was planning on playing guitar, while Sam would rap, and Mercedes and herself were going to sing lead vocals. She suspected Joe was a little nervous since he really hadn't listened to any music besides Christian stuff, but yesterday Quinn helped him download iTunes on her phone, and uploaded all of the songs they were practicing to sing. Joe looked cute wearing a pullover sweater, his huge huge dreads pulled back as his eyes scanned his notebook as he jotted down notes, his left hand lightly drumming against his jean clad thigh as he seemed to be in his own world listening to his music. Smiling, she clutched her books and walked over, knowing he hadn't heard her. Walking behind him, she closely studied his thick hair, fascinated by his dreads. Besides a woman that worked at the supermarket, she had never seen anyone, let alone a young white guy with that kind of hairstyle. She found it interesting, as well as his tattoos.

She knew the ones on his collarbone were bible quotes, but she had seen anchors on his arms as well. She herself had a tattoo, one that she was all ready in the process of removing after her mini "breakdown". Still, she was curious to see them up close. She found it funny that as sheltered as he seemed, innocent from being homeschooled, by first glance he really didn't seem like it with his nose rings and tats. Still, there was something pure and sweet about him. The other day durning their God Squad meeting her heart basically melted when he admitted that his mother was his best friend. Used to jerks at school, this seemed refreshing to meet someone who wasn't embarrassed to admit such things. She loved how wide eyed and childlike he seemed when she was teaching him about his phone and downloading music. It almost seemed like he was from a different planet and she was able to introduce him to all these new and amazing things. Smiling, she figured to say "screw it" and leaned over, gently slipping her hands over his eyes. Joe sat up straighter, stiffening, as he popped one of his earbuds out. She could hear Stereo Hearts blasting. Smiling, she cocked her head to the side.

"Guess who?" She heard Joe lightly chuckle.

"Quinn?"

"Ding! Ding! Ding!"

She released her hands and pulled the chair out beside him and sat down, setting her books in front of her. Turning, Joe smiled and yet again Quinn was struck by how absolutely handsome he seemed. Smiling, she stared at him.

"Can I ask you something?"

Joe blinked before smirking.

"Um, yeah sure."

"What nationality are you?"

Joe smiled back at her.

"Is it the hair throwing you off?"

Quinn shrugged.

"Call me nosey but I'm always interested to know people's backgrounds. You seem like you can tan easily..."

A little color filled in his cheeks as he smiled.

"I'm Irish and Mexican."

"Really?!"

"Yeah my dad is Irish and English I think. My mom was originally born in South America but she's a hundred percent Mexican. Once she became a citizen, she met my dad through their church and a few years later had me."

"Wow, that's amazing. Have you ever been?"

"Mexico? Yeah all the time. My grandmother and uncles still live down there. We usually go every summer."

"Do you have any siblings?"

"None. I guess my parents had a hard time having me so I've been their only kid. What about you?"

"Same only child. You close with your parents?"

Joe smiled proudly and nodded.

"Yeah, my parents are super cool...well at least I think so. My father sells bibles, but got offered this really great job at a printing company. Basically it mass produces books for churches and schools. It pays really good and when he got offered it we moved here from Arizona. My mother is a crisis councilor, she works from home. Basically it's a hotline that people call when they need someone to talk to...like if they're sick, or being abused or stuff like that. She's super awesome, I've heard her work before. People call up all the time with heavy issues. They usually use fake names but this one girl called saying she wanted to kill herself. I guess she's been addicted to drugs and stuff and got kicked out by her parents. Well my mother talked with her for a few hours and she was so soothing and calm. I listened as the girl slowly started to open up and by the end she asked for some support group addresses, and now she calls my mother's line twice a week and as far as I know she's clean and living in a support house, working...and sounds actually happy. She says my mom even though both have never met face to face feels more like a parent than her own. That's the kind of person she is. Super easy to talk to, really down to Earth and legit the kindest person ever. She fully supported my choice in wanting to actually go to real school."

"She sounds really amazing...I can tell you two are close, just by hearing you talk about her."

Joe smirked, blushing more.

"What church do you go to?"

"St. Paul's on Anderson St. Do you know it?"

"I do, I've never been. I usually go to St. Lucy's."

"What about you? Are you close with your parents?"

Instantly Quinn felt a strange twisting in her stomach. Whenever she thought of her father, she thought back on the whole Beth ordeal which she still felt she had torn feelings about. Chewing on her bottom lip she wasn't sure if she was about to open about all of this to a complete stranger, mostly one she found a little cute, and clearly was a strict Christian. Sighing, she figured she might as well be honest, it was only a matter of time before he found out. Sighing deeply, she scanned the library, seeing nobody was sitting that close to hear, not that it even mattered. Looking him in the eye, she raised her eyebrows.

"I live with my mom, and we're close...well as close as we can be. She lives in her own little world, but nevertheless she's a good person. My dad...well, he moved out about two years ago. We haven't spoken...well since I had my daughter and gave her up for adoption."

Joe raised an eyebrow, and Quinn struggled to keep her voice even.

"You...have a daughter?"

Quinn nodded, feeling suddenly very ashamed.

"Sophomore year...I lost my virginity to Noah Puckerman...Puck."

"The kids with the mohawk?"

Quinn rolled her eyes giving a humorless laugh and nodded.

"Yeah. Well I was dating Finn at the time, and I cheated on him with Puck. We only did it that once, and well...I got pregnant. It was my own fault, we didn't use protection...but I got pregnant and...well I'm sure you understand I don't believe in abortion. That time I was...scared, and selfish. I lied saying it was Finn's, nearly destroying his life. In the end the truth came out and well...my father was disgusted with me. He threw me out and I lived with Mercedes and her family. I still don't know what I would do without her. I suddenly got to see the truly ugly side of high school. Everyone saw me as the dumb teenager who got knocked up. I got kicked off the cheerleading team, and truly hit rock bottom. In the end durning Nationals...I went into labor."

Joe's eyes widened as she went on.

"I gave birth to a baby girl. Beth. Around this time my mother had kicked my dad out. He was cheating on her, and called me every name in the book after he found out about the baby. I knew I wasn't ready to be a mother, let alone give Beth the life she deserved. Rachel Berry's birth mother...Shelby Corcoran, who actually taught here for awhile...she ended up adopting Beth. They moved back to New York, and she sends me photos of Beth, and emails me a lot. I just visited her a few months ago. After giving Beth up I had a hard time. I guess it was my way of rebelling. I acted like a total jerk...mostly to Shelby before it dawned on me how lucky I was. I had this successful, kind, caring, wonderful woman take my daughter. She's her real mother, and she's doing a wonderful job raising her. I pray every night thanking God that...Beth wasn't a mistake, but a lesson. So much has changed since then, and I'm lucky Shelby allows me to be part of her life."

Quinn suddenly felt as if she had just rolled a thirty pound weight off her chest. Her stomach continued to twist, and now it was out in the open. She had just confessed to this complete stranger that she had sex before marriage, got pregnant, and gave her baby up. To a Christian, she knew what he was thinking, and wouldn't be the slightest bit stunned if he just got up, completely disgusted and never spoke to her again. Instead, he smiled.

"Do you have a photo of her?"

Quinn blinked, at first thinking she wasn't hearing right.

"What?"

"Do you have a photo of your daughter?"

Quinn took a second before slowly smiling. Reaching for her phone, she unlocked it and quickly began to scroll, before finding her latest photo of Beth Shelby had sent her. Smiling, she handed him her phone. Joe leaned down, looking down at it it, she saw him smile, something that made him look down right adorable.

"She's beautiful...just like her mother."

Quinn blushed, laughing lightly before sighing. Now that she got this off her chest, she felt maybe it might be easier to talk with Joe. Motioning with her head, she looked down at his phone.

"Practicing?"

Joe smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, I've playing it on my guitar at home. All of the songs are pretty easy but I heard this song is from one of the glee members to another glee member, these are your friends right? Wait Finn was..."

"Ex boyfriend, but don't worry we're all friends. Sam and me even dated last year."

"Wow..."

"I know, for a nice Christian girl I sure do get around..."

Joe made a face.

"Hey stop that. Just trying to keep up...Sam is super cool. We have a bunch of classes together, he's awesome. Now isn't he dating Mercedes?"

Quinn smiled.

"Sorta...I think, but both won't admit it. Welcome to high school drama Joe, it sure gets interesting."

Joe laughed before Quinn stared at him.

"So...have you ever had...a girlfriend?"

It was Joe's time to blush. Smiling, he looked down.

"Um no...never."

"Never?"

Joe lifted his eyes and nodded, looking more than a little embarrassed.

"No..."

Quinn smiled, knowing he was uncomfortable. Shrugging she reached across and lifted up his phone.

"Let's give this another listen..."

She noticed him writing the lyrics down on his notebook and smiled.

"You have nice handwriting..."

Joe smirked as he fixed the cords of his phone. Handing her one he laughed.

"Thanks..."

Just as Quinn reached for the other earbud, her hand briefly brushed up against Joe's Seeing him stiffen again, she smirked and smiled staring at his tattoos. Sitting this close, smelling the clean scent of his soap, and closely studying his tattoos, lightly tanned skin, piercing, and dark hazel eyes that seemed greener than they ever appeared. Smiling at him, she popped the earbud in, as he did the same with his side, and pressed play.

Both having no idea that a few years from now they would be dancing to Stereo Hearts at their wedding.

**Present**

Quinn had changed into shorts, and tank top she wore beneath her blouse when it was time for Joe to head downstairs to bathe. Usually he showered with help by either her or one of the nurses in the bathroom in his room. Twice a week he was allowed to go to the physical therapy room downstairs where the steel tubs and jacuzzis were. On Tuesdays from one to three the entire room was empty and thanks to Nancy pulling some strings, Joe was allowed to take a bath in complete privacy. Before Nancy's shift change, she helped Joe into his wheelchair before letting Quinn push him to the elevator. Once alone, Quinn drew a steaming hot bath, helping Joe undress, with fresh clothes folded off to the side. With help, she carefully eased him into the tub, his arm draped around her neck loosely, before he carefully laid him into the water.

"Too hot?"

Joe shook his head, closing his eyes and sighing with relief.

"Actually feels great..."

Quinn smiled, dragging a chair over and sat beside him as he tilted his head back. Using the sponge she brought, she put it under the water before gently washing his thin chest, working over his shoulders, and down to his stomach. Over these past few months he had lost so much weight any muscles he had were gone. It killed her to see his ribs. Humming softly, she continued to wash her husband's body. Staring at his face, looking so content and peaceful. She missed his dreads, and knew how thin his hair was now. Still, it looked nice despite the new length. Looking at him, she felt such overwhelming love in her heart it seemed dangerous.

The very thought of losing him completely terrified her. He was always her strength, the one to calm her down when things got too overwhelming. She remembered she had only seen him cry a handful of times, the worst being when he arrived at the doctor's office after learning that their son was dead. She remembered him rushing into the back room where she was completely hysterical, sobbing. In just an instant, he was by her side, wrapping her arms around tightly around her, letting her nuzzle her face against his chest as she howled, telling him over and over again that she didn't understand what the doctors were saying. She heard him cry against her, but never once let her go.

The very idea of him no longer being with her scared her to death, but she refused to think about it.

Instead, all she wanted to do was take care of him and make him feel good. Slowly she let the sponge drop into the water with a soft plop, before her hand traveled down to his stomach, and the tiny trail of hair that began below his belly button and down beneath the surface of the water. Closely staring at him, her hand continued to travel down...before her hand reached down, and wrapped around his penis. Cracking open an eye, he stared at her and smirked.

"Somebody could walk in..." He said in a low voice. Quinn smiled as she continued to squeeze gently and release, squeeze and release, and squeeze and release...

"Nope, we're all alone..."

She slowly started bringing her hand up and down his shaft beneath the water as she leaned forward, never taking her eyes off him. Joe gulped, before he opened his eyes and stared up at the ceiling. She knew this drove him nuts. In fact, back when they first started getting physical, this was one of the first things she ever tried on him, and it absolutely drove him wild. Enjoying that she was able to make him feel good, she continued gently squeezing as her hand continued moving up and down, quickening at her pace. She saw beads of sweat starting to form on his forehead, as he gulped, his Adam's apple slowly going up and down. Her slender fingers continued to rub, feeling him grow harder and harder, loving having his power over him. After just a few minutes, suddenly he snapped his eyes shut, swallowed hard, and she felt him twitch, before he moaned and climaxed beneath the water. Smiling, she felt his sex soften in her hand, before he took a deep breath and opened his eyes, staring at her.

"Wow...where did that come from?"

Quinn smiled at him, before shrugging.

"Guess I wanted to make your afternoon."

Joe laughed before reaching and taking her other hand kissing it.

"Well thank you, I didn't think I had it in me with all these meds in my system but that was a nice little surprise..."

Quinn smiled before she leaned forward, and kissed his cheek.

"I love you Joe Hart..."

"I love you too Quinn Hart."

"Maybe...tonight, we can..."

Joe laughed.

"Might have to wait until Nancy is back on shift, that's all we need...Betsy walking in checking my IV bag and finding us under the covers again."

Quinn giggled shaking her head.

"That was so embarrassing!"

Joe laughed before cocking his head to the side.

"I might not be able to...like last time. I'm sorry..."

Quinn's brow wrinkled before she shook her head.

"Don't ever apologize...you hear me?"

Joe sadly smirked before nodding.

"Yeah..."

With that Quinn got up, before loosely wrapping her arms around his neck, and plopping herself down into the tub with him. Water splashed and went over the sides as Joe started cracking up.

"Quinn!"

Quinn laughed, ignoring her soaking wet clothes, before she pressed her forehead against his. Smiling, Quinn pressed her forehead against his, before leaning over and deeply kissing him. Once the kiss broke, both stared into each other's eyes before Quinn shut her eyes, enjoying his moment alone with her husband. At this time she ignored any pain they shared. Their son, his cancer, the future...no, at this exact moment they were just being silly and in love, pretending that noting bad could ever happen.

Even though Quinn knew she could never be more wrong...

Time was running out with the love of her life, and it absolutely terrified her.


	6. Gray whales

**Present**

Quinn had logged into work on her computer. putting in a few hours while Joe was given some more pain medication and slept soundly beside her. She sat up as he slept beside her. Ever since graduating, she had gotten a good paying job through a pretty successful insurance company. She was inspired after dealing with her mother's insurance after her accident senior year. She knew it wasn't the most glamorous job, but it paid well, and ninety percent of it she was able to work from home. The company she worked for had been beyond understanding over the years, and four days a week she usually logged in her hours from the hospital, occasionally coming in for meetings. Typing away, she had the TV on low as the evening news had just come on. She thought about what Joe had said earlier about Rachel visiting. She knew the kids from Glee had been wanting to plan a reunion soon. They all belonged to the same group text and Kurt and Blaine were in the middle of trying to whip something together. Sam was working as the new glee teacher back at school, attending night school to earn his degree, having been granted a waver to teach there as long as he was enrolled in school. The same was being done for Joe who was in the process of trying to start teaching religion until he got sick. Rachel had returned back to school and was currently finishing up her degree, while also appearing yet again in a broadway show that was all ready getting rave reviews.

Kurt and Blaine were both finishing up school themselves. Kurt at NYADA, and Blaine at NYU. Mercedes was finishing up her latest album on the West Coast, Arnie was at film school in New York, Sugar studying fashion in Europe (rumors were that she was dating Rory who was attending school in the UK now.) Tina was still in school, and was actually the one who kept the group chat going the most out of all of them. Mike was in Chicago, and Santana and Brittany were actualy living in New York as well. Santana still booking successful commercials, while Brittany was running a pretty cool podcast. Everyone seemed content and happy, yet...Quinn knew when they all did get together, the same sympathy looks and glances would be shot her way. Santana, Mercedes, and Brittany had been beyond comforting and sweet after she lost the baby. In fact, she remembered even Rachel visiting and the moment she walked into her living room, she saw tears fill those sad brown eyes of hers. Suddenly she felt guilty about not attending Finn's funeral. This was long before grief and loss had affected her. She was hurting too much, and simply didn't want to face it. Instead Joe came to visit her that weekend where she cried in her dorm room with him laying with her on her bunk. The girls had spent a whole weekend with her, comforting her, and trying everything possible to take her mind off things. She had seen and spoken to a few of them since then, including after Joe first collapsed, resulting in him getting diagnosed. Sam had been the closest with them since they officially relocated here. He usually came over twice a week to help Quinn around the house since Joe was at the hospital.

It was little things like cleaning the gutters, mowing the lawn, cutting down the hedges, changing fuses, and even relighting her furnace when the pilot went out one night. Joe and her had bought a small cute little cape just on the outside of town in a nice little neighborhood. It was navy blue with burgundy shudders and door. Her mother had since sold their house after she left for Yale, and as a wedding present to Joe and her, helped her put down a pretty impressive down payment on their first home. Originally they rented back in Connecticut, until finally they decided to move back home. They put a good down payment, resulting in them only having a ten year mortgage. It had two bedrooms, two bathrooms, an office, kitchen, living room, and three season porch out back. The basement was partially finished, and had spent the first few months after moving in making it their own. In fact, those two years living here had been the happiest of her life. Still, with Joe in the hospital it suddenly felt way too big for just her. At night she felt scared, and somehow having Sam over to putter around and do things Joe usually did put her mind to ease. Joe felt better that Sam was there to help, and constantly tried to pay him even though Sam refused. He loved working at the high school, and flew out once a month to see Mercedes. He confessed to Quinn one night after she made him pasta after he helped fix the upstairs shower head that he wanted to propose, but knew he needed to wait. Mercedes still had big dreams, and he wasn't about to hold her back. He had achieved his dreams of being a model. Now he loved being back home, following in Mr. Schuester's footsteps , and leading by example.

In fact, he confided to Quinn that Mercedes was special, and the thought of them being together somehow made sense. Smiling, Quinn told him to go for it, she did with Joe and she's never looked back. Since then, Sam started visiting her, and each time he came back he seemed happier and happier. Sighing, Quinn opened her phone and opened the group chat which she had been forced to mute since it was constantly dinging on and on. Looking, she knew she was days behind, having to catch up. She rolled her eyes, before setting the phone down and logging off and carefully shutting her laptop and sliding it into her bag that leaned against the nightstand. Shifting her weight to get comfortable, she laid back before taking a deep breath and opening the group chat and scrolling back, it nearly took her ten minutes until finally she saw where she last left off.

Laying back, she gently put his arm around her husband, snuggling in close to him, comforted by the sound of his breathing. Reading, she chuckled to herself by the comments of her friends, the witty banter between Santana and everyone else. The adorable clueless remarks by Brittany, the sass of Kurt, and Tina still reminding them that they needed to have a reunion ASAP. It seemed as though Rachel, and Jessie were going to be visiting Rachel's dads, even though separated, still all got together for alll of their birthdays every year. Seeing that they had a week off, Kurt and Blaine were clearing their schedules to do the same. Mike was unable to make it, but Tina was trying everyday possible. Artie was in the middle of filming one of his student films and couldn't make it as well. So far the plan was everyone would meet up at Breadsticks next Thursday at six. Most of them were staying with family or getting hotels. Sighing, Quinn knew she outta make the effort.

Trying to think if Joe had anything big coming up next week appointment wise, she clicked her calendar open and scrolled it, seeing nothing. Going back to the group chat, she texted quickly...

_**Hey guys, sorry for the radio silence. Thursday works good for me. If anyone wants maybe they can come back afterwards to the hospital to come see Joe. I bet he would love to see you guys. If anyone needs a place to crash I have a spare room!**_

The second she pressed send, she knew a million text messages would be sent her way. Not really wanting to deal with it tonight, she put her phone on silent, before carefully down on the nightstand. Turning towards Joe, she stared at him, sleeping so soundly. She hated how many meds they were pumping him full of now. Half of the time he stay stoned, blankly staring ahead as if he was trapped beneath the water with a thick layer of ice preventing him from functioning. She suspected with the amount they were giving him now it was measures taken so he wouldn't be in any pain. Most likely if by some miracle he survived this, he would be left a junkie. Still, she felt relieved whenever the nurse would inject his IV, almost instantly she would watch the discomfort vanish from his face. The sweating stopping, the flushed color leaving, and suddenly a glazed over relaxed look of relief settling in. Tonight he had nodded off, curled up right beside her as she worked, listening to him breath, hating that in the back of his mind the entire time she kept listening for any sign of trouble.

Waiting for the machines and alarms to sound, signaling that Joe's heart had stopped, and he had stopped breathing. Staring at her husband, she smiled completely fascinated by him. She rested her head against the pillow, staring at him. She loved his jewelry, most of which was left at home since the doctors said it got in the way. He still wore his crucifix, and none of his rings, there were a few bracelets, all of which on his other hand that rarely got used for IVs. She laid there, staring at his shorter hair, and how all of his piercings had been taken out as well. She could spot his bible quote near his collarbone

_"I will love thee O Lord My strength." _

From Psalm 18. She adored his tattoos, and had even gone with him when he got four more over the course of their back on those times, all memorable in their own special way. She remembered when they both got Nash's name shortly after they lost him. Both had gone through Hell, and after Quinn had a complete and total breakdown in what was supposed to be his nursery, she collapsed sobbing, surrounded by the boxes that were supposed to go out to Goodwill. She remembered him gathering her into his arms after her knees buckled and she completely lost it. She remembered him tightly holding her, kissing the top of her head, promising her everything was going to be okay.

It all started one evening when Quinn left the shower after blowdrying her hair, and changing into fresh clothes. In the shower she had had another crying fit, bowing her head, and holding onto the shower walls, thankful that the sound of the water drowned out her cries. Since she delivered Nash, she had been walking a thin tightrope from having a complete breakdown. The doctor had put her on several medications to cope, but the reality was truly setting in that fate had been beyond cruel to both Joe and herself. Her beautiful baby boy had died. The baby they had been so excited about. The same baby she felt grow inside of her, turning her stomach into a perfectly round bump like it had with Beth. The same baby she remembered Joe's jaw dropping in complete and utter surprise when Dr. Weathers confirmed the news that Quinn was indeed pregnant.

The same baby she spent many nights, gently feeling the fluttering kicks from inside of her as Joe would lay his ear against the swell of her stomach and softly sing too. The same baby that she had dreamed about having, knowing after Beth this was finally her chance to be a mother and do everything right with. It just seemed like yesterday that Blaine and Kurt surprised her with an adorable baby shower at Breadsticks just a few months ago. Those twenty-four hours in the hospital, being forced to deliver her son. She remembered being given the drugs to start the labor, and them breaking her water for her and how painful it was. She remembered those long endless hours in that hospital room, hating how miserible this event was. How things were supposed to be so different. How in her mind she thought the day she delivered was supposed to be scary, but exciting time. How she was going to deliver her son naturally like with Beth. She had taken lamaze classes with Joe, fully prepared this time, knowing very well what to expect this time around. She had thought things over, how she could see herself breathing, and bearing through the pain with Joe right at her side.

She thought of how she was supposed to fight through the pain, Joe squeezing her hand, coaxing her on as her healthy beautiful baby boy slid out of her crying, his lungs full of oxygen as they watched Dr. Weathers smile holding up the squirming baby, still attached to the cord announcing it was boy. She never dared to fantasized any further about what could have been. It was too painful. Instead, she laid back, weeping softly as Joe prayed and held her hand. Hours of being in labor it was finally time. Dr. Weathers came in along with a nurse, and Joe helped spread one of her legs. She was told to breathe, as tears ran down her face, and after almost an hour finally her baby came out, gray, cold, and lifeless. Quinn collapsed, exhausted as the Dr. Weathers sighed, asking Joe if he wanted to cut the cord. Joe, who's own eyes were filled with tears, simply shook his head, before leaning over and kissing Quinn's temple.

Dr. Weathers cut the cord, and after a few minutes came back with the baby cleaned up and wrapped up in a blanket. His tiny eyelids blue and closed. When the doctor asked if she wanted to hold him, Quinn uttered a miserable cry and turned away as the nurse worked on delivering everything else out of her. She was humiliated, and heartbroken. Instead Joe took his head son, and stood by the window silently holding him, staring down at his tiny little face in complete wonder. It took almost half the night until finally their priest came to baptize Nash that Quinn agreed to hold him before he was taken away. The councilor who worked for the hospital offered to take photos of them holding him, but Quinn refused. Instead she sat up, sore, and drugged up, exhausted as her baby was placed in her arms. He felt cold, and she sat there wishing so badly this was just some horrible mistake.

That the baby's gray face with flush with color as his little eyelids opened and he began to scream and cry. Instead, nothing. She held him for almost an hour, Joe sitting beside her, staring down at their baby. She could tell he would have looked just like Joe.

"I'm so sorry..."

She croaked, tears spilling down her face. Leaning down, she kissed his cold tiny little forehead, feeling everything inside of her crumple as she laid her head against Joe's shoulder. Shutting her eyes, she began to weep as Joe held her, knowing this would be the first and last time they were all together as a family. Now all this time later, she was back home, fighting though massive depression. Refusing to go to therapy, sleeping through the days, barley eating, and just pushing through. She was still sore from the delivery, and popped her pills for both pain and depression like they were candy, not feeling a single thing. Joe had been amazing, sticking by her side, pushing aside his own grief. Just the night before, Quinn and him got into quite the argument when she tried to pull down his sweatpants when they were laying in bed watching the news. Joe stiffened and told her the doctor said they still had a few more weeks to wait until they could have sex again. Quinn desperate, licked her lips telling him the doctor didn't know what she was talking about.

She kissed him desperately, before trying to pull his pants down again. Joe sighed, gently kissing her back before shaking his head telling her they couldn't.

"I wanna have another baby, come on...we can start trying again."

Joe froze, raising an eyebrow.

"What?"

Quinn sighed, knowing exactly what he was thinking.

"What? We can try again. You got me pregnant so fast once I stopped taking the pill. I bet we could do it after trying a few times..."

"Quinn, we can't...we still haven't processed what happened..."

"Processed what?! That our baby boy died while still inside of me? I want another baby Joe, don't you?"

"Of course I do...it's all I want, but this isn't the right time. We need time to heal before trying again. Maybe in a few months..."

Quinn furious shook her head.

"Quinn..."

Turning over, she snapped the lamp off on the nightstand, before she felt Joe shift over and touch her.

"Quinn..."

"Leave me alone Joe, I just wanna sleep."

She heard Joe sigh, but instead of turning over himself, he laid closer, draping his arm over her and began to softly rub her arm. She wanted so badly to snap at him again, but instead she stared forward in the darkness, fighting back tears. The next morning, they didn't say a word of the night before. She shuffled through her morning not doing much. She picked at her breakfast, laid on the couch watching TV, blankly responded when Joe kissed her cheek before leaving for class, and ended up taking a few pills and fell asleep again. When Joe came home he had yellow roses for her which were her favorite. He cooked dinner, talking about his day, while Quinn simply sat back stoned from her latest pill she took shortly after he came home. She went to shower where she had another crying fit, before she dried her hair, changed and heard Joe moving around down the hall in the nursery. She walked down, and stopped in the doorway. She stared in, and couldn't believe her eyes. Joe stood in a T-shirt and jeans, his dreads pulled back.

She watched horrified as he stood in the spare room they had spent so much time transforming into their nursery for their little boy. They had spent one Saturday shortly after finding out the sex of the baby painting using a beautiful shade of gray Quinn had spent nearly a whole day narrowing it down over with. Joe did most of the work, also using nontoxic paint so Quinn wouldn't get any of the fumes. They spent the day listing to music, eating pizza, and laying down plastic tarps Joe picked up at the hardware store. The two windows were open, which faced the front lawn.

It was a beautiful day, and both ended up getting a playful little paint fight, dabbing each other with the brushes and rollers, cracking up before Quinn thought of an idea for the nursery. That night Joe returned with a beautiful boarder of tiny silver and blue whales and boats. The next day, he woke her up to breakfast in bed and wanted her once she was finished to check out the paint job now that it dried overnight. Woofing down her pancakes, she followed him down the hall, before stopping dead in her tracks and gasped. Sitting in the middle of the room was a beautiful rustic white beach wood crib she had her eyes on last month when they went to the mall, shopping for new bedding Quinn had wanted ever since it went on sale. They walked through the department store, browsing the different displays. When they reached the baby section Joe smirked, before asking if she wanted to look at baby clothes? Making a face, Quinn looked down at the giant plastic bag with their beautiful black and red checkered bedding that she couldn't wait to lay down on their queen sized mattress back home.

"I don't know...it might be bad luck to start buying stuff all ready."

Joe made a face before directing his cart towards the section.

"Oh please, come on...my treat, pick out the cutest outfit you can find."

Quinn giggled, walking beside him, linking her arm into his as he kept pushing the cart.

"But we don't know what we're having..."

Joe shrugged.

"Doesn't matter. If we have a little girl she'll be a princess but she'll be bad ass like her mom and totaly be able to rock blue or overalls with little trucks on them. If it's a boy he'll totally rock pink like a rockstar. Right?"

Quinn gazed up at him, feeling her heart flutter deep inside of her chest.

"God I'm in love with you..."

Joe laughed before leaning over and giving her a loud wet smack on her cheek. In the end Joe spoiled Quinn and sprang for a tiny little red sweater with a puppy dog knitted on it with small jeans, and miniature blue sneakers. They also bought a complete adorable purple onesie covered in stars. On their way towards the checkout, Quinn stopped dead in her tracks and smiled once she saw the crib. There it was, with a mobile of tiny wooden whales hanging over it. Smiling, she tilted her head and stared at it.

"Awwww!"

She walked over, leaning against the railing, looking at how absolutely beautiful it looked with the carved wood. Staring down at it, she ran her hands against the smooth surface, before Joe wheeled the cart over and walked behind her, putting his arms gently around her and patting her tiny baby bump that had just started to show. "Wow, this is real nice." Quinn raised an eyebrow staring at the large plastic attached price tag.

"Yeah a little too nice."

"That's not that bad..."

"Yeah we'll get this and end up having to live in it after losing our house."

Joe laughed, nuzzling her neck before Quinn shrugged.

"Come on, let's go I wanna break in our new bedding..."

Laughing they left, and now a month later Joe had surprised her with buying the crib, along with the wooden whale mobile hanging over it. Eyes wide, she slowly walked over completely speechless. Slowly raising her hand to her open mouth, she walked over and stared at it in complete disbelief. Slowly turning, she looked at Joe leaning against the doorway, in a button down cranberry blue dress shirt, and torn jeans. His hair was back, and in this early morning light, smiling at his wife's reaction, he never looked more handsome than he ever did. Staring at him, her eyes filled with tears.

"Joe..."

Joe walked in.

"You like it? I was afraid the movers were going to wake you..."

Quinn was so overwhelmed, she stood back, tears spilling down her cheeks, her hormones completely destroying her as she started completely sobbing.

"This...is...too much...I..."

She couldn't finish as Joe laughed, gathering her in his arms. Crying, she buried and nuzzled her face against his shirt. Joe rubbed her back, smiling before kissing the top of her head.

"Honey don't...this is supposed to be a happy surprise..."

Quinn lifted her face eyes puffy from the tears as she smiled.

"I know, it's just...this is the sweetest thing ever. You're too sweet...but this costs way too much."

"Don't worry about it. Ever since I saw you fall in love with it, I made sure to start saving for it. I preordered it about a week ago, and arranged for it to be delivered today after yesterday's appointment. I figured we can start making this room up for our little boy...fitting with the whales huh?"

He motioned to the boarder as Quinn laughed, wiping her face with the back of her hands.

"It's perfect..."

She then motioned down to her stomach, laying her hands against it.

"He'll love it."

Smiling, Joe smirked before stepping forward and gently kissed her. Both having no idea that their little boy would tragically never get the chance to ever sleep in this crib. Now all these months later, Quinn saw Joe with a pile of cardboard boxes all marked for the Goodwill. He was slowly packing everything away. One box was completely full of all of the baby clothes they had received at their baby shower or bought themselves. The room had been finished for sometime, waiting for them to return from the hospital with their son. Instead, this room sat empty, and Quinn hadn't found the strength to really go in there besides the first night home where she sat down in the rocking chair by the window and hugged the stuffed whale they had bought, and simply hung her head down, her chest aching as she completely lost it sobbing knowing this room would never hear the cries of their baby.

The changing table and crib never being used, the adorable clothing never to be dressed in, the stuffed animals, rattles, and sea decorations left t simply collect dust. This was a tomb, not the room Joe and her had filled and decorated so happy and hopeful. She froze, seeing him packing everything away before her eyes widened and she shook her head.

"What are you doing?!"

Joe sighed, looking a little caught off guard having her walked in on him doing this.

"Quinn..."

Quinn stared at all of the boxes before she marched in, furious.

"What are you doing?! These are his things!"

She roughly snatched the box out of hands, grabbing it and throwing it down. Staring, chest heaving she suddenly felt beyond overwhelmed. The reality of her baby being born dead hit her again like a pile of bricks. Her heart hammered, her stomach turned, and furious tears filled her eyes.

"You...didn't...ask me...you just...were...gonna get rid of everything..."

Her words started breaking up as tears continued falling from her wide heartbroken eyes. Sighing, Joe stared at her, knowing he had to be careful with his words.

"Baby...I'm not getting rid of anything. I'm donating everything. Some stuff I'm packing up and putting in the attic. I just know how hard this is walking past this room. We can turn it into your office until it's safe again to start trying again."

Quinn shook her head, twisting her hands together, before she felt her chest starting to dully ache as she began pace. Letting her hands go, she started pulling at her hair, making it stick up as she started to break down and cry. Joe watched helpless as she shook all over.

"Quinn..."

Quinn turned and looked at him.

"He's dead! He's really dead isn't he?"

Joe sighed, looking completely heartbroken himself as he stared at her.

"I'm so sorry baby..."

Quinn bowed her head, shaking all over before let out a haggard cry, completely devastated.

"I know we'll start trying again like you said...but...this was our baby, our son. It's like...we're packing everything away and pretending he never existed. I don't want us to forget about him...I..."

She couldn't go any further. Instead her knees buckled as she collapsed on the carpet floor, completely losing it as she bowed her head, and broke down crying until finally she felt Joe kneel down beside her. Gathering her in his arms, he held her tight, and she heard him cry with her.

"Quinn, I'm so sorry. I should have told you. I just know you've been through so much. I swear...I'll...no we'll never forget Nash. He was our son, and I never thought anything could hurt this bad. I keep praying, wishing I knew why this happened? I know we'll have another baby. I want to give you another baby, more than anything...but I know we need to wait. I would do anything to take this pain away from you...anything. We just need to keep praying, believing, and help each other though this. When the time comes for us to have another baby God will give us a sign. I know it. But..."

He pulled back, gently holding her face with his two hands, forcing her to look him in the eye. Both of their eyes bloodshot and filled with exhausted tears.

"We'll never forget about our son. I promise..."

With that, he leaned his forehead against hers and they stayed that way, eyes closed, settling down until finally Quinn crawled down, and laid her head in his lap. Sitting there in the middle of their son's nursery, gently stroking her hair before finally, he sadly smiled, and gently ran his thumb over her lips.

"I have an idea...wanna go for a ride?"

Turning slightly, Quinn who had calmed down stared up at him. A few hours later he convinced her to get out of the house. There they visited their son's grave, sitting in the grass, picking at the fresh grass that had just begun to grow there. They sat there, looking at the tiny headstone, before Quinn sighed. "What do you think he would have been like?" Joe stared at the headstone in deep thought, before sadly smiling.

"He would have been exactly how we thought he would be...the best."

Quinn sadly smiled nodding at this, before she laid herself back against the soft grass. Putting her hands above her head, she stared up at the thousands of sparking stars from above. Joe laid himself back down beside her. He still had his dreads back then, and they pooled down around him, some laying against her pooled back blond hair. Both laid there, before Quinn sighed, her heart aching.

"Which star do you think is his in Heaven?"

Joe squinted before he pointed up, his bracelets jingling as he did so.

"That one, right there..."

Quinn smirked, before lifting her own hand and pointing.

"That one?"

"Yeah, that's his...definitely."

Quinn smiled before they dropped their arms, and Quinn tried reaching for his hand to hold. Instead, she brushed up and gently hit the crotch of his jeans. Quinn raised an eyebrow, still staring up at the sky.

"Where's your hand?"

Joe, still looking at the sky himself reached and took her hand squeezing her hand.

"Here..."

Quinn bit down on her bottom lip and giggled.

"Did I just touch your..."

"Yeah..."

Both started laughing, still staring up at the sky. Truly laughing for the first time since all of this happened. For just a few moments, they weren't just laying right beside their unborn son's grave. At that exact moment they looked exactly as they did all those years ago when they first met. Innocent, and so full of hope. Finally once the giggles died down, Joe brought her hand, laced within his own and firmly kissed the top of it. Quinn sighed, still staring up at the twinkling stars.

"God I miss him. I would do anything to just hold him again..."

Joe sighed before rolling over and staring down at her, his long dreads hanging down, almost like a curtain around her face.

"I have an idea..."

**Later...**

Quinn smiled sadly in the tattoo shop's mirror in the back. This was her "third" tattoo since her coverup was finished, roses blooming, something that Joe had designed himself. After that she got Joe's name after they married, despite the looks her mother gave, remarking God forbid if they ever got divorced. Tonight both Joe and her got Nash's name tattooed on them. Larry, Joe's artist knew what had happened, and didn't make it weird at all. In fact, he only charged for one session, saying Quinn's was on the house. Before going in, Quinn had insisted on grabbing a drink at the mini-mart down the street down town. Joe, who rarely drank watched in amusement as she stepped out with her brown paper bag, tucking her debit card back into her purse. After the cemetery they had swung back to the house, before Joe called Larry to see if he could fit them in tonight.

Buying a cheap wine cooler, Quinn looked around, before heading to the alley and popping the cap. The only time Joe had drank was receiving communion at mass, or the the champagne they drank on their wedding. Joe wasn't completely against drinking, since his own parents enjoyed the occasionally bottle of wine with dinner. Still, he wasn't used to it, and on their honeymoon when Quinn convinced him to do a shot with her at the bar their first night, his puckered face was worth it as Quinn doubled over laughing. For the remainder of the honeymoon Joe didn't drink, but was highly amused when Quinn caught quite the buzz a few nights later after the two spend the entire evening dancing, and nearly fell on her face when she tried to undress in a frenzy when they returned to their room. Tipping the bottle back, Quinn smiled before offering him the bottle. Lightly chuckling, Joe shook his head.

"No thanks I'm all set."

"Where's your sense of adventure Mr. Hart?"

Joe smirked stepping forward, slipping his hands into the front pockets of Quinn's jeans and bringing her closer. With a giggle, Quinn was right on top of him, before taking another swing of her drink.

"Baby, every day with you is the real adventure."

Quinn laughed, raising her eyebrows as she took another swing. before wiping her mouth with the back of her sleeve.

"You got that right mister."

"You ready?"

Quinn finished the bottle, before lightly burping. Joe cracked up completely, before Quinn turned and tosses the bottle and brown paper bag back into the dumpster near them.

"Yep."

Linking arms, the two walked out of the alley and went straight to the shop where the loud buzzing from multiple tattoo guns filled the air. This was the same shop Quinn had Joe's name on her. She had sat with Joe for a few of his tattoos, and had always been fascinated by the meaning behind all of Joe's. Really when it came down to it, Joe's parents weren't exactly strict. They had strong beliefs, and had been sheltering their only son, but always had his best interest at heart, and really seemed like down to Earth hippies. She knew they had been a little nervous when she entered his life, but it didn't take long for them to see how much she truly cared about him. In the end Quinn had gotten Nash's name in beautiful script, in fact in Joe's handwriting, which she always admired and loved even back when they first met. He had written it down, and Larry simply copied it. Quinn always loved whenever Joe wrote cards to her, lyrics, poems or even love letters. Something about him writing instead of using email constantly seemed so old fashion and romantic. Joe said it was just something his mother had instilled into him about writing thank-you cars, or keeping in touch that way. For Quinn, she absolutely loved it. In fact, she loved his writing so much, she would always smile whenever she saw his handwriting on the chalk board in the kitchen that Quinn used to write lists for what they needed at the market or brief messages whenever one of them was out. Joe every once in awhile would doodle, or write little silly notes for Quinn to discover either first thing in the morning, or when she came home from work. As always they would bring a huge smile to her face. While she got it done she laid back, squeezing Joe's hand for comfort, actually not minding the scratching pain as the needle dragged down against her tender skin above her rib.

The entire time she laid back, staring at Joe's focused comforting eyes. Remembering all those years ago in physical therapy with him gently bending her legs, coaxing her on, and always staring down at her hypnotized. She remembered not that long ago him giving the same look down at her as their dead son was taken out of her in the delivery room. This time though, his eyes held back heartbreak as he never once looked away. Once it was over, Quinn hopped off the table admiring it, as Joe came behind her, carefully wrapping his arms around her, and pulling her close as he rested his chin on her shoulder. Staring at the two of them in the reflection of the mirror, she sadly smiled. They certainly did make quite the pair. Turning slightly, she kissed the side of his mouth, before Larry called Joe over and for his tattoo did an outline of a cross with the date that Nash had been born underneath. His took a little bit longer, but the entire time Quinn sat there, gently stroking Joe's hand as he didn't even flinch as Larry made small talk, updating them on a tattoo convention he had just gone to. Once they were done, the two headed home, their skin tender, their hearts still aching, but at least their minds now felt exhausted. They returned home, changed for bed, ignoring the pile of boxes down the hall in the nursery, and instead stayed in their master bedroom as they admired their swollen fresh tattoos in the mirror above Quinn's long dresser, before climbing into bed.

As always they prayed separately and silently. Joe's prayers always took a little bit longer but once he was done she felt him shift his body against her, making the sign of the cross, before slipping his arms around her. Quinn reached for the light, before asking if he needed to sleep on his other side because of his arm? Joe kissed the back of her neck and said he was fine, before both laid in darkness. They knew they still couldn't have sex, and in all honestly Quinn was relieved, she didn't think she was ready for that. Still, it felt so good to be held in her husband's arms.

"At the end of the month I'll get Sam to her me with the nursery, we'll box up whatever you wanna keep and turn it into a spare room again until..."

"We try again?"

"Yeah, whenever you're ready for that."

"Will you be?"

"Someday, but right now we need to grieve and allow ourselves to mourn. Trying again as quickly as possible isn't being rational. We know that now. We both need time to process this. It might take awhile, but God will give us a sign when it's time to start trying again."

"What if he never does? What if this happens again, or never at all? Maybe this was some sort of punishment..."

Joe held her tighter, kissing her earlobe.

"Shhhh, you know that isn't true..."

Quinn fought back tears staring into the darkness.

"I just...wish I could understand why this happened? Why would be want to take our baby? Is it because of what happened with Beth? Maybe I wasn't meant to be a mother..."

Joe held her tighter from behind.

"Don't ever say that. We might never understand why our son was taken from us...and the pain very well may never go away. We're allowed to be devastated, we're allowed to be confused and angry...but I believe as hard as it is, everything happens for a reason. God's very own only son died, and I'm sure questions very much like these were having had been having were asked. All I do know is if we still can love each other, and keep believing, we'll have our family someday, and our little boy will be with the angels watching us for the rest of our lives. I know we rather have him here...but knowing they are taking care of him and looking over him might be the only comfort I have besides you. No matter what happens Quinn, children or not...we'll have each other, and I thank God every night for that."

Quinn felt silent tears roll down her face as she sadly smiled.

"You...always seem to know what to say and make me feel better. Are you sure you aren't my guardian angel?"

She heard Joe slightly laugh, before lacing his hands into hers in front of her. Feeling grateful, Quinn smiled before feeling her husband's warm breath against the back of her neck as she allowed the comfort of sleep to over take her. Tonight had been had, but thanks to Joe it hadn't ended that way. She knew it might take awhile to build the courage to venture down the hall and face packing up and putting things away. She hated knowing she might very well never build up the nerve to actually go in there and face the fact that their beautiful baby boy would never use the crib they bought, or she would never nurse him in the rocking chair Mr. and Mrs. Schuester had bought for them.

No, this was just an empty room with a dresser filled with adorable baby clothes they would never be worn. It was a tomb, with nothing but reminders everywhere of how perfect and hopeful they were before that fateful appointment happened resulting in the Dr. Weathers informing her that their son no longer had a heartbeat. That somehow, at some time that tiny cyst broke, killing him in her womb where she believed he would be the safest. That he very well might have been dead the night before when Joe noticed he wasn't doing his usual kicks after she had sat down in front of the TV and drank her nightly apple juice which she had been craving. Constantly a million regrets and thoughts filled her head, wondering if there was anything she could have done to have made this not happen. Instead, Nash her baby boy was born dead, gray and lifeless, leaving an empty hole in her heart now. It was different than when she gave up Beth. This was a planned baby she wanted more than anything. This was supposed to be her real family.

She was an adult now, and everything was supposed to fall into place after she married Joe and saw what a one of a kind love she had with him. Now both had to mourn a baby that never got a chance to take a breath or even cry. You called a child who lost parents an orphan...but what did you call parents who lost a child? There wasn't any word for that because it was too horrifying to even think about. Laying there, she continued praying for a dreamless sleep since the first few days following the delivery to Nash she had been plagued with terrible heartbreaking nightmares. Ones where in the delivery room she would actually give birth to a living breathing, healthy baby, but as much as she begged the doctor wouldn't;t hand him over. The other was hearing loud crying from the nursery, but each time in this dream she would venture inside and look in the crib, no baby was found inside.

Each time she would snap awake, feeling wet sticky tears down her face, knowing even in sleep she couldn't escape this horrible pain.

**Present**

Two hours had passed and somehow in that brief time plans had been messed up and it seemed that Blaine and Kurt could come, and Rachel would try her hardest but it wasn't looking good. Everyone said had tried their best, including Tina but the times and date just didn't match up. Quinn felt partly relieved. She loved all of her friends, but the less people she had to deal with right now the better. She knew it wasn't healthy to isolate herself, but at this time she was hurting, and beyond worried about Joe. Her days were busy with the hospital, and having to worry about entertaining them, she couldn't really even think about it. She was barley keeping her head above water.

Instead she knew Sam would join them, and Blaine and Kurt would be a joy to have visit. Over the past year Quinn had grown close to the two of them, and somehow both had been beyond sweet and understanding what she was going through and constantly reminded her that she was in their thoughts. Let it be text messages, phone calls, emails, flowers and fruit baskets being sent. She knew they were trying anything to raise her spirits. Rachel was very much the same. She had been a new side to her after Finn died, and the two had bonded, and were closer than ever now despite how busy they were with their own life's. Still, she knew seeing just a few of her friends would be a nice little distraction, and not too overwhelming for Joe here. Laying there, she had been watching Joe sleep, staring at his pale face with his sharp facial features and never wanting more than to turn back time and fall in love with this man all over again. That's when suddenly his alarms to his heart monitor all began to go off loudly, making her jump as she stared down at him terrified.


	7. CPR and DNR

**Present**

"Code blue! Code blue!"

The intercom repeated as Quinn was pulled back by Jess, one of the nurses, struggling against her arms that held her back so the doctors could work. All of Joe's monitors and matches were loudly beeping, sounding off alarms that sounded deafening to Quinn as everything suddenly seemed to happen in mere seconds. Several nurses and the doctor on call, one of Joe's regulars Dr. Swayer came hurrying in. One of the nurses wheeled in a defibrillator machine, before another hurried in holding a clipboard.

"Stop! He signed a DNR!" Quinn who stood back felt everything so blank. Her stomach dropped, before her eyes widened in disbelief as well as outrage.

"WHAT?!"

This nurse, Alice Quinn believed was her name, stood holding the clipboard.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Hart he signed..."

Quinn ripped away from the other nurse's grip. The moment Joe's alarms went off, Quinn had jumped up frightened before all of the nurses came rushing in. Quinn was pulled away when she shook Joe by the shoulders, lightly tapping his pale face. "Joe? Joe?! Come on baby open your eyes...just open your eyes!" Now less than a minute later this was all happening. Hearing that Joe had signed a DNR was insane. She knew her husband, he would never leave her on purpose. She hated knowing that he was in fact dying, and they were simply on borrowed time. It killed her knowing she was losing him, and how at this point despite how hard he had fought with the treatments, he now simply wanted to spend whatever time he had left with her. That's why he was constantly doped up on pain meds. The doctors were simply making him comfortable so whatever time he had left he wasn't in constant pain.

Quinn had exhausted looking for a cure, and now was left with zero options besides spending endless days watching her handsome, kind, and loving husband become thinner and weaker as he wasted away. It absolutely killed her. She hated it. Now here she stood, in the hospital room Joe had called home for all these months, and she just learned that someway, somehow he had signed a DNR without even telling her. No, this had to be some kind of mistake, she didn't believe it. For a fraction of a second she thought back to the summer following graduation. How that had been one of the happiest few weeks of her life and as she stood there, feeling as if a bucket of ice cold water was dumped on her, she suddenly remembered the day by the lake in mid June. Flashes of what happened went through her mind, remembering that this was the moment she knew for sure she was head over heels in love Joe. That day all those years ago, she knew for sure. Outraged, breaking out of this frozen hold, she screamed loud enough that everyone in the room turned, eyes wide and frightened. Staring at Dr. Swayer, her lips curled back like an animal as she raced over to Joe's bed.

"BRING HIM BACK! TRY DAMNIT! I DON'T CARE WHAT THAT SAYS! DO IT NOW!"

The nurse, Alice holding the clipboard suddenly looked very frightened as she gulped.

"Mrs. Hart we..."

Quinn turned on her like an animal. She glared, before turning and grabbing a handful of Dr. Swayer's scrubs.

"HELP HIM!"

She screamed, spittle flying from her mouth. Dr. Swayer was a good man, and from their church. He knew Quinn and Joe, and suddenly as torn as he seemed, he looked at Quinn's furious crazed face and knew he needed to act fast. He stared down at her, the monitors still loudly beeping as Quinn's crazed expression seemed to falter for a moment. Her lip quivered, as she stared at him completely helpless.

"Please...help him..."

Tears filled her eyes before Dr. Swayer stared down, pity showing in his own face. Instantly he sang into action. Nodding, he waved to the nurses.

"Screw the DNR, get that defibrillator over here stat!"

Alice looked ready to say something, but was nearly knocked down as the nurses wheeled over the machine. Dr. Swayer pulled up Joe's shirt, showing his pale tattoo covered thin chest. Joe's eyes were still closed, as his heart monitor continued to flatline. His blood pressure dropping fast. Dr. Swayer motioned to one of the nurses to grab an oxygen pump, and instructed her to place it over her nose and mouth. Counting, the nurse began to pump pain into Joe, before Dr. Swayer laced his hands together and began pumping up and down in steady hard motions.

"One, two, three, four five..."

The nurse was in sync with him, pumping oxygen as Dr. Swayer continued to press down on Joe's chest. Quinn stood back horrified, none of the nurses having the courage to lead her away. Even the nurse named Alice didn't say a word, too stunned to even move from where she stood. The monitors showed no change, the line still giving a hollow sound, as the line continued to stay flat. Watching the numbers go down. Quinn stood there, tears rushing down her face, everything in her mind going blank besides on sentence repeating over and over...

"I'm not ready to lose him. Not yet, please God not yet!"

That's when Dr. Swayer got the paddles ready.

"Charging to 500!"

Quinn had only seen this kind of stuff in the movies. In reality it was downright terrifying when you were watching it get done on your loved one. The nurses worked fast, putting the markers down, as the machine's light went from red, to orange, to yellow, and finally green.

"CLEAR!"

He pressed the paddles down in position, before pressing them down hard against Joe's chest. The sound was silent, but Joe's entire body twitched by the zap. Quinn couldn't stand it, she stood back, staring at her husband, feeling her mind slowly snap at the very thought that Joe was dead. Instead, Dr. Swayer swore under his breath and snapped at the nurse near the machine.

"CHARGE TO 500 DAMNIT!"

The nurse pressed the button and for a lifetime it slowly turned from red, to orange, to yellow, and finally green. Feeling ready to scream or vomit, Quinn stood at the edge of the bed, staring at Joe as Dr. Swayer and pressed the paddles down.

"CHARGE!"

Joe's body twitched, and this time Quinn nearly screamed with relief when the heart monitor gave a tiny blip, as the line peaked up for a second. The entire room held their breath, as they looked at the screen. Dr. Swayer who was now sweating badly nodded, a determined half smile on his face.

"Good boy Joe, come on now!"

Nodding, Dr. Swayer motioned to the nurse who had been in charge of charging the defibrillator.

"Charge to 500 again!"

The nurse nodded, and pressed the button as it went from red...to orange...to yellow...to green.

Quinn squeezed her hands together, silently begging God to not take her Joe yet. She wasn't ready. Just then Dr. Swayer placed the paddles against Joe's chest and Quinn watched anxiously as his body twitched and suddenly a steady beeping noise filled the air as everyone turned and stared at the heart monitor. The heart line started going up and down at a steady pattern as his blood pressure's numbers began going back to a normal, slowly climbing.

"We got a pulse!"

One of the nurses yelled. Dr. Swayer nodded before he put the paddles down, laced his hands together and began to gently give Joe CPR. The other nurse continued to pump the oxygen over Joe's nose and mouth, as Dr. Swayer continued to count, pumping in steady rhythms before finally Joe's heart rate returned to normal. Dr. Swayer looked flushed, as well as exhausted. Smiling, he breathed a sigh of relief, before stepping back he put his hands on his hips. He began to instruct the nurses on what exactly to do now. Another nurse came in, hooking Joe up on oxygen, as Dr. Swayer turned at Quinn who stood at the end of Joe's bed, transfixed, looking like she was about to drop at any second. Her eyes were still huge and bloodshot. Absently, she continued twisting her hands together as she stared at her husband. The nurses lowered his shirt, watching as one attached a new IV, and the other hooked Joe up to oxygen.

His eyes were still closed, and his face extremely pale, but nevertheless he was alive, and that's all that mattered. Dr. Swayer sighed, stepping forward, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Quinn, you should sit down..."

Quinn, who's eyes were completely filling with tears, turned and looked at him.

"We...almost lost him...he...almost died...oh my god he almost died!"

Her face crumpled, before Dr. Swayer put his arms around her, holding her tight.

"Shhhh, its okay. He's okay, he's stabilized he's going to be fine..."

Quinn pulled back, staring at her husband, face crumpling.

"Oh my God..."

She went to Joe, kneeling by his bedside, gathering up one of his hands, pressing it against her tear soaked face. Dr. Swayer walked up behind her, gently placing his hand on her shoulder.

"We knew this was going to happen, it might be more often. His heart is too weak now Quinn."

Quinn turned sniffling.

"What about the DNR?"

Dr. Swayer sighed before shaking his head.

"This is the first time I heard abut it. Must have been with Dr. Loftmore or Green. Quinn listen it's probably..."

Quinn shook her head, feeling as if the world was spinning. Lowering her head, she kissed Joe's hand, her chest rattling as a full blown panic attack began to settle upon her. Feeling faint, she continued squeezing Joe's hand, never feeling more distraught than she did at this exact moment. She sat there, fighting back tears before she raised her face and looked at Dr. Swayer who seemed concerned.

"He'll wake up, he just needs to rest. Don't be angry with him honey. He's in pain...I'm sure he wasn't thinking how it would hurt you. He's absolutely crazy about you, and he worries so much. He knows how awful it's been for the two of you...just...let him rest then sit down and calmly and hear what he has to say."

Quinn turned, staring at her husband looking so frail and weak. The oxygen tube going in, his face turned slightly, his long eyelashes laying against his cheeks. Looking at him, she could still see her husband, remembering how the second she laid eyes on him at the God Squad meeting something different happened to her. It wasn't a feeling she had before with Finn, Puck, or Sam. No, this was completely different. Her heart hammered as he introduced himself, talking about how he was homeschooled. Staring at him with his tattoos and sandals, she couldn't help but find him extremely attractive, as well as charming. Her stomach fluttered as did her chest as she smiled and remarked.

"He's like a teen Jesus..."

Seven years weren't enough. She wanted a lifetime. Dr. Swayer helped her up and pulled the comfortable chair up to the bed.

"I know I can't talk you until going home, so let me at least give you something to relax."

Quinn shook her head, even though she felt out of sorts, scared, and angry.

"No..."

Dr. Swayer gently squeezed her hand.

"He's going to be fine and closely monitored, but we'll let you stay. I can fetch a cot..."

Quinn shook her head, still staring at Joe and squeezing his hand.

"No, I'll be fine."

"I'm giving you a shot, it won't make you sleep but help you relax. He'll probably sleep through the night too. We'll have the night nurses do ten minute checks and he's hooked up again, pulse is strong and steady, and blood pressure stabilized. Just rest okay?"

Quinn nodded, using her free hand to wipe her puffy raw eyes. She thanked Dr. Swayer, before he came back, with a filled syringe. Quinn rolled up her sleeve, and didn't even flinch when she was injected. Dr. Swayer took a blanket from the top of the closet and wrapped it around Quinn who still held tightly onto Joe's hand as if he would drift away and disappear if she let go for even a second. Dr. Swayer said he could come in once he was done his rounds and check in on them. Quinn then looked up, eyes looking just like that of a scared frightened child.

"Thank you...for saving Joe's life...legally I know..."

Dr. Swayer shook his head.

"Don't worry. I know you won't sue me or take me to court. But you two need to have a serious talk sooner than later. I'm not trying to scare you, but this could happen sooner than later. If it happens again, I can't ignore a legal document...and if it happens with another doctor they won't think twice, Joe loves you Quinn, you're his whole world...but I think he did this because he's suffering. This is a horrible disease that eats away at you. His body is weak, and he doesn't want this drawn out and have you suffer yourself. Talk with him, but don't be upset...it will only make matters worse okay?"

Sighing, Quinn could all ready feel the shot kicking in. Nodding, she stared up, her eyes defeated. Thanking him one last time, Dr. Swayer patted her arm and walked out. Fixing the blanket around her shoulders, she suddenly felt freezing despite the fact it was a beautiful May evening outside. Sitting up straight, she continued holding Joe's hand, staring at him feeling as if any second she would either break down completely sobbing, or simply scream in frustration over what had happened. Her chest aching, she figured she could give her mom or Joe's parents a call, but she knew it would just make matters worse. She would give them a call tomorrow, until then all she wanted to do was sit here and watch her husband, and pray that he would wake up so she could just ask him why? Why would he sign a DNR without telling her. But she knew why... She knew she wouldn't have been able to let him go.

**Before...**

It was three days after everyone said goodbye to Rachel at the train station. Finn was set to leave at the end of the week, and had been walking around in a trance since he let her "go" to follow her dreams. Rachel was set to return next Tuesday after spending the next six days looking at dorms, as well as touring the school and city with her two dads. Finn was making sure he would be gone before she returned. That afternoon when he saw her off with everyone else, they all went and grabbed pizza. Here Finn sat next to Mr. Schuester in the restaurant not saying much, just staring down at his barley eaten slice while everyone else was happily buzzing about, excited for their last summer of carefree fun before the reality of life started setting in. Quinn would be leaving for New Haven Connecticut the first week in August, which meant she would be leaving her life behind here, along with her friends, mother, and Joe. Joe and her became "official" the night of prom. The weeks that followed between that and Nationals were unlike anything she had ever experienced before. She felt like she was floating on a cloud. The night before nationals she had been high on the excitement and thrill of what was at stake, and had shown Joe her breasts.

She was giddy with excitement, and had never been so turned on before. She pulled down her T-shirt that Joe gave her, along with her sports bra. She couldn't believe his reaction and absolutely loved it. She had promised to go slow with him since he was strict with his beliefs, and she cared about him too much to push him into something he would regret. That night after she returned to the hotel room, she received a text from Joe as she headed straight into the bathroom to brush her teeth and take her contacts out while the girls were all spread out all over the massive hotel room, laughing, and watching Mean Girls which was being shown on TV. Quinn went into the bathroom, opening the text and instantly smiled.

_**Man oh Man. I'm definitely going to have to pray extra hard tonight. That was the first...well, girl I've seen like that before. You're absolutely beautiful. I'll see you tomorrow. 3**_

Quinn smiled, but knew she needed to slow things down. The last thing she wanted was to make Joe uncomfortable and lose him. No, instead she would slow things down, but see how far she could get without pressing her luck. The next morning when she spotted him downstairs at breakfast, she was relieved to see him smiling, and waving her over having saved her a seat. She sat down, and she handed her a glass of orange juice.

"Order this for you, the waitress is coming over in a few. You sleep good?"

Quinn nodded, tucking back a lose strand of blond hair behind her ear. She looked around at how excited the energy was around the table. Everyone was laughing, talking, and chatting a mile a minute. Taking the glass she sipped the sweet tasing juice before smiling and set it down. Turning, she stared at him.

"Yeah. Listen, about last night..."

She lowered her voice so nobody could hear, not that anyone could from the volume of everyone talking and not paying attention. Joe's cheeks turned a shade of red, as his eyes widened looking at her.

"Oh...listen its alright..."

Quinn shook her head.

"No it's not. I slept on it, and I couldn't believe how forward and inappropriate that was. I guess...I'm just really attracted to you, and I was excited last night and...well...it wasn't very lady like I guess. I put you in a very uncomfortable situation. I'm sorry."

Joe looked around, seeing that nobody was listening and kept his voice down just low enough for her to hear.

"Don't apologize. Do you hear me? Don't. Believe me Quinn...I'm having feelings I've never experienced before. Trust me, ever since we became boyfriend girlfriend I've been fighting temptation and you have been more than patient. I've been praying, and...talking to my priest. He said it's perfectly normal for a guy my age to have these sorts of 'feelings'. I'm too embarrassed to talk about it to my parents. I've been talking to Sam..."

He motioned with his head and for a second Quinn glanced back over her shoulder and looked at Sam sitting on the other end of the long table, making Mercedes laugh as it sounded like he was doing another impression. Turning back, Quinn raised an eyebrow.

"Really?"

Joe smirked.

"Yeah. I know you guys dated, but he's a Christian just us. Remember that day durning physical therapy when...you know you felt..."

Quinn blushed herself and giggled softly before nodding.

"Yeah, I remember..."

"Yeah well...I went to talk with Sam. I knew he would understand and it broke it down simple for me. the Bible was written so long ago, there seems to be temptation everywhere. Things are much more complicated. They talk about sins of the flesh in the Bible over and over again, still...I know we're good people, and what we're feeling is natural. It's just...I can't go all the way yet, even if we win Nationals...I'm sorry..."

Quinn reached and rubbed his arm, enjoying how firm it felt beneath her arm.

"Oh Joe I'm sorry. I swear I wasn't trying to rush you into anything. I shouldn't have..."

Joe shook his head and leaned over, pressing his forehead against hers. Instantly she knew what this meant. They loved each other, and this was how they showed it. Smiling, Quinn took a deep breath. Joe stared at her, and both locked eyes, less than an inch away.

"Last night after you...you know..."

Quinn smirked as Joe sat back a little, and nervously looked around again, triple checking to make sure nobody was listening. Lowering his voice even more as he sighed.

"I...went into the bathroom back in the room and took a shower and...well...masturbated for the first time really ever and...actually finished."

Quinn could tell he was devastated as well as embarrassed saying this, as if he was confessing that he had done something so horrible he could barley say it above a whisper. Quinn felt awful for him before gently cupping the side of his face, gently she made tiny circular motions with her thumb against his soft skin.

"Joe, it's alright...that's perfectly normal..."

Joe dropped his eyes for a moment and kept talking, struggling as he got the words out.

"We were taught that doing that is sinful, I've touched myself down there a few times, curious...wondering how it worked. I was comfortable with my parents, I had the sex talk with them, but they always said once I was married I could explore my wife's body, nothing else, never into full detail. I was really walking in the dark since...I got my first..."

He looked around again, blushing even harder as he whispered the next word...

"Erection. The temptation really was never there as the years went on. I knew it felt good when I touched my penis, but never really explored my body. before since I never was exposed to anything. Then I started getting those feelings after we started hanging out. I tried to ignore them, but last night..."

His eyes drifted to her breasts for a moment before dropping them again, looking ashamed. After a second, he lifted his eyes and stared at her.

"I...had never seen somebody so beautiful. I went in the shower...and suddenly I looked down and it was sticking right up. It actually hurt it was so hard. I couldn't stop thinking about you so I did what the guys talked about in the locker room. I just wrapped my hand around it and...well suddenly it felt amazing, the best I've ever felt before in my whole life. All I could keep thinking about was you...and then...I finished. I had to bite down on my bottom lip from crying out. Thankfully the running water in the shower and the TV playing muffled the noise. I felt dizzy like I was going to pass out. It was...insane. As soon as it was over, I looked down at my thighs, and the mess I left as the water was washing it away. That's when...the guilt came. I didn't feel dirty doing that I did. Instead...I just felt like I had done something terrible. I prayed last night...prayed longer than I ever had in my entire life, and all I know is that I want to win nationals, and try and be the best boyfriend I can be to you. I don't want to disappoint you, and I don't want to waste your time. I agree...we can do stuff, but I can't go all the way with you. My fate is very important to me, but so aren't you. I believe in sex after marriage, but...if we can trust each other maybe you can help me. I can't stop thinking of what it would be like being right against you...to feel what I felt last night...I just..."

Quinn smiled playing with one of his dreads, which became one of her favorite things to do whenever she got nervous. Joe joked that these worked better than a rabbit's foot. Nodding, she stared at him.

"We'll go slow...we'll go at any pace you want. I'm not walking away from this Joe. You're the best thing to ever happen to me."

Joe cracked a smile staring at her.

"You serious?"

Quinn nodded before smiling and kissing his forehead. Joe smiled before he stared at her.

"If we win nationals I do...wanna see you...all of you."

Quinn laced her hands into his, her small slender fingers, inter webbed with his larger ones. Giggling, she cocked her head.

"I would love to see all of you too."

"We just gotta go slow, I'm sure you can show me there are things we can do without...you know...doing 'it'."

Quinn pressed her forehead against his again and smiled.

"Oh absolutely."

Laughing the two kissed, and after breakfast when began rehearsing. They even skipped lunch and ate in the hotel with a few of the others, determined to focus on getting the steps right. When the others returned, Mercedes was sick from food poisoning and Quinn was informed she would have to join the group as one of the main dancers and signers for the second number. Instantly panic filled her as Quinn suddenly became terrified believing she wasn't good enough and couldn't be up front and center. Joe reassured her she had this, and spent the rest of the afternoon watching her, and helping her practice the steps over and over and over again. Even when some of the guys started fighting, Joe helped break it up, before standing back after Mr. Schuester calmed everyone down as they went back to practicing. Joe stood back, watching Quinn closely. That night before they went on, Joe squeezed her hands, and both pressed their foreheads against each other as they prayed together. Opening their eyes, they smiled before they gently kissed and took their places.

That night, they won Nationals and everything seemed to fall into place. That next week was amazing, and Quinn couldn't stop smiling. She remembered Joe lifting her up and spinning her around on stage after it was announced they were the winners. She squealed with delight as he kissed her and hugged her tighter than anyone had ever hugged her before. It was completely perfect. Those days flew by with parties, celebrations, and Quinn falling further and further in love with Joe. She went to a BBQ at Joe's house and couldn't stop smiling watching how they were around their only son. She could clearly see how much they loved him. The night of graduation happened, and Quinn and Joe made true on their promise to each other. Since then, she really couldn't stop smiling. The whole gang met up at Coy's pond that morning. They picked this pond since the beach had easy access, and Arnie had a special wheelchair his mother had gotten him with large rubber tires and a motor that made it easier for him to move around and go over sand. His mother brought him, along with Sugar who had tons of beach chairs donated of course by her father along with a volleyball net, and two umbrellas, and Rory who was set to leave for Ireland in just a few more weeks. Tina, and Mike brought food, coolers upon coolers packed with stuff from Tina's cousin who worked at the local deli. Santana and Brittany brought speakers, and their iPod to hook up for music. Mercedes and Sam came together, bringing Finn who seemed completely out of sorts. Puck tagged along, and Blaine and Kurt came bringing their own fold out beach chairs, and iced coffees. Quinn picked Joe up, and the second he saw her wearing her striped bathing suit, with shorts, she could have sworn his eyes popped out of his head as he got into her car. He wore black and gray board shorts, and a baggy black T-shirt on top. His dreads were tied back, and he had his sandals on. Whistling, he smiled before sitting down, setting down his backpack.

"Looking good Fabray!"

Quinn giggled, her hair tied in a tight ponytail, her skin a beautiful golden cream color, her sunglasses sitting perfectly on top of her head. Joe smirked, before leaning over and kissing her cheek. Sitting back, Joe smirked looking her up and down. She knew he was thinking back on when they both undressed in front of each other the night of graduation and showed each other what their bodies looked like. She remembered feeling so excited for Joe, watching him look at her with childlike wonder, his eyes wide as he took in the entire view, staring at her body as she felt embarrassed for the stretch marks she faintly had from Beth. She had bounced back quickly in shape, but this was the first time she was completely naked in front of a guy in years. She remembered him staring at her looking hypnotized, before he slowly pulled down his boxers. It was now Quinn's job to look surprised. She felt her heart pound, as he carefully stepped out of them, and covered his crotch with both hands. They had carefully planned this, and had met up at Quinn's house that night. They had gone to several different graduation parties, making the rounds, the last stop being Joe's. Quinn's mother was actually on a date tonight and wouldn't be home until much later.

Joe had driven Quinn home, knowing what they had planned was coming up. The entire day it had weighed on both of their minds. The whole time they had held hands, and kept smiling whenever they introduced themselves as boyfriend and girlfriend. Of course it had been brought up with Joe being younger and two years behind Quinn. They kept repeating the same answers that they were doing the long distance thing, that Quinn had all ready bought a train pass for the fall so Joe and her could travel back and forth and see each other whenever they wanted. Quinn hated it, but she could tell just by the look on Joe's face, he actualy seemed bothered whenever they kept bringing up Quinn going away. They had barley really sat down and talked about it, and had made a rough game plan, agreeing they wanted to give this a try despite the distance, and how busy Quinn would be starting school, but both knew they wanted to at least try. When Quinn confessed her guilt at one point, Joe wouldn't hear of it. He told her how proud he was of her, and how insanely happy he was of her and that he never wanted to hear her question her future. Finally she started to relax. With her mother not due home until much later, the two had climbed the stairs, two at a time, before entering her bedroom. Quinn still remembered when he first stepped foot in her bedroom. She remembered him nervously staring in, standing in the doorway, arms crossed as she went to go touch up her eyeliner and lipgloss.

He gazed around with his wide hazel eyes, looking more brown than ever, with a tiny sparkle of green. eying him, standing in front of her vanity, applying her lipgloss she smirked, loving how curious and nervous he seemed being upstairs in her bedroom.

"You can come in you know."

Joe still staring up at the light colored walls, her bed, and her cheerleading trophies. Hesitating he came in, still looking around in complete wonder. Quinn watched him smiling, knowing this was probably the first girl's room he had ever stepped foot in. She remembered when she first came to his house, and how much she loved looking around herself, staring at everything. Now less than two months later here they were. It was the night of graduation, and after the nonstop parade of appearing at BBQs, and parties around town, here they were. Joe took a deep breath, looking more nervous than he did when they all got into position before Nationals for Dashboard Light. She remembered her stomach fluttering, knowing her track record for these shows weren't always the best. She was completely terrified, standing in place before her eyes drifted over and saw Joe. He looked just as scared as she was, but as if he knew she was staring at him from across the way, he lifted his eyes and stared at her. Right away he lipped the words...

"I love you."

Quinn smiled and lipped the back...

"I love you too." He grinned, and just then the lights dimmed, and the music began. Now here they were. Both standing across from each other. He was sixteen, she was just about to turn eighteen. Here they were, national champions, she had graduated with high honors, and now set to go to her dream school, and prove to everyone that had turned on her when she got pregnant with Beth, and she had a future, a successful happy one, and fantasized about being able to show everyone just how far she really did go in life. As of right now the only things she knew she would miss would be her mother, her friends, and of course Joe. Quinn took a deep breath and let her arms drop. One hand that been partly covering down below, keeping her legs tightly held together. Her other arm, draped across her breasts. Now seeing him, standing there she smiled feeling as if she was on a rollercoaster, dropping at full speed, her stomach going up into her throat, as her heart hammered loudly, and the tiny hairs on her arms stood up as her skin broke out into goosebumps. Dropping her arms, she stared at him and saw as his eyes got as big as saucers. Quinn smiled before any second thoughts of her body drifted away as Joe smiled, looking so sincere.

"You're perfect."

Quinn out of habit was ready to roll her eyes, and laugh it off by putting herself down and saying something along the lines of

_"Yeah right, far from it." _

Instead, she simply stood there smiling, knowing he truly meant it, and at that exact moment, Quinn really did feel beautiful. She felt the most overwhelming feeling take over her. It was a settle happiness that settled over her like a warm embrace. She had been high before, twice during her little mini breakdown, as well as drunk several times in the past. None of those moments held a candle to this natural high and buzz. She knew it was cheesy to say love, but she honestly believed it. Joe stared at her, his eyes slowly tracing all the way up. He stared at her, before stopping at her breasts. She was thankful that even after having Beth they still remained perky and smooth. Standing there, she loved feeling this kind of power over him. Before he suddenly looked uncomfortable as he closed his eyes for a moment and breathed deeply. She knew he was getting an erection, and was trying everything within his power not to let this happen. He stood there, before Quinn reached down, ready to see if he would flinch. Instead, he watched as she took his wrist, and made his hands leave his crotch, where his penis sprang up.

He had a mass of hair down there, but staring down she saw his penis was actually really big, much bigger than Puck's. It was at least seven inches, and was sticking up almost touching his flat stomach. She saw the swollen tip, and as she stared down, still holding his hands, their arms like a draw bridge, she tilted her head and stared at it. Right away thought of what it would feel like to have that buried deeply inside of her, aroused her so badly she actually gulped hard, hearing a click in her throat. Joe blushed, looking embarrassed.

"Sorry..."

Quinn raised her eyes, staring at him.

"Don't be...that's natural. In fact...I feel pretty good about myself that I made that happen."

Joe smiled before Quinn stared at him, before she moved closer, feeling Joe stiffen as she gently wrapped her arms around his waist, bringing him closer towards her as she stood there and rested her head against his chest. Faintly she could hear his heartbeat. Slowly, his own hands wrapped around her, firmly pressing against her back. There the two stood completely naked, in each other's arms not saying a word. He rested his chin on the top of her head, as they stood there, gently swaying to absolutely no music, just each other. Finally, after what seemed like forever, Joe pulled back and stared at her.

"I love you so much Quinn, I don't wanna lose you."

Quinn raised an eyebrow and smiled.

"Trust me, you're not. We talked about this. We're going to make it work. You'll have the train pass, and so won't I. We'll take turns visiting each other...I told you...it's going to be hard work but I promise you it will be worth it."

"What if you meet someone? Some football player from a wealthy family, someone who...can...satisfy you?"

"I don't want that...all I want is you Joe. I've done the whole jock thing, and believe me...it isn't what it's cracked up to me. I should be the one who's nervous. You're gorgeous, and talented, and kind...any girl would throw themselves at you."

Joe snorted, rolling his eyes.

"Thanks for trying to make me fee better, but...girls don't notice me. They think I'm a freak. I actually get made fun of more than you. I try to lead by example and turn the other cheek like it says in the Bible, but it's hard. I've seen the looks we've been getting in the halls once people knew we were together. I don't care, I feel like the luckiest guy alive...it's just...you're going off to this great school, you shouldn't feel like I'm holding you back."

Quinn let go of Joe's waist and brought them up to Joe's face. Gently she held his face, reaching up and stared at him.

"You aren't...I'm serious Joe. I'm crazy about you."

"Do you still feel that way...with me...not being able to go all the way with you? Trust me Quinn...I want you...more than ever. Right now nothing else sounds better than laying you back on your bed, and being inside of you. I'm not even sure how I would do it. I've talked with Sam, and overheard the guys in the locker room but I really don't even think I'll be any good..."

"That's crap..."

"No I mean it. But, I need to stay true to my faith, it's such a huge part of my life, I'm just so scared I'm going to lose you...you're everything to me. I meant it when you said we do stuff...as long as it's not...'it'."

"Like...this?"

She reached down and very gently wrapped her hand around his penis, enjoying the warmth that pulsed from it. Instantly Joe looked as if somebody had punched the air straight out of him. Eyes widening, his mouth formed a perfect shaped 'O' as he began to breathe heavily, as Quinn knew this was a very fragile moment with Joe. She knew he was torn between his lust, and need of being a teenage boy, to being a good Christian, and following his beliefs even if they were dated and old fashion. She was grateful Sam had been talking to him. She was happy despite how she treated him throughout their relationship, that he was willing to help Joe out as a combination of a friend and even brother. He liked Joe, and from what she had heard was trying to let him understand that having sex, and exploring your body wasn't a sin. Still, she knew it would take time, and tiny steps like this was the way to convince him.

"Quinn..."

He said barley above a whisper. Sweat started to bead off his forehead, as he stared down at her, a strange twinge of color floating in his eyes, almost as if they were glazed over. She knew this look, they ere dilated, and it meant he was extremely turned on. He was stiff like a board, and his nostrils flared as he stared down at her. Quinn locked eyes with him, enjoying this as she very slowly started to move her hand up and down, up and down, up and down on his shaft. She felt the tip become slick with pre-cum, as she continued jerking him off. Her hand moved like lighting, going up and down, the sound of her hand, moving against his skin filled the room as Joe suddenly, less than a minute from when she began snapped his eyes shut, looking almost as if he was in pain. Pressing his forehead agaisnt hers, turning slightly as he cried out and Quinn felt his penis twitch, before he roughly orgasmed right into her hand, shooting warm ropy strings of cum out. It dripped through Quinn's fingers, and down her hand. Standing there, Quinn suddenly felt on top of the world. Joe looked flushed, as well as embarrassed as he swayed, and then looked down at the mess he had made. Instantly he looked horrified.

"Oh no...I'm so sorry..."

He harshly whispered, before Quinn laughed and shook her head.

"This is what's supposed to happen. You finished. That's exactly what I wanted..."

Stepping away, she walked over to her laundry basket her mother had brought up earlier for her where several facecloths were and took one. Wiping her hands, she handed it to him, as he was back to covering himself, looking more embarrassed than ever. Taking the facecloth, he smirked, blushing as he wiped his hands, before looking down at his thighs. Reaching down, he wiped his legs quickly before Quinn strolled over.

"I would offer to jump in the shower, but I have a feeling you might not be comfortable..."

Joe smirked, still blushing.

"Yeah, sorry...listen Quinn...that was..."

"Amazing?"

Joe laughed, looking down.

"Yeah."

Quinn took the facecloth and shot it into her hamper near her closet. Smiling, she sighed before draping her arms again loosely around his neck.

"How did that feel?"

"Amazing..."

"You don't feel guilty do you?"

Joe sighed, before raising his eyes and staring at her.

"Honestly?"

"A little..."

"Remember, we're going at our own pace. Whatever you're comfortable with. That's all that matters. Being a good Christian comes down to what kind of person you are to yourself and others. If you asked me...you're amazing. You deserve to feel good. If I ever go too far you tell me, trust me I won't take offense."

Joe nodded as he leaned down and quickly kissed her.

"I promise."

They stood there still naked, their arms still around each other, when Joe raised an eyebrow.

"That couldn't have done that much for you though..."

"Don't worry about me, how about this?"

She reached up, taking his hand before reaching down and placing it on her left breast. Yet again Joe's eyes widened, for a brief second looking as if he was ready to yank his hand away, before Quinn's own hand gently placed over his hand which covered the smooth mound of soft flesh. Feeling his palm against her nipple, she sighed, feeling tingling build all the way up from down below to right up to her eyes, which were currently seeing stars. Joe seemed fascinated as he stared down, and moved his hand around her breast, feeling it with his hand gently. Quinn smiled before she tilted her head and surprised him by kissing him. Smiling through the kiss, Joe laughed as their mouths opened and closed, their tongues flickering against each other. Finally they pulled away breathless when Joe sighed. "I better go..." Quinn nodded, before kissing him one last time.

"Yeah, before we end up having to head to give our confession tonight for midnight mass."

Joe laughed and together the two grabbed their clothes and slowly dressed. Once their clothes were back on, both stood there smiling. Quinn giggled.

"Different now that we've seen each other naked now huh?"

Joe laughed before nodding.

"Yeah, I guess so."

Quinn walked over, before staring at him.

"I hope you were comfortable with tonight Joe, I can't stress enough I don't want to make you feel like..."

Stepping forward, Joe pressed his finger against Quinn's lip before smirking. Knowing she was overthinking, she giggled before making a face.

"Got it, sorry."

Joe leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"I got something for you, I originally planned on giving it to you after the ceremony but things got so crazy..."

He grabbed his button down blue work shirt he wore on top of his T-shirt and opened up one of the front pockets. With that, he took out a thin black box. Smiling nervously, he turned and handed it to her.

"Happy graduation Quinn."

Quinn took the box, holding it in her hands before she smiled, staring up at him looking guilty.

"Joe...I didn't get you anything..."

Joe made a face and laughed, tucking one of his dreads behind his ear.

"I didn't graduate remember? Plus...you sorta just gave me something just now."

Quinn cracked up, making Joe laugh with her before she took the box, and turned it over opening it. There laid a beautiful copper charm bracelet with tiny little charms, including a Q and a J. Staring at it, Quinn's thin fingertips gently lifted the bracelet up, letting the charms dangle as she closely started at it. There was a heart, a star, the Yale crest, a cheerleading pom-pom, and her birthstone. Staring at it, she raised her eyes in complete disbelief. Joe stared down at her nervously.

"You like it?"

"Joe...this is gorgeous...you shouldn't have..."

Joe smiled taking it, undoing the clasp, before taking her left hand and gently putting it on. Slowly, she turned her hand, looking at the dangling charms, before she smiled, tears of happiness filling her eyes.

"This is the most beautiful bracelet I've ever seen...thank you Joe...I love it."

Leaning over, she grasped his face, pulling him down and firmly kissing him as hard as she could.

"I got you something else...but it's for your eyes only got it?"

Quinn raised an eyebrow and laughed lightly.

"Oh yeah?"

Joe looked off to the side, blushing again before he reached into the same pocket and produced a small photo. Handing it over, Quinn looked down before she felt the biggest smile spread across her face. The photo was of Joe, but it looked professionally done. The background was gray, and Joe's dreads were pulled back. He wore the torn jeans she loved, and the very same blue cranberry work shirt he had on, but nothing else underneath. The shirt was unbuttoned, showing him wearing several of his favorite necklaces, including his crucifix and St. Christopher's metal. Not a whole lot of his chest was showing, but enough, all the way down to his flat stomach, his belly button, and the cut-in of his pelvis and that tiny little bit of hair going down... Quinn's eyes almost popped out of her head. She had given the same reaction when she saw Joe earlier completely naked. He had a great body, not overly muscular, no abs, but smooth firm parts all around. His arms, his biceps, his flat stomach, smooth chest, and tattoos. This photo was modest, yet incredibly sexy. It really was a beautiful photo, and captured just how handsome he really was.

One thing she had instantly noticed about Joe was how clear his skin was. Usually teenagers their age were constantly battling acne or pimples. She remembered how awful her face looked in the months after having Beth, her hormones going to war on her face. From the moment she met him, she saw how his face truly was flawless, not one blemish. She later learned that he credited being vegan for the last eight years as the main reason why he really never had problems with his skin, that and lots of water. At lunch every day in the cafeteria he always drank two bottles of water, one after another. It constantly puzzled her on how he wasn't running to go pee every two seconds. She had closely studied his face before. His thick eyebrows, his hazel eyes that constantly seemed to change color, his full lips, and his nose ring. She had gotten her nose pierced herself during her 'breakdown' phase, and surprised Joe when she pointed out she even still had the hole. Her boyfriend was handsome, maybe not in the traditional sense, and she knew it puzzled people seeing such opposites attract, but to Quinn she felt as though she had lucked out. Not only did Joe have a good heart, an amazing listener, sweet, was fateful to his beliefs, had an amazing voice, was a great kisser...he was also very handsome. She had asked him once if he ever thought about cutting off his dreads. As always, Joe would shrug, and simply say maybe someday for a good cause or reason, until then it was part of who he was. When she had seen him naked, she knew she needed to be very patient in not making him feel guilty, or second guess what they were doing.

She respected, and figured she even loved him, and was going to try damn hard not to mess this up despite the long distance that was ticking away on them at the end of the summer. No, she was determined to make this work, and have fun with her boyfriend this summer. She wasn't sure if she could get him to fully go all the way, but she wanted to let him know nothing was sinful or wrong about them exploring each other's bodies, and feeling pleasure. With Joe everything was a new experience, like a newborn baby, or an alien from another planet. She loved seeing the wide eyed amazement on his face whenever something new happened. She couldn't believe how big his penis was, and wondered if she could somehow convince him to maybe...going a little further. The idea of putting his penis in her mouth excited her, and images of how shy he seemed covering himself when they both agreed to finally see themselves...all of themselves. Lifting her eyes, she smiled.

"Wow...this is so sexy, when did you take this?"

Joe shrugged, blushing some more.

"A few days ago. Mike helped me take it. His cousin wants to be a photographer. He had this little makeshift studio in his basement. Well...Mike wanted to take a similar photo for Tina, and Sam came with us...I guess he wanted to take one too and give to Mercedes as a graduation gift or something. We kept it pretty hush hush. It took the guys a lot of convincing to get me to do it. I didn't want to be inappropriate, but they said you would love it. I usually don't do this kind of thing. I'm not vain...I just thought...I know it's stupid..."

Instantly Quinn gently cupped the side of his face.

"Joe, I honestly don't know which I love more...the bracelet or the photo. You look so amazing...I love it!"

"You do?"

Quinn smiled, kissing him again. When they broke apart, Joe smirked.

"Just...for your eyes only okay? This was a gift for you...okay?"

"I promise."

Joe smiled, looking at her, before brushing back a few fallen strands of her own hair out of her face.

"You have the most beautiful body...you're the first...woman I've ever..."

Smiling, Quinn cut him off by pressing her lips firmly against his, running her hands slowly up and down the sides of his body. Once the kiss broke, both breathless, and breathing hard, Joe smirked and leaned against her.

"I better get out of here...I'll call you in the morning. I might have to say a few extra prayers tonight."

Quinn laughed, raising her eyebrows.

"Yeah, me too...but no regrets right?"

"Absolutely no regrets."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

She saw Joe off, kissing him once more at the front door, before promising to call him in the morning. It seemed so surreal that high school was officially over. It seemed just like yesterday she had finally lost the weight, got contracts, and entered school with a brand new fresh outlook that she absolutely couldn't wait to have. Everything, including Beth, her parent's divorce. Puck, Finn, Sam, her breakdown, Glee Club, The Cheerios, the competitions, the wins, the loses, the proms, her accident, the heartbreaks, the kisses, the sex, and laughter, the parties, the fun...and of course Joe. She had graduated today, she had proven everyone wrong. She was going to Yale, recovered from her accident, was part of Nationals, and had an amazing boyfriend. She had settled things with Puck, helping tutor him a few days ago. When Puck tried to kiss her, she simply pulled back and shook her head.

"I'm sorry...we have a history, and I know we haven't been close since Beth, but I love Joe."

Puck made a face.

"Teen Jesus? Really Quinn? I thought you just help bad for the Avatar dude since he helped you walk again. Another miracle thanks to the all mighty Jesus!"

Quinn had made a face.

"Don't say that, you know Joe and I are serious."

"Are you going to stay serious after you go to Yale and he's still stuck here, the last remaining member of the God Squad?"

"Puck..."

With that Puck shrugged and they continued studying, but she knew it bothered him that Joe and her were together. Still, she was relieved and happy Puck passed his test and graduated with them today. One thing she did notice though, was after the graduation show, when everyone met up with their families for photos. Quinn's mom insisted on a cute posed photo with Joe and her. Joe had picked up Quinn like a groom would to a bride. Scooping her up, still in her red cap and gown, Quinn squealed with delight as Joe held her up and kissed her cheek, making her crack up completely. At that exactly moment, Quinn's mother snapped the photo. Right before Joe set her down, Quinn glanced over and saw Puck glaring. But that was pushed away from her mind. She had so much fun with Joe tonight, going to his parents' BBQ, going to Rachel Berry's graduation party her two dads were holding, headed to Bread Sticks for Mercedes' party, and finally Finn and Kurt's at their house. After that, they returned here and decided to make good on their promise to each other if they won nationals. They agreed on seeing each other naked, and that was it. Quinn was grateful that Joe hadn't of stopped her, or felt bad after she gave him the hand job.

When she said goodbye, she watched him leave, driving his mother's Honda, slowly backing down the road. Smiling, she stood there, before shutting the door, and returning up the stairs and into her room. She thought of a shower, and decided she was too exhausted for that. Instead she decided to hold off until morning. She changed into Joe's shirt, and shorts, and smiled at her red graduation cap and tassel hanging off her vanity mirror. She was officially done with high school. She had graduated, and how she had a whole summer to spend with Joe and welcome him to more new experiences like tonight. Crawling into bed, she used the tiny remote to turn her A.C on, as she laid back, only the lamp on her nightstand on, which gave ooff a casted purple dim light. Staring at her charm bracelet, she smiled, cocking her head to the side, listening to the tiny charms clink together like wind chimes. She had honestly never felt so happy... That's when she took the photo of Joe off her nightstand. Smiling, she stared at it, before slowly her hand slid into her shorts. In just a few minutes she was seeing sparks, and felt the building up and tingling begin to happen down there. Tilting her head back, she gasped, all the while pretending Joe was in bed with her.

Now here she was, days later, driving to Coy's pond, wearing her best bathing suit, her copper bracelet on, and her boyfriend sitting right beside her. Since that night, they hadn't done anything else besides kissing, but she wanted him more than ever. They had been inseparable since graduation, and had been having so much fun. Turning up the radio the two sang along to a Katy Perry. It was a hot summer morning, and by the time they arrived and parked in the small lot behind the beach near the trees, Joe offered to ride Quinn piggyback since the incline to the beach had mud and puddles that had formed form the rainstorm the night before. Quinn tried to say she was fine, but Joe insisted, having her wear the backpack with their stuff as he leaned down, letting her jump on as he carried her down the small hill. They saw that Blaine and Kurt were just arriving the same time as them, and screaming bloody murder over the mud themselves. Finn silently tagged along, really not looking like he was enjoying the fact he had somehow gotten trapped into going out with them.

Quinn knew he was taking everything hard as of lately. Him not getting into school, and of course breaking off the engagement with Rachel. She felt for him, and of course would always have a special place in her heart for Finn, but she figured he just needed time. Once they got settled on a really nice part of the beach, within the hour everyone had arrived. Sugar had the guys set up the chairs and umbrellas. A folding table was set up for the food, and coolers were rolled out with water, soda, wine coolers, and beer that Puck had brought, but warned everyone if they saw any cops to dump everything in the water. Besides a young couple laying out tanning further down the beach, it was just them. They played their music just loud enough for them to hear so they wouldn't disturb the couple, who honestly didn't seem to mind. Quinn tried a wine cooler, and offered one to Joe to politely said no thanks and drank water instead. Quinn sat in a beach chair, while Joe sat in the warm sand in front of her, between her legs, laying back.

Absently, she stroked his dreads as everyone sat in a circle talking, and laughing...well everyone besides Finn. After everyone ate lunch, the guys decided to play a game of volleyball with a rolled out set they set up. The girls sat in the shade of the umbrellas, and talked while sipping their drinks, all laughing about Rachel Berry's party years ago and how drunk they all got. Kurt, who had stayed with the girls, layering on more sunblock rolled his eyes.

"How can I forget when Rachel and Blaine they got so drunk they ended up making out." Sugar was gagged over this, demanding details as Kurt smirked at Quinn who watched Joe, playing volleyball on the same side as Blaine.

"How are things going with Joe?"

Quinn smirked before showing her bracelet.

"Good, he got me this the night of graduation. He's been so sweet."

Kurt gushed over the bracelet, before sighing. Quinn knew they had never truly been close, but over this past year, she had a new formed respect for him.

"Have you and Blaine had the talk yet? You know...him still being in school and you..."

"Well since my New York plans fell apart, until I can reapply again next spring I'm going to the local community college. It's not exactly my dream come true, but it's something. The only up side is that we'll be together...but before any of this happened yes we did have the talk. I think Blaine was more scared than me, but I reassured him that we would travel back and forth and Skype, and talk to each other every night...I told him if you love somebody enough all of that extra work is worth it in the end. How about you?"

Quinn sadly smiled staring across at Joe, laughing and giving a high five to Sam, his sleeves rolled up, dreads pulled back. She loved seeing him laugh, it was as if his entire face lit up when it happened.

"We have, we're going to try our hardest. I mean he has two more years here. He's the first guy I've ever dated that...well...it just comes naturally. He makes me feel better, and better about myself. He's...different."

"You seem really happy with him, I can see the way you look at him."

Quinn smiled still watching him.

"Yeah...like you said, all of the extra work...it's worth it."

Less than an hour later everyone had gone for a swim, everyone besides Finn who sat in the shade sipping a beer, not saying much. The harder people tried to cheer him up, the less he would say. So, everyone decided to leave him alone. Everyone went into the water, mostly the shallow end. The girls didn't really go any further than past their waists, none of them would dunk under, and squealed by the cold water, even though it seemed to warm up the longer they stayed in with the beating hot sun shinning down on them. The guys all horsed around, going deeper, diving under, and laughing as they splashed. Arnie floated on a pool float with Sugar who wore a giant sunhat. At one point the guys and girls all played chicken. Kurt with Blaine on his shoulders, vs Mike with Tina on his shoulders. Then came Santana with Brittany on her shoulders vs Joe, with Quinn on his shoulders.

When Joe had taken off his shirt, Santana catcalled him, and remarked that Teen Jesus not only had a smoking body, but the tats to decorate it. Joe blushed, but Quinn simply rolled her eyes, pulling him into the direction towards the water. Once everyone was swimming, everyone seemed to be having a great time. Everyone got into a splashing fight, and Joe and Quinn swam beside each other, laughing, and letting the sun beat down on them, before Sugar called the girls back to the beach to work on their tans. Sam continued pulling Arnie around, as the guys kept horsing around. Quinn walked up with Brittany and Mercedes, before grabbing their towels and sitting in the shade around Finn. Mercedes sat close to Finn, resting her head on his shoulder, actually making him crack a smile as he sat back still nursing his beer.

That's when Quinn, who was gently patting her face dry with her towel, heard Blaine yell from the water.

"PUCK! STOP!"

Quinn turned, and saw Puck in the water further down, doing something that she couldn't quite see from that distance. Squinting, she shielded her hand to try and see what was happening. She heard Kurt yell, and then saw Sam leave Arnie and start swimming quickly in that direction. Puzzled, Quinn stood there before Santana stood beside her. "What the Hell?" The girls looked, before Finn shot up and started running towards the water. The girls all stood back confused before Finn drove into the water, splashing. Kurt was still yelling, when Puck resurfaced and starting yelling that he was just joking. That's when Quinn saw, the guys all going under the water looking... That's when she heard Finn and Sam yell something.

"GET HIM TO SHORE!"

Quinn stood frozen, eyes widening before she saw what was happening. Finn and Sam were swimming, holding onto Joe. He looked slumped over, his wet dreads hanging in his face as they dragged him closer and closer to the shallow end. Mike was helping Arnie as Sugar screamed, adding for dramatic effect. Dragging him into the shallow end, Finn hooked his arms under Joe's arms, before dragging him up onto the sand that stuck to his wet skin and hair. Quinn felt her heart drop before she took off running, kicking up clouds of sand before racing towards him. Falling hard to her knees, she saw Joe's eyes were closed. Looking up at the crowd of everyone surrounding him, all dripping wet, she suddenly felt confused as well as furious.

"WHAT HAPPENED?!"

Kurt who was dripping wet shot Puck who slowly walked over, dripping wet.

"Puck was horsing around and pushed down on Joe's shoulders, holding him under. He was struggling but he wouldn't let go of him even after we all FUCKING YELLED AT HIM YOU PSYCHO!"

Quinn turned, her lips curled back, her eyes wild.

"WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?!"

Puck stood back, speechless before he saw everyone looking at him.

"I was just fooling...I didn't know he couldn't breathe I..."

Quinn turned, and lightly slapped Joe's cheeks, his eyes still closed. Terrerfied, she laid her ear down on his wet sand sprinkled chest. She listened, but heard nothing.

"He's not breathing!"

Sugar screamed again, saying something about going to dial 911. Blaine sprang into action, telling everyone to give him space. Tilting Joe's head up, moving his wet dreads out of his face, Blaine laced his hands together, placing them over his chest and began to pump up and down, his ungelled hair dripping wet, and hanging in his face, as he counted. Quinn knelt there, tears filling her eyes before Blaine motioned to Quinn.

"Pinch his nose shut, and give him three deep breaths, one after another when I say so."

He continued pumping before finally he nodded to Quinn. Hands shaking, she tilted his head up, pinching his nose shut, and pressing her lips against his and breathing in. One...two...three... She couldn't lose him, no...she was everything to her. No, this couldn't be happening... She breathed into his mouth again, before she looked at Blaine, terrified. Blaine nodded, and began to pump up and down, counting in steady paces.

Then... Joe's eyes snapped open as he vomited up a huge mouthful of water, spraying it upwards, as he choked, and started gasping for air. Everyone almost at the same exact time breathed a deep sigh of relief. Joe continued coughing, gasping for air, as Quinn let out a cry, helping him turn over with Blaine's help.

"Oh my God...Joe...thank God...breathe baby, just breathe..."

Joe choked again, before finally he laid back, eyes closed as he continued breathing in deeply. Holding onto him, Quinn stared at Blaine, tears filling her face before she leaned over and tightly hugged him.

"Thank you..."

Everyone stood back in stunned silence as Quinn continued hugging Blaine for dear life after he saved her boyfriend's life.

**Later...**

The near drowning had really put a cloud over the beach day and everyone packed up shortly after. Everyone refusing to talk to Puck who kept trying to apologize. Joe sat in the passenger seat of Quinn's car, a towel draped over his shoulders. He had been asked over and over if he was okay and humble as ever, Joe said he was fine. Before Blaine and Kurt left, they stopped by the car to check in on Joe. Standing, Joe caught Blaine off guard by tightly hugging him.

"I plan on thanking God tonight for what you did. Thank you Blaine..."

Blaine smirked before nodding.

"Happy to help."

Kurt squeezed Blaine's arm, ready to read him away when Quinn walked over, her eyes still red and puffy from crying. Walking over, she hugged Blaine even tighter than earlier, burying her face against his shoulder.

"Thank you..."

Blaine smirked, patting her arm.

"My pleasure Quinn."

Just then Puck walked over, head bowed looking ashamed as he sighed and rubbed his neck.

"Hey...listen, I'm sorry man...I was horsing around and things got out of control. Guess I gotta know when to stop..."

Before he could finish, Quinn had let go of Blaine and turned on him. Face crumpling, she brought her hand back, and slapped Puck right across the face, the sound hollow and loud, knocking his face back slightly as everyone gasped. Puck stood back, eyes stunned before Quinn glared at him.

"Stay the Hell away from us psycho. You make me ashamed to know we have a daughter together."

"Quinn..."

Joe tried to start, but Finn walked up behind Kurt and Blaine. Everyone looked at each other, before Puck sighed, head still down before he started walking in the direction towards his bike. An awkward silence settled upon everyone, before Blaine and Kurt walked over and hugged Quinn, kissing her cheeks.

"Sorry honey about that, ignore him, he's an ass. We'll call you tomorrow and get together okay?"

Quinn thanked them, hugging back before they left. Finn sighed, before clapping Joe on the arm and nodded.

"Glad you're doing okay man, take it easy."

Joe thanked him, before he followed the others. Sighing loudly, he touched his damp dreads and sighed.

"Well that was scary, I've never had anyone hold me underwater before and I used to swim at the local YMCA pool all the time with some really mean kids..."

Before he could say another word, Quinn turned and tightly wrapped her arms around him, squeezing him as tight as she could.

"You...could...have...died...you..."

With that she completely lost it, breaking down as she started to sob against Joe who put his arms around her, bringing her in as he kissed her hair.

"Shhhh...it's okay...I'm not going anywhere, I promise..."

**Present**

That awful memory came back to her from the day at the beach all those years ago. Puck ended up apologizing again, admitting he had taken the prank too far, and even though Quinn and Joe forgave him, Quinn never fully trusted him again. She remembered how frightened she was when Joe wasn't breathing, and Blaine having to give him CPR. It was the worst, most helpless feeling in the world. Just like how she felt today at the hospital when she learned about Joe and the DNR. Squeezing his hand, she prayed to God for more time. She needed more time with her husband, she needed him more than she ever believed. That's when his hand squeezed hers back, and Quinn whipped up her head, eyes bloodshot and filled with exhausted tears. Joe laid there, oxygen mask fogging up, as he weakly stared at her.

"Hey..." He said, muffled from beneath the mask.

Face crumpling, Quinn kissed his hand, not having the strength to confront him about the DNR. No, at this exact moment she just wanted to look into her husband's eyes knowing death hadn't collected yet, he was still with her, and she knew that when it really did happen...it would drive her absolutely crazy.


	8. Something new

**Before...**

This had be set summer of Quinn's life. For the past several weeks Joe and her had become inseparable, they had spent countless days and nights together, falling more and more in love. Finally the day came when it was time to say goodbye. He saw her off, her car packed right outside of her house one breezy day in August. Her mother had hugged her tightly, making her promise to call her the second she arrived on campus. She would be coming down a day or so behind, staying at a hotel in town, and be with her for orientation. The night before Quinn barley slept, laying in her bed, staring up at the ceiling, so scared she thought she might be sick. Lima had been her home for what seemed like forever, and these past few months had been the happiest in her life. Ever since that day at the beach, Quinn had been so close with Joe, friends like Tina and Kurt joked that Quinn might as well change her name to "Hart." Puck had apologized countless times, and even though Joe had said moved on, and said it was simply just a prank that had gotten out of control, Quinn still felt uneasy about the whole thing. Joe reminded her that forgiveness was a huge part of their faith, but Quinn kept thinking back on that terrifying morning where she stood back as Blaine performed CPR and Joe laid pale and still. This past summer went by like a blur. Quinn had taken Joe to Cedar Point, and never thought she had laughed so hard in her entire life watching his reaction when they rode the biggest rollercoaster there.

Joe had taken her to a few Christian rock concerts, and Quinn brought him to a concert of Jimmy Eat World and Yellowcard. Afterwards Joe kept raving about how much fun the show was, and had Quinn download a few of their albums onto his phone. They swam in Quinn's pool, splashing, and laughing, even though the beach had left Quinn shaken. Most days they would lay out in the sun, side by side tanning. They went to the movies, each time a new experience for Joe since he had barley seen any. Each time Quinn would smile, watching him gaze up at the screen with wide eyes, his jaw dropped, and such an innocent look of wonder spread across his face. They went out on double dates with either Kurt and Blaine, or Tina and Mike. They met up with the New Directions at least once a week, either all together as a group at one of their house's or Breadsticks. Puck as always kept his distance. On the 4th of July Brittany held a party at her house. Finn was gone by then, and that night Puck had all ready taken off for California.

The party wasn't crazy, but it was sorta being doubled as a going away party for Mercedes who was set to take off for the West Coast within the next two weeks. It truly felt like things were changing. That night everyone sang karaoke, sipped drinks, and danced in Brittany's backyard. Down the hill at the park the fireworks show was being held, which gave everyone a perfect view. Joe laid back on one of the patio lounge chairs, with Quinn laying back between his two legs, laying back against his chest. Holding hands, they gazed upward at gorgeous explosions of gold, silver, blue, and red lit up the sky as blossoms. The gorgeous explosions sparkled and reflected in her eyes as Quinn smiled, before holding Joe's hand and gave it a kiss. Feeling him kiss the top of her head, she wished this moment would last forever. That night as everyone grilled out and lit up sparklers, Quinn laughed the hardest she laughed. She danced with Joe and her fiends as music blasted, and by the end of the night they all toasted to Finn, wishing he was here. Rachel had returned having missed him, and was currently back in New York on vacation with her dads. She seemed miserable since Finn ended things to let her go to start her new future in New York, but nevertheless put on a brave face. When she was due to return she had promised a shopping trip with Quinn, Santana and Brittany. She had never really liked Rachel, but ever since prom she had found a soft spot in her heart for her and truly did want them to remain somewhat of friends in the years to come. When it came down to it Rachel was talented, and deserved everything with all of the hard work she put in.

She hated that things had ended up this way with Finn, and only hoped someway, somehow they could have a happy ending. Still, she hoped this had been somewhat of a lesson for Rachel believing they could get married and make it work at this stage in their lives. That night Quinn drove her car up to Miller's point. Just outside one of the many parks, surprised that nobody was around, figuring everyone was watching the firework shows, and listening to the school band summer performance in the parks in the center of town. Driving up, parking beneath a beautiful weeping willow tree, she kept the engine running allowing the A.C to keep going, as well as have the radio softly play. This park was known for having several different trees from all over the country planted here. William McKinley had traveled from coast to coast before he founded this town, returning with several trees he planted himself. The weeping massive willow was one of them. This park was beautiful with a mash in the center, and several walking trails that led through the thick forest that surrounded it.

Tonight it was completely abandoned. Fainting hearing cicadas in the distance, Quinn sat there, staring at the blueish green tint the park had at this time of night. It was a hot still night, and she saw tiny glowing fire flies float through the air. Her car sitting in the small parking area, she suddenly felt very excited. She glanced over at Joe who sat beside her, his eyes gazing out the windshield, his skin a beautiful golden tan, causing his features to look very exotic and , she stared at him. They had been having such a fun time these last few weeks. They spent hours at night either texting or talking on the phone. Several times he had stayed over to watch a movie at her house, cuddling with her, and always leaving afterwards, being respectful as his body laid against hers. Sometimes she could feel him pressing against her. Whenever that happened, he would always either move his body back, or quickly excusing himself to the bathroom. Each time when she thought they might start up something, he would kiss her goodnight and go home. It was frustrating, mostly whenever they would start making out and Quinn would try and lift his shirt, and touch him between the legs. He would pull away, flushed, and gasping for breath before shaking his head.

Tonight Quinn knew she was pressing her luck again, but she felt incredibly turned on. Sitting there, she knew he was glancing in her direction. She had a short skirt on over her bathing suit. She very slowly inched it up, showing her thighs. Glancing over, she smirked staring at him. Instantly Joe gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. He right away stared forward, looking nervous. Cocking her head to the side, she smiled.

"I want to...try something...if you trust me?"

Joe gulped before he nodded.

"Sure...just tell me what to do."

Within the next few minutes both had climbed into the backseat, pushing the front seats up as far as they could, giving them plenty of room.

"Quinn...I can't..."

Quinn gently pressed her finger against Joe's lips.

"Shhhh, don't worry we're not having sex. I just wanna show you a way to feel good. Sit back."

Joe's eyes widened before Quinn stared at him. "Trust me?" Joe nodded, looking more nervous than ever. Quinn carefully climbed on top of his lap, straddling him before staring down. Gulping, he stared up at her, before Quinn began to move. Rolling her hips, she yanked her skirt up, allowing only the thin material of her bathing suit and his swim shorts between them. She could feel him growing hard, as she started rubbing her crotch against his.

"Quinn..."

He said in an unsteady voice.

"Shhh..."

She said, smiling, bowing her head, her blond hair hanging down and she kissed him deeply. Tilting his head back, Joe firmly gripped onto hips, holding her into place as she continued grinding herself down against him, enjoying the sensation that she was the reason he was getting so hard. Joe locked eyes with her as she continued moving, before suddenly he snapped his eyes shut, and uttered a cry. Feeling warmth, she knew he came right in his pants. Putting his head back, Joe gasped for air, before Quinn kissed him, allowing both to catch their breaths. Smiling, she continued kissing him, to his jawline, his throat, and down to his collarbone. Playfully she nipped at his skin, making him laugh. Laughing, Quinn pressed her forehead against his.

"That feel good?"

Joe closed his eyes, gulping loudly before nodding, his skin feeling clammy. Smiling, Quinn kissed his throat, from his Adam's apple, all the way down to his chest. When her hand went to snake down between his legs, Joe took her hand, and brought it up smiling. Knowing she wouldn't get any further, she simply smiled before kissing him firmly on the lips. Several times she had tried to give him either a hand job or a blowjob, and each time he politely refused telling her he was fine. She knew the real reason was because he felt guilty whenever they fooled around like this, and since the night of graduation they hadn't seen each other naked, besides Quinn seeing him in swim shorts. They had some pretty intense make out sessions with some heavy petting, but Joe's hands would always remain away from her breasts, even pulling away whenever she tried to push things further.

All she wanted was to make him feel good, but so far this summer besides one cuddles, making out, and holding hands, they didn't go any further. Quinn was frustrated, but respected Joe's wishes. Pressing his forehead against hers, he gave a tried little laugh before sighing.

"Let's get you home..."

That night Joe sat in Quinn's car as the car sat parked in front of his house. It was late, and the radio continued to play softly. Smiling, Joe reached over and gently lifted her chin with his hand. Turning, she smiled at him. He smiled back.

"You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine...hope...you're not mad about tonight?"

Joe raised an eyebrow before he smirked.

"Hey...that part was a lot of fun but...I know there's only so much resisting I can do, especially when it comes to you."

Quinn smiled before she leaned over, kissing Joe goodnight, and watching him climb out of the car and walk to his front door. Sitting there behind the wheel, she never wanted anything more than to go further with Joe. Frustrated, she simply sighed, before starting her engine and driving away. The next week when she went shopping with the girls Rachel asked how things were going with Joe? Sadly smiling, Quinn remarked it was going great, so great in fact she was absolutely terrified she was either going to scare him away, or mess things up when she left for Yale. Now here she was weeks later saying goodbye to Joe in front of her house. Staring at him, she suddenly felt as if there hadn't been enough time in the world. She was ending the best summer of her life, and off to school where she was leaving everything she had known behind. Swallowing, she stared up at him.

"You better use your train pass damnit and call me every night." Joe smirked before taking her hand and gently kissing her knuckles.

"I promise. Text me when you get there, and remember...this is the first chapter in your new adventure. Remember, this is supposed to be exciting, not sad."

"Just...promise me you won't run off with some cute girl from church or something and break my heart."

Laughing, Joe shook his head before gathering her in his arms. Holding her tight, he hugged her tight, before kissing the top of her head.

"I promise Quinn. I love you."

Struggling with tears, Quinn raised her head and locked eyes with him.

"I love you too."

With that they kissed one last time, sweetly and firmly before they broke apart. Staring at each other they knew there was nothing else to say. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes for just a second and pressed her forehead against his. They stayed silent for just a moment before breaking apart. Taking a deep breath, Quinn knew if she didn't get into her car she never would. Sighing, she took her keys out of her pocket, before climbing into her car. Putting her safety belt on, she started the engine, before looking out at Joe. He smiled, raised his hand and waved. Fighting back tears, Quinn raised her hand back weakly in return, before putting the car in drive and pulled down the street. Just once she looked in the rearview mirror, and saw Joe standing there, hands in his pockets watching her. Here Quinn completely lost it. Feeling a heavy rattling in her chest, she began to softly weep before she stared forward, gripping the steering-wheel and driving forward into an unknown future.

**Present**

Dr. Swayer looked over Joe afterwards, before changing his oxygen to two tiny tubes going up his nose instead of the mask. He shinned a penlight into both of his eyes, checked his reflexes, and finally agreed he still wasn't completely out of the clear, and would needed to be closely monitored. After his blood pressure was taken, Dr. Swayer gently patted Joe's arm and told him he would be closely monitored for the next forty-eight hours. Joe thanked him, his greenish hazel eyes watching Quinn who sat back silently, arms crossed, hands cupping her elbows. Her own eyes were puffy from crying herself. Once everything was done, Dr. Swayer told Joe he would be back later to check on him, before leaving without saying so much as another word. Left alone once the click of the room door came, Quinn continued glaring at her husband, the only sound came from the machines that were hooked up to Joe, beeping, and clicking. Finally Quinn spoke first.

"You just can't wait to leave me can't you?"

Joe suddenly looked very puzzled. Sitting back he blinked before Quinn looked off to the side, tears of frustration starting to fill her eyes as she chewed on her lip. After another solid moment of neither of them speaking, Joe finally sighed, looking downright exhausted.

"You made them work on me didn't you?" Quinn at first refused to speak, before finally silent furious tears ran down her face before she sniffled, and looked away for a second.

"A DNR Joe? A fucking DNR? When was I supposed to find out as you flatline right beside me?!"

Joe swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, and suddenly Quinn remembered all those years ago, during the happiest summer of her life with him. Straddling him lap on the 4th of July, grinding against him, basically dry humping him in the backseat of the car. Remembering how unsure his eyes seemed as she climbed on top of him, seeing how nervous he was. Right now all these years later, here he was, slowly dying, and having to explain to his wife why yet again he was giving up.

"I can't take the suffering anymore..."

He began, when Quinn whipped her head towards him, eyes narrowing as she glared at him.

"Suffering?! I could take you finally giving up on treatments, or trying anything else after what's happened. But you have no idea what this is doing to me watching my soulmate just decide that enough is enough and you're throwing in the towel. You're in your early 20's Joe! Do you really want to leave me alone that badly? Do you really want to join our son up in a Heaven we're both not even sure even exists?!"

By the time she was finished her face was flushed and her eyes wide. She felt she had snapped, and as much as she hated to argue with him, this was a long time coming. Instead, Joe stayed calm as always. He sat there calmly, swallowed, and stared at her.

"You're upset...but it doesn't mean you need to question your faith. Trust me, I've been tested. Especially after losing Nash. But I didn't mean me. I meant you. I've had enough watching you suffer. You're right Quinn, we're in our early 20's. No need to allow yourself to get dragged down because of me. I'm dying Quinn, there is no happy ending here. I don't want you keeping me alive so you can live out your days in this depressing hospital room. Enough is enough."

Quinn then couldn't take it anymore. Instead her lip quivered, before her entire face crumpled. Lowering her head into her hands, her shoulders sagged before she sobbed louder than she ever cried before. When she finally felt like she had cried herself out, she saw Joe still sitting there, calmly watching her. Sniffling, she shook her head.

"You change that DNR damnit, I swear on our son's soul I'll kill myself if you try that shit again."

"Quinn..."

Shaking her head, Quinn got up before sitting beside him.

"No, change it tonight...promise me."

"This isn't going to make the end result different. One time they won't be able to bring me back...I need to know you aren't going to stop living all because of me. I need to know you'll live...for me."

Feeling a shaken breath, Quinn dropped her eyes for a second before nodding. She looked at him, before she broke down again, crying this time softly before gently wrapping her arms around his frail body, and burying her face against his shoulder. Softly, he stroked her back as the machines around them continued to click and beep.

**Before** Quinn was now going to physical therapy three times a week with now the help from Joe. This made things ten times easier since her mother's schedule was usually jammed packed.. The two had become close over the last few weeks, mostly starting when he actually reached out to her right after it happened. Today the doctor had instructed Joe on exactly what to do, so as Quinn laid in her yoga pants, she laid back as Joe climbed up on the table, carefully bending her legs.

"Is that too much?"

He said, lifting her right leg up as he scooted closer, holding her by the ankle as he continued bending. Just then Quinn felt something hard pressing against her thigh. Unable to contain her smile, she looked to the side.

"Is that umm?"

Joe looked down, almost stunned that this was actually happened even though it was the most natural thing to happen in the world.

"I'm so sorry..."

Joe got off her quickly and sat on the edge of the table, looking down almost ashamed by one of the most natural things to ever happen. Quinn smiled trying to not make this too embarrassing for him. She knew this was all new to him. He made a face as if he was kicking himself and her heart broke for him.

"It's okay, it happens..."

"It's just...you are the prettiest...nicest...best smelling girl I've ever met."

"Weren't you home schooled? How many girls have you even met?"

Joe turned towards her, his eyes serious.

"Don't do that. Don't find ways to run yourself down."

Quinn sighed staring up rolling her eyes at herself.

"I guess I have been doing that a lot lately...It's just hard not to focus on what I lost."

"What if I helped you? Like the way I use my hands to move your legs, maybe you could use my eyes to see yourself the way I see you."

"And what would I see?"

"Perfection."

This honestly seemed like the first time Quinn actually blushed and giggled as if she was just like any other normal eighteen year old. Both laughed, seeing how openly they were flirting.

"So what are you looking for here? Do you want me to be your girlfriend?"

Joe seemed stunned.

"I...don't know. I mean yes totally, but my faith means everything to me It's just when I'm with you...I don't care what God says about sins of the flesh. I just want to feel what it would be like...right up next to you."

He gently stroked her leg, nothing dirty about it, actually it was in gentle strokes even though Quinn could barley feel it.

"You would give up your faith to be with me?"

"I don't know...are you asking me?"

"No...never."

Joe nodded, hurt showing in his eyes.

"Because you don't like me that way..."

"Because it's nice knowing there's something that can't be lost."

They stared at each other and Quinn smiled again, unable to believe the butterflies she was feeling deep in her stomach.

"Help me up..."

Joe firmly grabbed her hand, and carefully eased her into a sitting position where both were less than an inch away from each other. That's when Quinn knew she was falling head over heels for him and nothing was going to stop her, even his strong beliefs.

"So what is this? You and me?"

Quinn sat transfixed staring into his hazel eyes.

"I don't know...something new."

Joe smiled back at her, and suddenly everything felt alright.

**Later...**

Joe and Quinn decided to actually head back to school after physical therapy and head to Glee club. Joe ended up playfully pushing Quinn's chair onto the stage as he parked it and danced with the others making Quinn laugh. The rest of the lesson Mr. Schuester allowed them to perform the last of the Whitney tributes, before everything started partying their separate ways. Arnie's mom was giving Quinn a lift home since her van could hold two chairs. Staring up at Joe, Quinn smirked feeling color raise in her face as he grabbed his bag.

"Text me tonight."

Joe looked stunned but smiled and nodded quickly.

"Um yeah totally."

Quinn giggled before she wheeled away. Watching her, Joe smiled before Sam watched over and clapped him on the arm.

"So? How are things going?"

Joe smirked before he lowered his voice low enough just for Sam to hear.

"Do you think Quinn would go to prom with me?"

Sam's entire face lit up.

"That sounds awesome dude. Of course she'll go!"

Joe stood back proudly watching Quinn wheel away, silently promising himself that this girl even though she was one of the first he had really met since he started school was special.

**Present**

Quinn got back into bed with Joe, curled up beside him, gently stroking his waved thinning hair. It just seemed like yesterday his thick heavy dreads covered his head. Both had silently made up, knowing better to not say another word. Joe had Quinn get Dr. Swayer, and agreed to unsigned the DNR. Now it was just the two of them, laying side by side listening to his monitors beep and click.

"Depending on how you're doing in the next couple of days a few of the old gang might come back into town. Rachel, Jesse, Kurt, Blaine, maybe some others. Do you think you would be up to seeing them?"

Joe smirked, staring across from her, looking so weak and pale.

"That sounds nice, just like old times."

Quinn reached over and squeezed her hands's hands before pressing her forehead against his, praying with all her might that God wouldn't take her husband away from her yet...not yet.


	9. Apart

_**"So do not fear, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed. I will strengthen you I will uphold you with my righteous hand."**_

**Before... **

It was just a few mere hours before lights out in Chicago for nationals. Hours before Quinn worked up the nerve to meet Joe in the closet and show him something he certainly had never seen before. Hours before everyone slept with both a mixture of fear, and pure excitement. Hours before it turned into a mere afternoon before they became champions. The gang all were still in the rehearsal room Mr. Schuester had rented out which was used for events, all finally deciding enough practice was enough and decided to just sit around in a giant circle and hang out before Mr. Schuester officially called it lights out. As everyone began to sit down, getting comfortable, Joe walked over to Quinn who looked slightly pale and uncomfortable.

"You okay?"

He asked, with concern in his eyes. Smirking, Quinn nodded and rubbed the side of her legs.

"Yeah, just feeling muscles I haven't felt in awhile."

Joe instantly reached out almost as if to steady her, still looking absolutely worried as he stared at her.

"Want to stretch it out, we can..."

Quinn smiled before leaning forward and gently kissing Joe's lips.

"I'm fine, come on..."

Taking his hand, she smiled as they settled down with the others. By the time that hour was up, and they had all agreed Mr. Schuester should in fact win the Best Teacher award this year, Quinn was stretched out, lounging against Joe, laying between his legs, her back against his chest, and absently stroking his hands which were safely, and respectfuly around her waist. They it was finally lights out they kissed, and as always pressed their heads against each other, closing their eyes as if life depended on it. Watching from afar, Santana made a face before rolling her eyes at Mercedes.

"Ugh, God Squad love yuck."

Mercedes looked across the room at Joe and Quinn before smiling and shrugging.

"I don't know...I think Joe is good for Quinn. She seems really happy."

Staring, Santana had to actually admit they really did make a good pair, and this was the happiest she had seen her friend in what honestly seemed like forever.

**Present**

Joe laid awake, holding Quinn in his narrow hospital bed honestly feeling defeated. After flatlining earlier, Joe didn't want to say it aloud, but he was absolutely terrified. One second he was drifting off to sleep, faintly listening to Quinn's voice, then completely out of nowhere he found himself with a tube down his throat, bright lights over him, and now the sound of Quinn's cries filled the room. He laid back confused, his chest hurting, and looking around, vision blurred, noticing there were several new nurses in the room. He was confused, as well as scared. He laid back, barley hearing what anyone was saying before he drifted off to sleep again.

When he woke, he knew the real reason why he was terrified was because there hadn't been any bright light, or warm embrace. Nothing that he was told would happen as a believer in God. He wasn't questioning if there was a Heaven, or even anything else. Still, the reality of what happened really hit him hard. His heart had stopped, which he had been told would eventually happen. He knew signing the DNR was cruel with how Quinn found out, and he had promised to change it over instantly after speaking with her. Now hours later once everything calmed down, he laid there holding his wife, listening to the machines click and beep softly, as fresh oxygen continued to get pumped up his nose. The drugs they were giving him made him feel light headed, and buzzed. He laid there, listening to his wife's breathing, and silently prayed that when the time did come to call him home, Quinn would be okay. He wasn't frightened of death, in fact, his beliefs were so strong he honestly felt in his heart when he did pass on, this would truly be the end of his suffering. He would be with their son again, and he would be in paradise. Still, he worried about Quinn. It was bad enough after they lost Nash, and then he got sick. What would happen to her once he was gone? Closing his eyes, he prayed God would give him a sign, and hopefully someway...somehow she would continue living once he was gone. Leaning over, he softly kissed her forehead as she continued to sleep, fighting back tears.

**Before...**

Marley had collapsed and her mother along with Jake were taking her to the hospital to get looked at. They had performed Gangnam Style, and everything had been going perfectly before right as the song finished, Marley dropped down like a head heap. They had lost sectionals, which meant it was officially over. No Nationals, no more competitions, all because of one simple mistake, it was all over. It honestly didn't seem real. Quinn also knew as much as she dreaded it, she would need to come clean with Joe. It was November, and Joe had visited a total of three times since she left in August. Yale had been a complete dream come true, and as crazy as her classes were, she was just beginning to fit in, and find her way there.

She had just begin a secret sorority, and was befriending plenty of girls from wealthy nice families. Nobody here knew about her past mistakes, and she was just beginning to discover who she truly was here. Originally she missed Joe like crazy. she Facetimed him nearly every night near tears. She missed home, as well as her friends, high school, her mom, and most of all Joe. When school began for him, he seemed excited, telling her all about the new members of The New Directions, and truly seemed happy. When he visited her one weekend, she couldn't stop smiling. He had taken the train in and only stayed the day, but she dragged him around, ignoring all the looks they were getting because of his hairstyle and tattoos. The other time he stayed over, sleeping on her dorm room floor while her roommate Nancy was crashing with her boyfriend.

The last time, which was just a few weeks ago, he stayed over the Halloween weekend, and Quinn didn't know what quite came over her. The second she opened her dorm room door and saw him standing there smiling, she became overwhelmed and grabbed him, catching him completely off guard with frenzied kisses. Twice that weekend she tried while they were making out to undo his pants, and each time Joe simply moved her hands and shook his his head pulling away.

"No Quinn..."

Frustrated, and more than a little annoyed, Quinn made a face before rolling her eyes.

"Jesus Christ Joe!"

Joe seemed hurt, but Quinn wouldn't talk about it. Now a few weeks later she came back home for Thanksgiving, and to help Finn coach some of the new members of The New Directions for sectionals. She had texted Joe a little here and there, but ever since that last visit things had been weird. Then last weekend after a mixer, she knew she had crossed the line. Not really wanting to face him, she had avoided him at all costs. When he finally came up to her, she nervously gulped, tucked her hair behind her ear, and told him they would catch up after the show. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, and hurried away, ignoring the confused hurt look in his eyes. Now she walked out into the parking-lot after all of the excitement had died down. Everyone was mostly still inside, trying to recover from the shock of what actually happened. She felt the crisp cool air hitting her face as she buttoned her jacket and saw Joe sitting on the curb, his dreads tied back. Taking a deep breath, she knew it was now or never. Walking over, heels clicking against the pavement, she gave a sad smile.

"Hey you..."

Joe looked up.

"Hey..."

"Can I sit down?"

Joe nodded before shrugging off his jacket and laying it down on the sidewalk. Just this one simple motion killed her, as she sighed, nervously bitting down on her bottom lip as she carefully sat down.

"Marley okay?"

Joe nodded.

"Jake drove her and her mom to the hospital."

"You okay?"

Joe shrugged.

"Just kinda weird to think it's all over. I mean I'm sure I'll have another chance next year if there even is a Glee club, I just feel bad for the seniors...this was their last chance."

Quinn sighed staring at him before she stared ahead.

"Joe...listen...we need to talk."

Joe sadly smiled before shaking his head.

"Quinn."

Quinn looked over and saw him sadly smiling at her.

"It's okay...it's okay."

Quinn struggled with tears as she stared down.

"I didn't cheat on you...it's just last week I met a guy at a party and..."

Joe reached over and gently covered her hand.

"You're in college now, I get it. I knew it was only a matter of time. You're a beautiful young woman Quinn, waiting around because of my beliefs is insane."

"No it's not..."

"Listen, it's okay. Don't feel guilty. Go back to school and have fun, no regrets okay?"

A single tear ran down Quinn's face as she sniffled.

"I...love you so much.."

Joe sadly smiled before he leaned over and gently kissed her cheek before closing his eyes and pressing his forehead against hers. They sat that way in silence for awhile before Joe nodded.

"Take care Quinn..."

With that, he got up. Quinn sat there for a second, before she got up herself and picked up his jacket, handing it back to him. Nodding, Joe muttered a thanks, before turning and walking away. Watching him go, head bowed she felt absolutely destroyed. She wanted nothing more than to call after him and tell him she was making a mistake. Instead she simply stood there feeling ruined as he disappeared into the darkness of the parking-lot.

**Before...**

Quinn sat up in the hospital bed, legs spread open by a nurse and by Joe. She had been in labor for hours now, and the doctor was currently working between her legs. Sitting up, her sweaty hair plastered down, she broke down crying by both the misery of what was happening, and by the pain. What should have been a joyful day, had turned into a nightmare...

"I can't..."

She cried, before the nurse and doctor coaxed her to push one more time. Whimpering in pure exhaustion, Quinn looked over at her husband, and saw the pure heartbreak in his eyes. Suddenly she remembered all those years ago on Thanksgiving when she was such an idiot and broke up with him. Back then she thought the expression in his eyes was pure heartbreak. Looking at his hazel eyes now, she knew she couldn't have been more wrong. How could this have happened? She thought back on the night she was certain Joe had gotten her pregnant, collapsing against her, out of breath, and flushed, having absolutely no idea months later the result of that love making would end in this. She stared up, tears in her eyes.

"I can't..."

She whispered. Joe looking much too pale, held her leg back and brought up one of her hands and squeezed it, kissing it.

"You can baby, come on...one more push, just look at me, it's just us...only you and me. Just one more push."

Quinn seemed so defeated, before she focused in on her husband's heartbroken eyes, before she squeezed his hand as tight as she could and bore down, snapping her eyes shut as she screamed, feeling their dead son get ripped out of her, being born gray and lifeless...

**Present...**

Quinn woke shortly before dawn, her thoughts were cloudy and delayed as she allowed her vision to focus. She had switched her contracts for her glasses before nodding off. Blinking, she saw thin sunlight beginning to pour into the hospital room, catching tiny golden flecks of dust that floated around. That's when she remembered everything all at once. Joe flatlining, the DNR, everything... Her heart froze, before she snapped fully awake and saw Joe laying beside her, still awake, looking so pale and thin beside her. She blinked, feeling confused before she stared at him.

"You okay?"

Joe looked tired, huge circles under his eyes before he nodded and leaned over, gently kissing her forehead.

"Okay..."

Quinn pulled back slightly confused. "Okay what honey?' Joe nodded, before taking one of her hands and squeezing it.

"Okay, let's try and have another baby." Quinn sat there stunned, before a shocked, yet thrilled smile spread across her very confused looking face.


	10. Prom

**Before... **

Joe was building up the courage to ask Quinn out to prom. He had it planned out that he would ask Quinn out after Glee club. Brittany made the announcement that prom would be dinosaur themed, stating she was inspired by "The new girl Joe." who reminded him of a cavewoman. Joe raised an eyebrow, confused by this statement before Mr. Schuester told them to start brainstorming dinosaur songs. Everyone for the remainder of the class basically broke off into different groups when Joe knew next period he would take Quinn to physically therapy. The ride over both joked about the prom theme, and Quinn who knew ten more more songs than Joe did was actually at a loss for even trying to think of any dinosaur songs. They laughed, and Joe felt his heart hammer in his chest, before they arrived to the clinic and both got set up. Today Quinn was trying the handlebars again. Joe stood near her, coaxing her on, ready as she shuffled, gripping the metal bars tight if she fell or needed help. Over the last few months he had been going with her every time, and felt that the two had become close, even after their little talk. He wondered if she would actually say yes if he asked her to prom, and despite the fact she was about to graduate, maybe...just maybe they could become something more.

Today he walked beside her, watching in amazement as she shuffled down between the metal bars.

"Good, now let go...you got this, I promise you'll be okay...look at you, this is all you!"

He watched in amazement as she actually began to walk.

Then he saw her lose her balance.

"No, no, no!"

He wasn't fast enough as she fell forward onto the mat, giggling.

"Are you okay?!"

"Yeah I'm okay."

"I knew you could do it, that was fantastic!"

Quinn hiked herself up on her elbow and smiled up at him.

"Thank you for always going with me."

"Totally selfish. I get to hang with you. Take a break and then we'll show everyone...Glee..."

Quinn smiled and shook her head.

"No no..."

"Why? This is huge..."

"Because it has to be real. I mean, you know maybe if I practiced enough maybe I could walk into the choir room or at prom...just promise not to say anything until then."

Joe smiled.

"You're going to be dancing at prom."

He offered his hand, and helped her up. They practiced some more, and it was clear how much stronger she was getting. Thrilled, he couldn't wait to ask her. Once he helped her into her chair, he started pushing her towards the direction of the parking lot.

"Um Quinn?"

He stopped pushing, knowing it would be better if he was facing her. Taking a deep breath, he waited for a second before walking around. Staring down at her, he nervously chewed on his bottom lip, he stood in front of her, nervously fixing the strap of his messager bag, before looking down at her.

"Um...so prom is coming up. I know you and Finn are doing a campaign for prom king and queen...but I was wondering if...like if you want to...maybe I could pick you up and...while Finn is dancing with Rachel and...well...maybe we could go together?"

He felt his heart freeze in his chest, waiting for her to either gently shut him down, stating that she simply didn't think of him that way, or some excuse because of Finn. He knew they were just friends, but still...how could he complete? He stood there, ready to get crushed, when instead a smile spread across Quinn's face as she stared up at him.

"Sure, I mean...I gotta dance with Finn if we wanna rack up those votes, but absolutely I would love to go with you."

Instantly pure relief swept through his face, before he nervously laughed.

"Really?!"

Quinn nodded.

"I would love to."

Grinning, Joe knew there was no containing how happy he was at that exact moment. Mentally he thanked God, before the biggest smile spread across his face as he stared down at her.

"Um, awesome! This is great!"

Quinn smiled staring up at him.

"As long as you don't mind pushing me around, I'm kinda dead weight..."

Joe smirked and shook his head.

"Never, like I said...keep practicing and you'll be getting stronger and stronger every day."

"Yeah, but what if I'm not walking by prom?"

"Then you'll be just as beautiful. I'll be the luckiest guy there...honestly."

"You don't mind about Finn?"

Joe smiled and shook his head.

"Not at all."

Quinn smiled, before Joe circled around and pushed her out of physical therapy. That night Joe felt like he was on cloud nine. Fr truly the first time in what seemed like forever, he felt as if he was truly a teenager. Here he was, this weird nerdy home schooled kid who had never had a date, let alone ever have the chance to go to prom with one of the most popular girls from school. A cheerleader, Christian, wonderful singer, and overall one of the most beautiful girls he had ever laid eyes on. When he got home that evening, he couldn't contain himself. The second he got home he burst in through the back door that opened up to the kitchen. Tossing his bag down on the small table that his parents used as a "breakfast nook" and grinned from ear to ear as he raced over to his mother who was mixing up cake batter into a bowl for later tonight. He adored his mother, in fact he wasn't shy to admit that she had been his best friend up until recently. His parents were both kind, down to Earth, hippies if you really had to put a label on them. Both had raised Joe to follow his beliefs, be a good Christian, be a good person, and just overall be a good to others the way you wanted to be treated. They always fully supported him, loved the fact Joe was different, and fully embraced his "look" as well as the tattoos, and musical talent. He felt he could talk to his mother about absolutely anything. He knew his parents had trouble having him, and that his mother nearly miscarried him several time throughout her pregnancy. She constantly called him her "angel" since against all odd, he survived.

He felt he had a cool relationship with his mother, who instantly wanted to know if there were any pretty girls at school after his first day. When he first told her about Quinn, she smiled as she listened about his first day before playfully hitting his arm.

"Awwww, you like this girl!"

Joe of course blushed and brushed it off, but he knew she was right. He was getting a pretty bad crush, and having feelings he had never felt before. They only became more intense after Quinn's accident and they began hanging out all the time.

"Mom! Mom! Guess what?!"

His mother raised an eyebrow, holding the bowl before smiling and setting it down.

"What baby?"

Joe felt his heart hammering in his chest, he truly had never felt this excited before in his entire life. The whole ride over back home he kept replaying the moment she said yes over and over and over again in his mind. He knew this would certainly never forget this moment for the rest of his life. Smiling, he stood up proudly, ready to burst with pride and excitement pulsing through him.

"So...I asked Quinn to prom, and she said yes!"

Instantly his mother's eyes widened, as her whole face lit up.

"Oh my God honey! That's amazing!"

She hurried over, throwing her arms around him, squeezing him tight. Laughing, Joe pulled back and nodded, feeling like a kid on Christmas.

"Yeah, I asked her at therapy. She's still up for prom king and queen with that Finn kid from Glee club, but she said she wants to go with me!"

"Oh that's great! We gotta find out what color her dress is!"

Laughing, Joe and his mother started talking a mile a minute, before his mother insisted on Joe digging out his phone to show her a photo of Quinn. The second she looked at the first photo on his roll of the two of them by their lockers, her mother swooned.

"Oh my goodness! She's gorgeous!"

Smiling, Joe continued staring down at the photo of them before smiling.

"Yeah...she is."

**Later...**

When Joe arrived at Quinn's that Friday, he felt a million butterflies in his stomach. His parents had been wonderful, and made him promise that he got Quinn's mother to take photos since they had church group tonight. His father had helped him rent out a tux, and his mother picked a beautiful wristlet of white and purple flowers for him to give to Quinn that matched the color of her dress. She also picked out a single white rose to put onto his tux jacket. When his mother answered the door, she saw her surprised expression the second she saw his hair. Used to those types of looks, he nervously held the plastic container that held Quinn's flowers, before smiling.

"Hello Mrs. Fabray, pleased to meet you."

He offered his hand, and after a second looking a little taken aback, before blinking and smiling, taking his hand and shaking it.

"You must be Joe, thank you so much for taking Quinn tonight."

"Yeah, and being able to load up my wheels..."

Both Quinn's mom and Joe looked, turning as Quinn wheeled over, looking absolutely beautiful in her violet prom gown. Joe felt his breath catch, before Mrs. Fabray stood back, as Joe entered, his eyes transfixed. Quinn smiled.

"You clean up nice Mr. Hart."

Joe stood back amazed.

"You look beautiful..."

Quinn smiled before Joe nervously held up the container.

"Hope it matches, my mom helped me pick it out."

"I love it."

She held up her hand as Joe fumbled with the container, Mrs. Fabray taking it from him. Nervously thanking her, he hated how his hands were shaking as he slid the wristlet over her hand, seeing how perfectly it matched. Smiling, Quinn admired it.

"Perfect."

Mrs. Fabray took a million photos for the two of them, some of Joe squatted next to Quinn, others of him standing beside her. She even took Joe's phone and took plenty of photos for his parents. Once they were done, Mrs. Fabray handed Quinn her shawl, before wishing them a good night. Joe wheeled Quinn down the installed ramp, and carefully helped her into the car. The second her arm went around his neck, he could smell her sweet perfume, and hated how nervous he felt. Once she and her chair were loaded in, he climbed in himself, and started driving towards school. They talked, mostly about how crazy Brittany's dinosaur theme was. Just as they pulled into the crowded parking-lot, Joe killed the engine, before turning towards her.

"How are you feeling?" He wanted to straight out ask about her walking, but Quinn just softly smiled and shrugged.

"Good..."

Knowing, he didn't want to push any further, he got out, circled around and unfolded Quinn's chair, before helping her into it. Pushing her in, he felt like the luckiest guy in the whole school. The second they entered the gym, hearing the loud blasting music, and seeing all of the dinosaur props, both laughed, before Finn spotted them and hurried right over.

"Hey Quinn!"

Quinn seemed to light up, before Finn leaned down, kissing her cheek.

"You look beautiful..."

Joe hated it, but instantly he remembered a few days ago when he saw Finn pushing Quinn down the hall after glee club after Santana ripped into Rachel about her anti-prom party she was holding. Seeing them together, he hated the surge of jealousy that hit him. Rory must have seen it, and simply led him away. As they started walking towards their next class, Rory could see how bothered Joe was.

"It's okay, I think it's just so they win prom king and queen, I wouldn't let it bother you brother..."

Rory said in this thick Irish accent. Sighing, Joe knew what he was feeling was wrong. It was a sin to be jealous. Quinn wasn't his girlfriend, both had established that. Still, seeing Finn pushing her to her next class instead of him hurt...in fact it hurt a whole lot more than it was supposed to. Now watching Quinn and Finn talking back and forth as if he wasn't even there hurt just as bad. Finn hadn't even acknowledged him. He watched as senior started coming up to them, gushing over how adorable Finn and her looked. Standing back, Joe gulped, before Quinn muttered she would be right back when somebody was talking to Finn. Joe went to push Quinn, but she simply smiled over her shoulder and shook her head.

"No I'm good. I'll meet up with you later."

Joe stood back stunned, before Sam clapped him on the back, surprising him. Joe watched Quinn continue rolling into the crowd, nervous that somebody might knock into her. Instead, he stood back and smiled at Sam.

"Looking sharp teen Jesus! You ready to prep to perform?"

Joe smirked, knowing maybe it was just for the best to leave Quinn be. She had plenty of friends she wanted to say hi to, and it appeared Finn was here to keep an eye out on her. Sadly nodding, still watching her, he turned to Sam and smiled.

"Absolutely, let's do it."

"Alright alright, alright..."

Sam said with a Southern accent, leading him away.

**Later that night...**

It certainly had been a truly eventful prom. Finn had freaked out, trying to confront Quinn about walking. Both him and Joe had gotten this close before coach Sue had broken them up. Joe tried to check on Quinn, even wheeling her away from the craziness of the dance floor, before sighing.

"You okay?"

Quinn sighed before nodding.

"Yeah...fine..."

Before he could say another word she wheeled away. Sighing, he stood back feeling helpless. Later, she wheeled back to him and seemed different. She had been busy counting the votes for prom queen with Santana. Looking at him, she had a strange smile on his face.

"Wheel me to stage?"

Joe hated to admit it, but he couldn't help but smile. As upset as he was, he couldn't help but smile seeing that look in her eyes. Pushing her to stage, he made sure she was okay before going back to the crowd. It was there Finn and Rachel won prom king and queen, and just by looking at Quinn, he knew she had something to do with it. Smirking, he watched as Santana and her began to sing the song "Take my Breath Away." from some movie everyone in Glee kept talking about that Joe was too shy to admit he hadn't seen. That's when he saw Quinn slowly stand, finally having her moment as everyone gasped in amazement as Santana and her held each other up as Joe watched from the audience, unable to stop smiling. By the end of the night Quinn was so busy with all of her friends gushing over her about being able to walk. He knew he wouldn't bother her, and ended up taking a goofy photo at the photo-op with the fake plastic dinosaur with the guys. When it was time to go, Sam mentioned a bunch of them were all going to grab breakfast at the 24 hour Dennys on the outskirts of town. Wheeling Quinn out, he mentioned it to her, asking if she needed to be back at a certain time? Instead, Quinn shrugged and said no. He went to help her into the car, when Quinn shook her head.

"Let me..."

Joe stood back.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, just watch me in case I fall."

Joe nodded, before Quinn carefully got up with Joe's help. She took her time, before she stood before standing and very slowly shuffled to the door. Joe smiled, watching her, arms out ready for her to fall, before she opened the door, and eased herself into the car. Joe smiled, before putting the chair back into the back seat. Getting into the car himself, he sat behind the wheel for a second before Quinn sighed.

"Sorry about tonight..."

Joe raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"I barley danced with you...or took a photo with you in there...and the fight with Finn. Guess I was pretty selfish and a pretty bad prom date. Sorry."

Joe sighed before shaking his head.

"Listen, it's okay. What you did back there with Rachel was amazing...and look at you...you're walking. I knew you could do it."

Instantly Quinn sighed before she looked at him.

"I'm walking because you always stuck with me...despite what a brat I was. I was really awful to you...I wasn't a good date. I'm sorry."

Joe stared at her before finally he gulped, knowing It was now or never. Sighing, he stared at her.

"What are we?"

Quinn blinked.

"What?"

"You said before we were something different. I know I made it clear about my faith, but...I think we like each other. I know you're graduating soon but..."

Before he could finish, Quinn leaned over, and placed her soft lips against his, kissing him firmly. Joe was a little caught by surprise, before finally Quinn pulled back, slightly flushed and breathless.

"How was that?"

Joe sat back stunned, before color flickered across his face. Looking completely taken off guard, he nervously laughed.

"That was...my first kiss."

Quinn looked stunned, remembering all that time ago when they nearly kissed in physical therapy. She had to admit, Joe was truly the first guy in forever that seemed different. He saw past the fact Quinn had been in a wheelchair over a stupid mistake, never even batted an eyelash when she told him about Beth. He never called her out for being a brat, or self-centered. No, instead he had spent all this time sticking by her side. He helped her learn to walk again, find her confidence, and tried to show her a wonderful time while she ran off with Finn, and stirred up all this drama just to have her moment. In the end, she had it, but was also able to try and redeem herself by allowing Rachel the moment she knew she so badly needed, and so badly deserved. Prom was a success, but now as she looked in Joe's eyes, so happy and thrilled that she was actually walking.

After how awful she was throughout the night to him, he was still by her side, defending her honor, making sure she was okay, constantly looking after her, and after he spent half the night alone, he still seemed so proud when she stood up on stage. Still, he was forced to take his silly prom photo with the guys. She nearly got him into a fight, and after performing, he spent most of the night not dancing with her, no instead he had to watch her from afar. Joe was sweet, innocent, and truly did care about her. Smiling at him, she reached forward, and ran her hand over his tied back dreads. Their eyes locked before, Quinn smiled.

"What do you think about us dating?"

Joe raised an eyebrow.

"Seriously?"

Quinn smiled.

"Yeah..."

Smirking, Joe leaned forward, kissing her, before he pressed his forehead against hers. Here, sitting in his car was the beginning of it all. To Joe, this was absolutely the best prom ever.

**Present Later that week...**

Quinn sat across from Kurt, Blaine, and Rachel. Jesse was back at the hotel they were staying at, making calls for the latest show he was set to appear in. Sam had a PTA meeting he had to stay late for at school, but promised to meet up with them afterwards. They all arrived a little less than an hour ago, and Kurt had brought coffee for all of them along with muffins. When they arrived Quinn actually was thrilled to see them. These past few days Joe actually seemed to be doing better. Since that horrible evening where he flatlined, there hadn't been anymore scares. He was still very weak, but ever since they both had the "talk" he actually seemed in higher spirits than usual. Just this morning he insisted that Quinn take him in the wheelchair out to the courtyard. It was a beautiful late spring day, and the Japanese cherry blossom trees were blooming. She wheeled him around, before stopping in front of a bench where she sat down across from him.

"God, remember how much you used to push me around? Guess we're full circle here."

Joe smirked, practically floating in his gym shorts and his baggy T-shirt. He looked thin, but somehow that old twinkle that used to sparkle in his hazel eyes when they were younger was still there. Smiling, he reached across and squeezed her hand.

"So, Nancy said in abut fifteen minutes she's on shift...she doesn't need to come in for checks for at least a half an hour..."

Quinn's eyes widened as she laughed.

"No way, you didn't ask her..."

Joe smirked before shrugging.

"Hey, no better time than the present."

Giggling, Quinn looked off to the side as birds started to chirp nearby. Afterwards, once Nancy got Joe settled, she winked at him before loudly announcing to both him and Quinn that she would be at her desk and make sure nobody disturbed him so he could get some rest. Quinn thought she would melt into the floor by pure embarrassment, cheeks burning, as she smiled staring down at the floor before the door was shut behind her. Sitting in silence for a few seconds, Joe cleared his throat, making her look up.

"You're going to have to get on top...that okay? I know it's not ideal..."

Quinn smiled, standing up, nervously rubbing her palms against her skirt she was wearing.

"I think we'll manage. You sure you're up for this?"

Joe smiled staring up at her, before looking a little embarrassed himself before shrugging.

"Listen, I might...need a little help, you know, to get things started. It's these stupid meds I'm on..."

Quinn knew exactly what he was getting at, and softly smiled before she carefully slipped out of her flip-flops, before very carefully balanced on one foot, before she reached up and pulled her panties off. Smiling, she saw Joe closely watching, before she tossed them into her bag. Laughing, she motioned with her head to the door.

"You sure we're not going to be interrupted?"

Joe smiled.

"Nancy is good, she'll make sure nobody comes in trust me."

Quinn lightly laughed, before sitting down on the edge of the bed. Looking at him, she smiled, before she reached and slowly slipped her hand through the front opening of his basketball shorts. Finding his penis, she wrapped her hand around it, and felt him slightly stiffen, before she slowly began to move her hand up and down, squeezing and letting go. The sound of lightly slapping skin, along with the beeping of his machines. Joe began to breath hard, as he watched her, eyes transfixed as her hand began to quicken its pace. Finally, she knew she had to act, and act fast. Seeing his penis begin to respond, she smiled feeling giddy with excitement as she climbed slowly on top of him. Trying her hardest to be careful, she helped him pull his shorts down, before she stared down at him.

"Okay?" Joe licked his lips and gulped, looking just as nervous as she did.

"Yeah..."

Quinn hated to admit it, but she so badly missed having sex with her her husband. They had fooled around a little bit, in fact she remembered the two of them even getting walked in on a few months ago when Joe who was pretty high on pain meds felt pretty frisky, and the two tried to keep their voices down when the door suddenly opened. Betsy, one of Joe's nurses had come in and as soon as she saw the position Quinn was in, she gasped, snapping her eyes shut, and stumbled backwards.

"Oooo! I'm so sorry!"

Quinn whipped her head up, absolutely mortified, before Joe grabbed his covers and covered himself before Betsy shut the door, leaving them alone. Both beyond embarrassed, before both stared at each other and started cracking up. Hanging off each other, they couldn't stop laughing. Lucky for them, Nancy who was like a mother to Joe, understood they were a young married couple, and got the hint, giving them a half an hour alone. Quinn was determined to make the best of it. She knew how frustrating this was for him since he was hard for him to either last long enough, or keep a hard-on. Still, she remembered their wedding night all those years ago. For years they tiptoed around their needs. She grew frustrated herself, but respected his beliefs and how strongly he felt about his faith. Twice they got close, but each time Joe knew enough that it didn't feel right, and as much as he wanted to, he just couldn't go through it. They did plenty of stuff to meet their needs, Quinn showing him how to use his body to feel good without going all the way.

She loved how for Joe every experience for new for him, and on their wedding night, both staying at a beautiful hotel room in Key West. Quinn had changed into a white silk lace lingerie she had bought special, pinning her hair up, with tiny curls fallen and framing her face. She had gotten ready in the bathroom, quickly going over her legs with her razor in the shower and freshened up, thinking how crazy the past forty-eight hours had been completely insane. She felt still giddy from the excitement of today, which went so perfect, like a fairytale. They had flown to Key West International airport, which was a tiny little place, and had rented a car and went straight to the hotel. They had a light dinner, and a drink, before headed to their beautiful bridal suite. Joe had said he was going to change, and open a bottle of wine. Joe rarely drank, but wanted to make a toast for the two of them. They had spent a good portion of the evening standing on the balcony. Joe standing behind her, his arms wrapped around her, resting his chin on her shoulder as they stared at the view of the ocean as the sunset and the sky turned a stunning velvet blue. Quinn went and got ready and couldn't believe how nervous she was. She applied light makeup, before taking a deep breath, wondering if Joe was just as nervous as she was. Smiling, she stared down at her sparking wedding ring, she knew it was now or never and went in to see her husband.

That night was certainly something she would never forget. Joe took to sex like a fish would to water. It was truly amazing, and by the end of it, their wedding night turned into morning and finally Joe rolled off Quinn, dreads hanging down, sweating, and gasping for breath just as loudly as she was. He rolled over, laying beside her as Quinn laid there, breasts heaving, before she turned towards him and smiled, her face flushed.

"Wow..."

"Are you okay?"

Joe asked, his eyes concerned. Feeling her heart flutter, she loved how he kept asking her this every time he entered for whenever they got started, to each time they climaxed and finished. Smiling she nodded.

"Yeah, I'm better than okay...I'm amazing."

Joe blushed smiling, before he reached over and cupped her breast before leaning over and deeply kissing her. Their lips smacked loudly, before she felt his penis begin to twitch against her leg. Smiling, she pressed her forehead against his. That's when he started to kiss her again, faster and harder, slowly starting to roll his body almost over hers. Laughing, Quinn pulled back slightly and shook her head.

"How do you have any fluids left in your body? I'm exhausted."

Joe smiled through the kiss, before pulling back and hiking himself up on his elbow.

"Sorry, I just...can't stop. I wanna be inside you again."

Quinn giggled, before she pressed her hands against his chest, deeply kissing him again, before pulling away.

"That sounds amazing, in fact...maybe in an hour or so we can take a nice cool shower together before we head down to the beach. Let's just lay here for a little while, I'm beat."

Joe smirked before leaning over and kissing her again. Pulling her close to him, he wrapped his arms around her before pulling her close. Smiling, she snuggled in close, laying her head against his chest, as the nice relaxing sleep from a night of nonstop sex came over her. Laying there, she listened to her husband's breathing, feeling absolutely content. To her, this was honestly the happiest she believed she had ever felt in her entire life.

Now, Quinn found herself years later, slowly easing herself down against Joe's erection which was sticking up. She hated how thin and frail he was, but she could tell this meant the world to him, and actually seemed a little like his old self. She also knew the chances of her to actually have sex with her husband were running low, and after the scare they had, it truly showed how little time they had left. If there was any chance whatsoever if he could get her pregnant the old fashion way she wanted to take it. They had all ready spoken about how later this week he would donate a semen sample to keep at the clinic in case they needed to go the other route. As she felt him enter her, she closed her eyes, feeling that same wonderful pressure as she carefully eased herself down, before opening her eyes and staring down at him. Nervous, she hoped she wasn't too heavy for him, or was hurting him. Looking down, she saw his eyes were shut.

"You okay?"

Joe nodded quickly, eyes still shut.

"Give me a second...I'm gonna cum...hold on..."

Quinn nodded, staying perfectly still, after a solid minute or two finally he opened his eyes and nodded.

"Okay, just so slow."

Quinn smiled, before very gently moving her hips. Joe responded by trying to roll his hips against hers. Joe grunted, before she tried moving slowly up and down, when suddenly Joe's face became flushed.

"No, no, no, no..."

He snapped his eyes shut, before he cried out. Quinn felt the warmth of him climaxing, before Joe cracked open his eyes, and looked both humiliated, as well as defeated.

"Sorry..."

He muttered. Quinn smiled, knowing he tired his best. Leaning down, she gently cupped his face before she kissed him.

"That was great."

Joe sighed staring up.

"Yeah right..."

Quinn shook her head.

"No, I mean it...we actually had sex."

"Yeah for like...ten seconds."

"Ten seconds where my husband got to have sex with me, and maybe...just maybe got me pregnant."

Joe sadly smiled before nodding and reaching up and lacing his hand into hers and giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Give me a few minutes, maybe we can try again?"

With that Quinn smiled. Now a few days later, she sat in her kitchen with her good friends. They were all planning on visiting Joe tonight with Jesse and Sam. For the last few days Joe had been eating a little bit more, and his levels were up. He seemed in good spirits, and not as tired as he usually was. He had given a semen sample, and since that day in the hospital, they had tried and had sex one other time. It didn't last long, but having this small connection with her husband made her feel closer to him. She knew the chances weren't good, but she prayed somehow...just somehow...they had made a baby. Catching up with everyone, she smiled listening to them, so happy to hear Kurt and Blaine talk about how great things were going in New York, as well as Rachel and Jesse. She hated to admit it, but deep down inside she felt a little jealous.

Here were two couples, happy with an actual future together. Here she was, having to carefully plan out trying to have sex with her sick dying husband in a hospital bed with their favorite nurse making sure nobody interrupted them. Trying so badly to get pregnant again after their own baby died years ago. She knew when Joe died she would be all alone, and the very idea of trying to make a baby so she would have a little part of Joe with her made her fully see that she was in fact losing him. Still, this morning he seemed in a great mood, and actually seemed excited to hear everyone was coming to see him. Sitting here, she smiled listening before Blaine smiled holding his coffee.

"How's Joe doing?"

Quinn sighed.

"We had a pretty bad scare earlier this week, but as of right now his levels are up...and he's doing okay."

Rachel sadly smiled.

"It will be good to see him."

Quinn smiled before looking at them.

"I shouldn't say anything...and please don't repeat, but...we're actually trying again for a baby." Here Quinn was greeted with stunned expressions.


	11. The first time

**Before... **

Quinn laid back in the massive king sized bed in their honeymoon suite in Key West Florida. Slipping out of her panties underneath her white lace teddy, she was rewarded by Joe's reaction when she stepped out of the bathroom. He stood in just his shorts, his flat stomach, the tiny bit of hair that trailed from his bellybutton, down to the waistband of his shorts. His tattoos that scattered his arms, shoulders, and chest. His dreads were loosely tied back, holding two glasses of wine, his glass barley filled, while Quinn's was filled much higher. The A.C unit was on, and Joe had lit some candles on the wooden shelf that sat behind the massive bed that sat in the center of the room. The balcony's doors were open, the curtains gently blowing in the white silk curtains from the cool ocean breeze that had drifted in. The second she stepped out, Joe's jaw nearly dropped to the ground, his eyebrows raised, his eyes bugging out of his head.

"Wow..."

Quinn giggled, color filling her cheeks.

"You like?"

Joe set down the wine glasses onto the table nearby and smiled staring at her and nodded, his eyes slowly looking her up and down. Quinn smiled, seeing his fresh tattoo, wrapped around his ring finger on his left hand of her name. She nervously played with her own engagement ring and wedding band, and stared at him.

"Are you ready?"

Joe took a second, before doing a double take and gulped. Nervously he rubbed the back of his neck and just stared at her.

"Yeah, I mean...of course...if you are?"

He shut his eyes, looking as if his rambling was both painful and embarrassing. Instead, Quinn smiled, walking over, taking long strides before reaching him. Loosely she put her arms around his neck, standing on her tip toes and softly kissing his full lips. Closing her eyes, she moaned as her tongue flickered into his mouth, darting, and tasting, as he slowly responded as began to kiss her just as hard. Breathing hard, Quinn felt down below tingle, knowing she wanted him now, she pulled back, their lips smacking, as they locked eyes.

"Let's get into bed."

Joe nodded quickly, before Quinn took her wine and drank it down in almost three big gulps. Once she finished, she offered Joe his, who took a sip, before setting it down. Quinn went to the bed, and pulled back the soft smooth sheets, before she slipped her panties off, and laid back in bed, laying there in the center. She watched Joe before he went over to his side. Carefully, he pulled down his boxers, before looking back over his shoulder at her, color filling her cheeks. Quinn knew he was scared, as well as more than a little nervous. She wanted to make sure this was perfect for him. She planned on doing plenty of foreplay, but at this exact moment, she wanted his first time to be done with her, no nonsense to make him nervous, or tripped up. She wanted him to feel good, and there would be plenty of time to experiment, but right now more than ever, she wanted him inside of her. It felt as though she had waited forever for this moment to happen. She had been patient, as frustrating as it had been. She remembered countless nights of him staying respectful, moving her hands away from his crotch, or whenever things were getting too hot and heavy, simply shaking his head and saying no. She knew his faith was important, and as frustrating as it was to have such a handsome looking boyfriend, and then fiancé', was the fact she couldn't truly enjoy his body.

This resulted in them breaking up for that terrible few months when he was still in school. She remembered how many nights she would leave him, horny, and worked up, having to simply touch herself to relieve herself from this building need she felt for him. Now after all this waiting, here they were. Properly married, and ready to take him virginity on their wedding night. Staring at her husband, she smiled before she reached out and touched his arm.

"You okay?"

Joe nervously smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, just...I wanna make sure I'm...good. I don't want to disappoint you."

Quinn smiled and shook her head.

"Never."

Joe sighed.

"It's just...you've been so patient. I know how hard this has been...and...I just...wanna be a good husband."

Quinn squeezed his hand.

"You are a wonderful husband, and I thank God that you came into my life. Now remember...we're in this together. We have the rest of our lives to figure everything out. I'm crazy about you Joe, and we'll figure this all out...now get into bed."

Joe cracked a smile, before he leaned in and softly kissed Quinn. Gently cupping her face, their mouths moved against each other, before he snapped his eyes shut and pressed his forehead against hers.

"I love you so much Quinn. Thank you for being my wife."

Quinn suddenly became overcome with emotion. Smiling, she struggled with tears before she sighed, inhaling the clean scent of his soap and cologne he wore earlier durning their wedding.

"Thank you for being my husband and making me a better version of myself."

A few minutes later, Joe carefully crawled into bed and hovered above her. Quinn took his hand gently and placed it on her plump round breast that was heaving through the lace material of her nightgown. Laying there, she watched his amazed reaction as his hand felt her soft flesh, and instantly she saw his penis start to twitch, raising from the mass of hair between his legs under the sheets, right above her. She saw it, and felt it lightly touch her belly. Smiling, she spread her legs. Joe looked filled with panic, before she smiled.

"Ready? Nice and slow?"

"I don't...wanna fall on you..."

"It's okay, just lay down on me like this..."

She helped him lay down against her, suddenly the feeling of his weight against her made her suddenly very turned on. Feeling high on some drug, her pupils dilated, staring up at him, before she leaned up and started franticly kissing him, starting with his throat, his Adam's apple, up to his jawline, faintly feeling stubble all ready coming in, to his cheeks, and to his lips. Sucking on his skin, and tasting it, she gasped for breath, before nodding and staring up at him.

"Okay, ready?"

Joe gulped, looking scared, before nodding.

"I won't hurt you?"

Quinn smiled and reached down, her fingers lightly grazing his penis, feeling how wet it felt on the tip. Knowing if she made any sudden movements, he might come right then and there.

"I'll help you, scoot up."

Joe did so, before she took hold gently of his penis, watching his breath catch, before she spread her legs wider, and moved her hips up. There, she told him to relax and push forward. Nodding, Joe swallowed again hard, before showing her he was ready.

"You okay?"

He asked, sounding concerned. Quinn smiled quickly and nodded, positioning him right at her center.

"Push in, go slow..."

Joe nodded, before taking a deep breath, and stared ahead past her, looking deep in thought before he entered her with one quick movement. With that, his entire length filled her. There was the sharp sudden pain of him entering her, almost like a sharp stabbing that throbbed inside of her. Quinn took a second, closing her eyes and relaxing, before she relaxed her hips, laying back, and waited before she opened her eyes as her body adjusted to the size of him which was quite large. She saw his face, his eyes big, as his mouth made a perfectly shaped "O" before he stared down at her, one of his dreads hanging down.

"Am I hurting you?"

Quinn knew if she said she was uncomfortable he would pull out of her without a second thought, and beat himself up riddled with guilt. Laying there, she reached up and held onto his shoulders and smiled, scooting her butt down, feeling his hips, flushed against hers.

"No I'm fine, how are you doing?" Joe brought in a shaken breath and smiled.

"It feels...wow...really...weird."

Quinn giggled raising an eyebrow.

"Weird?"

Joe smirked shaking his head, as his hand absently cupped her breast, his thumb sweeping across the frabic that covered her nipples which were rock hard at this exact moment. Smiling, she felt tingling, before Joe leaned down and kissed her, moaning throughout the kiss. When he pulled away, he shook his head again.

"Not weird, just..."

"Different?"

"Yeah, it's...warm and really tight, it...feels really weird down below..."

"Like a tingling?"

"Yeah, feels good."

"Move in and out, go at your own pace...I'm fine, just make sure you're comfortable."

Joe nodded, looking very overwhelmed, before he leaned down, kissing her again, before his hand brought down the front of her nightgown, now cupping her bare breast, fingers mashing against her warm skin. Laying down against her, he nuzzled his head against the side of her face, against her shoulder where she felt his warm labored breathing. He laid there completely silently for a second, not moving, before she felt his muscular, long legs move a little, his thighs moving hers apart more, before he slowly started to move. Quinn laid there, firmly holding onto his shoulders, as he breathed heavy. She felt him withdraw slightly, then bring his hips back down, he drew in and out, in and out, in and out.

After a few minutes, he suddenly found a rhythm, and Quinn felt herself getting pressed into the mattress and pillows of the bed. He started moving at a quickened pace, thrusting in and out, making the bed slightly creak as he labored breathing, and the sound of slapping skin filled the air. Quinn felt his balls against her as he continued moving in and out, and she suddenly felt completely in charge. They weren't doing anything fancy or crazy, but she had the pleasure of being his first. She was his wife, and she had years of amazing sex to look forward to, teaching him how they could use their bodies for pleasure. Feeling him on top of her, moving his penis deeply inside of her, she started feeling that same tingling building coming. She had never climaxed with any of the other guys she had been with, each time she had to pleasure herself to finish. Now, here she was, doing it missionary position, this being his first time, and she felt herself ready to climax.

Feeling herself sweat, she laid back, panting as suddenly her eyes darted back and forth. His body continued bouncing between her spread legs, before one hand dropped from his shoulder, and went underneath the sheets and found his round firm bare ass. Giving it a squeeze, she suddenly felt herself coming. Eyes rolling into her head, she knew better than to cry out, afraid she might scare him. No, she didn't want him to stop, this pace was perfect. Breathing hard, she laid back when suddenly she felt a full blown orgasm hit her. It shook all over her body, making her shudder in both surprise and pleasure. As if he felt her climax, suddenly his ass started pumping into even much faster. Laying there, she felt his thrusts driving into her faster and faster when suddenly he lightly cried out against her, face buried against her shoulder, as she felt his ass tense, before warmth filled her as he finished.

Quinn laid perfectly still, feeling it kill her, as her husband had just lost his virginity to her, having his first orgasm inside a woman...this woman being her...his wife. After a second of silence, he grunted, before collapsing against her. Quinn smiled, before turning her head and kissing his cheek. Her free hand gently rubbed his warm back.

"That was...amazing."

Joe lifted his flushed face, looking downright exhausted.

"I...didn't finish too quick?"

Quinn shook her head, staring up at him with wonder.

"No...I came."

Joe raised an eyebrow.

"What?" "I came...I've never done that ever before..."

Joe looked stunned.

"Really?!"

Quinn smiled.

"It was amazing...God, are you sure this is your first time?"

Joe suddenly looked serious.

"Of course!"

Quinn laughed and kissed him.

"I know, I'm just teasing. I am serious though...I did cum."

"Like what I just did?"

"It's a little different for a girl but yeah, it was amazing...God...you're so big..."

She playfully flicked her though against his lips, making him smile. He stared down, looking so innocent.

"I didn't hurt you did I?"

Quinn gazed up, completely in love.

"Never...are you okay? How was it?"

Joe smiled, his softened sex still deeply buried inside of her.

"It was intense...amazing. Is it always like this?"

Quinn smiled leaning up kissing him.

"I certainly hope so..."

Laughing, Joe brushed back her hair, before kissing her. Giggling, Quinn wrapped her legs around his waist before laughing and rolling with him in the bed underneath the sheets.

**Present.**

Rachel blinked, holding her coffee looking stunned.

"Seriously?"

Quinn smiled, looking at her friends' stunned expressions.

"Yeah, we had a serious talk and we're trying again. I have an appointment at the clinic next week in case we can't conceive the natural way. I'm actually hoping it may have all ready happened."

She smiled, feeling herself blush before Blaine and Kurt exchanged a look before Blaine smiled and reached across, gently patting Quinn's hand.

"That's amazing Quinn. Good for you guys, I really hope it happens."

Quinn smiled.

"Me too, just please don't say anything at the hospital. Joe is nervous it isn't going to happen and doesn't want us to get our hopes up."

"Are you sure that's the right thing to do right now?"

Kurt, Blaine, and Quinn all at the same time looked over at Rachel who continued holding her coffee looking stunned. Quinn took a second.

"What?"

Rachel nervously smiled.

"It's just...Joe was terminal cancer, and after you lost your son...are you sure this is the smartest thing to do, most of all now?"

An awkward silence settled over the kitchen. Kurt made a face as he sipped his coffee in silence. Blaine looked uncomfortable and cleared his throat, before Quinn took a second before she glared straight across at her. She had grown to somewhat understand Rachel, originally she couldn't stand her, and had to admit she had been pretty jealous when she started dating Finn on and off. It wasn't until after her accident, that she started coming around and actually respected Rachel despite how badly she annoyed her, had become a friend over the years as they matured. She knew how badly it had hurt Rachel losing Finn, and had been so happy that she got a second chance not only with her education as well as a second shot on Broadway which she was working hard to get back on. She was married to Jesse, and even though Quinn originally couldn't stand him, now actually thought they were meant for each other. Both driven, and very happy.

Still, every once and awhile, the same old Rachel Berry reared her ugly head. Trying not to show any reaction in her face, she simply gave a flat blank smile.

"Joe flatlined last week...we nearly lost him. He has good days and bad, but this was a reminder how short time actually is. We thought this through. We originally wanted to try again after...Nash...but Joe got sick. If we can't conceive naturally, we're going to try insemination. If it happens it happens."

Rachel didn't back down, she shrugged.

"I...just...think if Joe dies, being a young single mother let alone a single mother who's recently widowed. I mean just think of..."

"Rachel!"

Kurt snapped, causing Rachel to stop talking instantly. Everyone at the table grew silent, before Kurt took a deep breath and stared at his best friend, annoyed.

"Quinn is a big girl...much like you she's suffered great loss. One beautiful thing about all of us is that we never judge. If God forbid Blaine was sick...or Jesse, I know if there was a chance for us to have a part of them to live on we would take it."

"But..."

Kurt ignored her and went on.

"If it happens it happens. All I know is that it's pretty brave of Quinn to acknowledge the fact that Joe isn't getting better. It's a sad reality of illness. I'll be the first to admit, I was in denial when my father got sick, but he was lucky. Quinn...I can't even imagine what you're going through, but we're rooting for you. I hope it happens...and you won't be alone. That baby will all be our baby, who knows maybe it will come out with a headful of dreads."

At that exact moment Quinn and Blaine cracked up, leaving Rachel to give a small nervous smile.

**Later...**

Blaine and Kurt who were staying with Quinn had unpacked upstairs in the guest room, and were currently in the living room watching Project Runway as they killed time before going to the hospital. Quinn had cleaned up, and was currently in the kitchen finishing loading the dishwasher as Rachel leaned against the counter arms crossed.

"I hope you aren't mad...I shouldn't have overstepped..."

Quinn wiped her hands on a dishcloth and shook her head.

"You're my friend, you're just concerned. If you didn't care you wouldn't have said anything. Trust me, I get how it looks on the outside."

"I just...don't want you to get your hopes up. I mean...anything could happen. Do you...think you could handle being pregnant right after something happened to Joe?"

Quinn sighed.

"Yes...actually I think I could. I think it would help. A little piece of me and him. Joe wanted to be a father so badly..."

"But Quinn...after I lost Finn, I felt destroyed..."

"What would you have done if you found out you were pregnant? Would you have kept it?"

Rachel blinked, thrown off by this question. "Um...of course..."

"Then there's your answer. I know loss Rachel. When Nash died...I wanted to die, and I'm sure it won't be any easier with Joe. He's my soulmate, and helped put a mirror up in front of me when I was younger and I have to be honest, I didn't like what I saw. We've been through so much...I didn't want to believe he was dying. I pitched so many fits, terrified of losing him. Now...I see how much he's suffering. He's half here now...you'll see it tonight. It's hard to stay positive and keep your faith after something like this. Before the age of thirty I will have lost a baby and my husband..."

"What if you miscarry this one?"

Quinn sighed, looking in the direction of the living room where Kurt and Blaine, unaware of what was going on the kitchen, both laughing, snuggled up to each other watching TV. Sighing, Quinn looked at Rachel.

"Then it's meant to be...but I'm going to try my hardest that there's a tiny little part of Joe that lives on. I often think back during our senior year. That magical time between Nationals and graduation. Before everything officially changed. Such a short time, but I truly believe we were all happy...right?"

Rachel stood back, gazing off, before she sadly smiled.

"Yeah, we were."

**That night...**

Having visitors was actually just what Joe needed that night. Quinn hadn't seen him smile and laugh so much in months. When they arrived, they had met up with Jesse and Sam. They all carpooled, and arrived a little after six. Sam, who had all ready met Nancy, laid on the charm, pretending to bow as he kissed her hand. Rolling her eyes, she playfully smacked his head and told them she had brought in some extra chairs for everyone to sit around. They all thanked her before shuffling in. Quinn saw that Joe had changed into black sweatpants, and a plain black T-shirt. His wavy shorter hair had been recently washed, and she suspected Nancy had something to do with that. He actually looked pretty good. He was still painful thin, practically floating in his clothes. He was pale, with brownish circles underneath his eyes, yet he lit up when they all came in.

"Jesus in the house!"

Sam called, causing Joe to crack up from his hospital bed. A sound Quinn had lo admit, she had missed so badly. Sam rushed over, giving Joe a high-five, and Blaine, Kurt, Jesse, and Rachel all lined up, one after another and gave him careful hugs. Rachel hugged Joe the longest, looking on the verge of tears as she sighed loudly, struggling to not have her voice sound uneven which she was failing in doing so.

"It's so good to see you Joe."

Joe kissed her cheek and said he had missed her too. Jesse looked a little uncomfortable, hands in his pockets before sadly smirking.

"How are you?"

Joe sighed looking up at him.

"Just taking it one day at a time man, lots of prayer, wonderful nurses and doctors, and of course my wonderful wife."

Jesse nodded before gently clapping him on the arm. Afterwards they all sat down getting comfortable. Blaine and Kurt had made a small tiny plastic basket for Joe. Inside were different essential oils, hard candies, cream, a small note book and several fancy pens. Blaine explained he had read an article that when people are sick in the hospital it was a proven fact they tend to use more of the left side of their brain, and dream ten times more. He told Joe he should keep it right next to him and if he had any weird dreams to write down anything going through his head before he forgot. Kurt smiled saying maybe he could think of some lyrics or something that way. When he was in the hospital after he got hurt in New York Blaine bought him his own notebook and it actually worked.

Jesse made a crack that maybe that's because of all the morphine they are pumping him with. Rachel shot him a dirty look, before Joe laughed, showing it was all good, before he raised an eyebrow and held up a ball of gray yarn, a small booklet, and two knitting needles. Kurt grinned saying this was his idea. When Burt was in the hospital the first time after his heart attack after he woke up from his coma, Kurt taught him how to knit and now he actually does it off and on whenever he's sitting around watching TV bored. Kurt smiled, explaining that the massive ball of yarn was from one of the best material shops in New York. Smiling, Joe actually looked touched. He rolled the large ball of yarn between his hands and smiled. He looked up at Kurt and thanked him, saying he had been going stir crazy here, and he had always wanted to learn how to knit since his mother loved doing it. The last item in the basket was a framed photo, taken in the choir room all those years ago. Joe smiled, it was in a pretty wooden carved frame, and gazed down at it, a sad smile spread across his face.

Reaching down, he gently touched the glass of the frame, before smirking and turning it around to show Quinn who leaned forward. Instantly Quinn smiled as Rachel and Jesse leaned forward and looked as Joe showed it off.

"Oh my God!"

Rachel said. Joe smiled as he turned the photo back. Quinn got up, sitting beside Joe on the bed, putting her feet up as she brought her arm around him, leaning her head against his as he continued staring down at the photo.

"I remember this..."

Joe softly said as Quinn smiled.

"Wasn't this...the last day of class?"

Rachel lit up.

"Yes! It was after the upperclass men sung to the lower classroom. Kurt you had that camera Carol got you. You were snapping photos of everyone."

Kurt smiled.

"That was a good day."

Joe and Quinn continued staring down at the photo sadly smiling before Quinn smiled and kissed Joe's temple before gently brushing back his thin wavy shorter hair.

"It sure was..."

The photograph that Joe held was of them. It was right after the upperclass men had sung "You get what you give." to the lower class men. It had been such a fun yet sad day, and Kurt snapped a photo of Quinn sitting on Joe's lap, her arms loosely around him, his arms around her waist, both smiling, pressing their foreheads against each other. Kurt had caught this moment without them knowing, but Quinn was certainly happy that he had caught it. Here were two kids, on the verge of everything changing, and so very much in love.

**Later...**

Everyone visiting had certainly raised Joe's spirits even more. Quinn remained on the bed, gently stroking Joe's hair as everyone sat around talking and laughing, remembering everything, and joking about all of those competitions. When it was time to go, Rachel hugged Joe telling him she loved seeing him, and to please text her. He hugged her back, kissing her cheek again and promised. Jesse, who seemed more comfortable, leaned down and hugged Joe. Sam, who had been the life of this little get-together, actually seemed a little sad. His eyes were glistening, and he took a deep breath, before he told Joe he was coming to visit this week and told he was coming by with his Nintendo switches, and was going to challenge him to another race. As of recently, he was bringing in his game systems and teaching Joe everything about them.

Joe who had never played video games growing up was absolutely horrible at them. Just last month he brought in his Wii and tried to play Mario Kart with him. Quinn had never laughed so hard watching Joe attempt to play. She noticed ever since Joe got sick Sam had gotten very close with Joe and often called him like his younger brother. She knew he was very close with Blaine, and called him his best friend, but with him in New York, he had gotten close with Joe, and she sensed he felt horrible over what happened, and that's why he was always around to help Quinn. Leaning down he gave Joe a hard hug and told him he would see him soon. Joe smiled giving him a high five, before hugging Kurt and Blaine and thanking them for everything. Before leaving, Quinn smiled at Joe and saw how pale he looked. As everyone else gathered into the hallway to get ready to go, Quinn sighed and saw how badly her husband looked.

"You okay?"

Joe weakly smiled.

"Good, just tired."

"You need me to stay?"

She gently brushed back his fallen bangs, before Joe shook his head.

"No, I'm just going to get some sleep. I'm exhausted. You have fun with everyone tomorrow...you don't need to come see me..."

"Absolutely not, we're all coming back to bother you. Rachel and Jesse have to leave tomorrow and visit with their dads, but Sam, Kurt, and Blaine wanna come. If you want anything special to eat you text me, I'll bring you anything you want."

Joe thought for a second.

"I would like one Quinn with nothing on it."

Quinn giggled before leaning down and pressing her forehead against his and kissing him.

"Love you."

"Love you too, be careful driving."

"I will, I'll text you."

She kissed him again, before smiling, before gently rubbing the side of his face, before turning and walking out with everyone else. As she walked, Blaine and Kurt put their arms around her, and she knew that they had been right earlier. She wasn't alone durning this...they were her family.

Meanwhile in the hospital room, Joe sat there, holding the ball of yard, and weakly smiled. He had been in a great deal of pain, and could feel himself starting to sweat, knowing Quinn and the others had left just in time. Taking a deep breath, he set aside the knitting needles, before opening the book, and started reading the instructions. Just then Nancy came, as if she knew he was in pain, and had his pain meds ready to inject in his IV bag.

"They all seem so sweet, did you guys have a good visit?"

Joe smiled and nodded, relieved that Nancy was injecting the bag.

"Yeah, great seeing them...really good to have them around for Quinn too."

Nancy smiled before looking down at the ball of yard.

"What's that?"

Joe looked up and smiled, dark circles under his eyes.

"Going to try and learn how to knit."

"I know how to knit, I can show you some pointers."

Joe lit up, all ready feeling the affects of the pain meds hitting him.

"Really?!"

"Yeah, I gotta check in on a few more rounds but I'll come in and pull a chain up. Once you get the hang of it and learn a simple pattern it's like second nature. One of your friends get you that?"

"Yeah, to pass the time..."

"Well what do you wanna make?"

Joe smiled looking down at the ball of yarn. It was good sized, and Kurt had mentioned there were two more balls of it at Quinn's that she could bring over if he actually liked it. He figured that would be more than enough. Smiling he stared up at her.

"A blanket...for the baby I'm trying to have with Quinn."

Nancy, who knew they were trying smiled as Joe smirked and held the ball of yarn.

"Yeah...I want to make a blanket...for my son or daughter."


	12. Falling more in love with you

**Before...**

Dr. Weathers stood in the back examining room as a hysterical Quinn sat on the examining table, head bowed, softly weeping. Just then the door flew open, and in rushed Joe, having been called. He still has his messenger bag slung over his shoulder, wearing a pullover sweater and jeans. Racing in, he went straight to Quinn. Quinn looked up at him, and her cries became even louder, her entire body shaking all over. She cried out what sounded like his name, and something else, but couldn't quite understand. Her words all blurred together, as Joe grabbed her, wrapping his arms around her shaking body, gathering her against him. Right away Joe's own eyes filled with tears, as she continued shaking, burying her face against his shoulder, into his dreads, as her cries suddenly turned into soft helpless yelps. Joe tried to soothe his hysterical wife. Holding her tightly, he looked up at Dr. Weathers, eyes filled with his own tears. Looking completely defeated, he stared at her.

"What happened?"

Sighing Dr. Weather shook her head.

"I'm so sorry Mr. Hart, we were just doing a routine ultrasound and unfortunately...we were unable to find a heartbeat."

Joe blinked as if he couldn't quite understand.

"Wait...he was fine last appointment, how...how did this happen?"

Dr. Weathers sighed.

"We won't know that until we do an autopsy, A thousand different factors should have played in."

Joe blinked, holding Quinn who was now weeping against now softly. Sighing, he stroked her head and blinked his own tears away as he sighed.

"Are...you sure?"

Dr. Weather sadly nodded.

"I'm sorry Mr. Hart. We have grief councilors on hand that can speak with you and we can take the next steps..."

Joe held onto Quinn tighter, and shook his head.

"Steps, what steps?"

"Quinn will need to deliver. We'll sit down and walk you through what our plan is..."

Quinn struggled against Joe, before pulling away and turning and facing her. Quinn's face was flushed, and tears continued to pour down her face.

"Whoa, no, no, no...I don't want to deliver him...can't you do a D&C?"

Dr. Weathers sighed and shook her head.

"You're too far along Quinn, that's simply just not an option."

Quinn sniffled before shaking her head, still being held by her husband.

"Then I want a C-section...and we can wait can't we...I don't wanna...I..."

Her words started to become broken up, as fresh tears began falling down her face. Dr. Weathers simply shook her head, her words soft and calm, but her eyes filled with pity.

"I'm sorry Quinn, but the faster we get him out of you the better. You're at high risk for infection. There's risk for hemorrhaging, and other complications if you get a C-section. Plus, going through what you're going through the recovery for a C-section can take much longer than if you did it naturally. The emotional as well as physical pain might be too much, and I would rather a councilor sit down with you and give you your options on what to do next."

Quinn's lip quivered before she looked down at her perfectly round stomach that pushed against her blouse. Sniffling, she pulled back slightly from Joe, before suddenly her eyes widened as she gasped. Her hands went to her stomach.

"HE'S ALIVE!"

Joe pulled back, eyes frightened and unsure before Quinn held her stomach, pressing in hard, before suddenly her eyes widened as a hysterical crazed laugh came from her. Joe's eyes darted from her to the doctor, unsure. Quinn let out a broken crazed sounding cry and laugh before she held her stomach and looked at Joe.

"Feel! He's kicking!"

Joe got up and went straight to her, hesitating for a moment before placing his hand down and waited. That's when he felt it, a series of the same familiar fluttering kicks he so often felt whenever he felt her stomach as the pregnancy continued. Looking at Dr. Weathers, he looked hopeful.

"I feel something."

Quinn laughed, looking completely crazy as tears still continued to roll down her face as she grabbed his wrist and firmly pressed it against her stomach again, moving it to the gentle curve where the baby seemed to be positioned inside of her.

"See?! I knew he was just sleeping...don't you feel it Joe? It's him, he's kicking!"

Joe still seemed unsure as he looked at the doctor and nervously bit his lip. Dr. Weathers sighed and shook her head.

"It's called fetal phantom kicks, it's just a nerve reaction...usually woman who miscarry can feel their babies kick up until they deliver, it's just dead nerve endings firing off, causing the baby to twitch and feel like it's kicking."

Quinn pulled away from Joe, still silently crying, before both hands went to her stomach as if to protect her dead unborn away. Shaking her head, she looked at them.

"No, no, no, no...he's alive, I know how it feels when he kicks...get the ultrasound machine and check...this was a mistake, he's alive..."

Joe, who looked devastated sighed, hanging his head before he tried to reach out and touch her arm.

"Quinn..."

Quinn flinched back, making the hurt in Joe's eyes look ten times worse.

"NO! Don't touch me! He's alive! Our baby is alive! Go get that fucking machine and check damnit! I know it!"

Dr. Weathers sighed, before she nodded.

"I'll get a nurse to help to to lay back down and I'll get the machine, we might get a better reading if we lower your blood pressure."

Quinn raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

Dr. Weathers turned and opened a cabinet and took out a small glass vial, and a syringe wrapped in plastic. She stripped the syringe free, and filled it with the vial. Joe looked confused, while Quinn seemed suspicious. Her hands still planted firmly on her stomach.

"What is that? I don't want to hurt my baby..."

Dr. Weathers turned, looking perfectly calm.

"This won't hurt your baby. I usually give it to mothers who's anxiety is up or blood pressure. If yours is too high we won't get a clear reading. I'll give this to you and we'll get the machine ready deal?"

Quinn eyed the needle, before nodding. Joe watched as Dr. Weathers walked over, rolled up Quinn's sleeve, and injected her in the arm. Instructing her to lay down on the table, the nurse would be in shortly. Before turning around and leaving she eyed Joe just as the nurse came in, helping Quinn. Joe got the hint and walked out with Dr. Weathers who was getting the ultrasound machine from the other room. In a low voice, Joe whispered...

"The baby's dead isn't it?"

Dr. Weathers sighed, ready to push the cart in before she looked at him and sadly nodded.

"Yes."

Joe felt tears beginning to escape his eyes, he looked at her devastated.

"Then why are we doing this..."

"Because, your wife is going into shock. I gave her a fast acting sedative. She doesn't want to believe that the baby is gone, this is to simply humor her...the shot should be all ready kicking in. I'm calling ahead downstairs and getting her to a room, she should deliver as soon as possible, the longer the baby is in there the more Quinn will be at risk."

Joe allows tears to trail down his face before he sniffled and look at her.

"Can't you take it out C-Section? Does she really have to deliver?"

"I rather not. You're wife and yourself are experiencing one of the worst thing to ever happen. I've sadly had to see at least half a dozen of my patients go through this heartbreak. It's going to be worse for Quinn. Her first baby she had to give up, this baby was with you, her husband. The emotional damage is going to be bad...she may never truly ever go through this. Now Joe, you're a wonderful husband, and I'm sure you're parents and her mother will be there for you two as well as your church, but I'm calling in a grief councilor...this is much bigger and I know both of you are in shock to fully allow to accept it. Quinn is in denial, but the reality is going to come crashing down very fast. C-sections can lead to complications, and the recovery is awful. I don't want her having to go through this while mentally being at an all time low. We might need to even put her on a suicide watch..."

"Quinn would never..."

"Never say never Joe. The faster we do this the better. We can make it as painless as possible, I'll deliver and will be available for her. We can get labor kick stared once she's settled downstairs might it might take hours...she'll probably sleep for awhile after this. You can make any calls you want, and speak with our councilor. I hate seeing two young people who I'm sure would have made wonderful parents go through this, but I swear I'll do everything I can to make this horrible time just a little easier..."

Joe closed his eyes for a second before nodding.

"Okay, let's do this."

Nodding, Dr. Weathers wheeled in the monitor, just as Quinn was laying on the examining table, her blouse pulled up and the nurse gently stroking her arm listening as a Quinn was in the middle of talking about the nursery.

"It's beautiful, gray walls and silver boarders with silver whales...a beach wood crib, it's perfect..."

The nurse smiled.

"It sure does honey..."

Just then she squirted the gel on Quinn's stomach, stepping away and getting the lights. Dr. Weathers turned on the machine, before taking the paddle and pressing it against Quinn's swollen stomach. Joe joined Quinn and took her hand. Quinn, clearly stoned from the shot, looked up at Joe, her eyes glazed as a small tired smile came across her face. Joe had rubbed his eyes hard before walking in, wiping the tears away and forced himself to give a small smile even though he was dying on the inside. Quinn gazed up at him.

"I'm sorry for scaring you honey...just think...we can tell him this someday when he's driving us crazy being a moody teenager. We can tell him how badly he scared us..."

Joe felt as if any second he was ready to break down crying. Instead, he simply stood back and forced a small smile, squeezing her hand as Dr. Weathers turned the screen towards them and moved the paddle. On the screen, suddenly appeared their baby. Joe stared at it and felt his heart ache. Quinn turned, her eyes sleepy and happy as he stared at the screen.

"Hi baby..."

She whispered. Just then Dr. Weathers sighed and eyed Joe. He nodded, before she flicked the switch and that same dead buzzing sound came. Quinn laid there, suddenly her eyes stone set. Dr. Weathers moved the paddle around some more, before sighing and shaking her head.

"Quinn...I'm sorry honey...there's no heartbeat."

Instantly Quinn laid there, her face serious as she weakly shook her head.

"No..."

Dr. Weathers signed.

"Look honey...no heartbeat. I'm so sorry..."

A single tear rolled down Quinn's face as she shook her head again.

"Check again...he's alive, I can feel him..."

"Quinn..."

Joe tried to say, before Quinn looked up in a snap and glared at him.

"You did this..."

Joe raised an eyebrow confused.

"What?"

Dr. Weathers signed.

"Quinn please..."

Quinn stared up at Joe, her lip quivering, fresh tears rolling down her eyes.

"You got me pregnant...you bastard...you..."

She tried to go on, but she simply didn't have the strength. Instead, she snapped her hand away from Joe's, and covered her face with her hands before she began to loudly sob, her entire body shaking all over. Standing back, Joe looked beyond hurt, before he stared at the blank dark screen of the ultrasound and then down at Quinn's swollen stomach. Devastated, Joe simply leaned down and gathered his wife in his arms. Quinn tried fighting him, pulling away from him.

"Get away from me..."

Quinn tried fight him, but Joe wrapped his arms tightly around his wife, feeling her struggles weaken, as she buried her face against his hair, still sobbing as Joe tightly held onto her. Looking crushed, tears rolling down his face as he stared up at Dr. Weathers before he gently rubbed his wife's back.

"Shhhh...it's okay...I'm here...shhhhh..."

**Before...**

Joe had been having a pretty tough time since the breakup with Quinn. For a brief time around Christmas Joe's grades slipped. His parents as always had been beyond understanding, and his mother had even offered if he wanted to go back to being home schooled? Instead Joe said he would try harder, and that he just needed to get over Quinn.

"I should have known better. She was older, and the whole long distance thing rarely ever works, or at least that's what I've heard. Besides, she was way out of my league, it was only a matter of time..."

Before she could finish, his mother gently touched his face, making him look in her direction.

"Don't ever put yourself down like that Joseph. You are a wonderful, kind, handsome, and good person. This is Quinn's loss, trust me."

Joe sadly smiled, even though he didn't feel like it. Christmas was lonely, but he made the best of it. Marley convinced everyone to sing for Sue after she helped Marley's mom out around the holidays. Christmas morning they went to mass, and afterwards Joe's parents surprised him with a nice new case for his guitar and Joe spent the rest of the day playing boardgames with his parents until he received a text that made his heart sink...

It was from Quinn.

_**Merry Christmas Joe.**_

Joe sighed staring down at it. He wanted more than ever to just ignore the text, but instead simply picked up his phone and texted back...

_**Merry Christmas Quinn, take care of yourself.**_

Almost instantly Quinn texted back...

_**Thanks you too. Listen I'm home visiting my mom, do you want to maybe meet up tomorrow or something? **_

Joe felt his heart ache. He remembered Thanksgiving night after they lost sectionals, and after Quinn dumped him, he returned home, grateful that his parents were all ready in bed, changed, and went straight to bed, burying his face in the pillow and completely sobbing. He cried so hard his entire body felt as if it was being shattered from the inside. It went on like this for weeks. He hated feeling slightly angry. He knew to be a good Christian was to simply accept what had happened and try and continue being friends with Quinn. Instead, he knew he just wasn't ready for anything like this. He texted back quickly.

_**Sorry Quinn I can't. Going to be pretty busy with my parents. Have a great New Year, safe travels back to school.**_

He let out a deep breath after he texted that, and within seconds his phone lit up. Oh, ok. Have a great New Year Joe. He was sure she was hurt he wasn't willing to see her, but it still felt too soon. He couldn't count how many times he had absolutely sobbed himself to sleep in these last few weeks. Shortly after everything, Sam had pulled him aside in the locker room.

"Sorry Joe, I heard...you okay?"

Joe bit down on his lip before shrugging.

"Yeah...I guess."

Sam sadly smirked before patting him on the arm.

"Listen, I get it...I've been there. If you ever need to talk I'm here."

Joe nodded gratefully and he simply went through the motions leading up to Christmas break, thinking about how he had originally planned on surprising Quinn up at school with this pretty necklace he had been saving up for by mowing lawns and shoveling walkways up and down his block. Instead, here he was, Glee not going to sectionals, and now single. Nobody asked him to go to the Sadie Hawkins Dance when they came back from break, which Joe wasn't even the slightest bit surprised.

The guys did talk him into going through to help perform. While doing so up on stage, he briefly forgot about all of the pain he was going through. He missed Quinn, and had put everything that reminded him of her in a shoe box. He went to school, went to Glee, put up with the cruel remarks people made either about his looks for hair, mostly from Kitty. He hid the fact these words were getting to him, and simply sat back, no longer asking to sign in groups for even as a solo anymore. He came home, did his homework, did his chores, ate dinner with his parents, went to church, came home, showered, shaved, and went to bed and repeated it. Everything was turning into one long endless day for him now that Quinn and him were no longer together. At the Sadie Hawkins dance he watched everyone dance, and decided to grab snow ball cake and sit down alone when he heard a voice behind him.

"Hey...would you like to dance?"

Joe froze mid bite through the tiny pink cake, turning and saw Lauren. She was a senior now, a heavy sit girl who was in the wrestling team that had once dated Puck. She actually looked cute with a tiny top hat fastened to her hair. Joe smirked, he never looked at people'a appearances, and actually felt pretty good being asked to dance.

"Yes."

Lauren's face lit up and they danced the remainder of the night. Lauren was actually a ton of ton and had him laughing by the end of the night. He knew people were looking, but he simply didn't care. He insisted on walking Lauren to her car afterwards.

"You're quite the dancer teen Jesus."

Joe blushed and laughed softly.

"Thanks..."

Reaching her car, Lauren dug her keys out of her clutch purse.

"So, what's the deal with your and Lucy Caboosey?"

Joe raised an eyebrow.

"Huh?"

Lauren smirked and shook her head.

"Quinn, I heard you two broke up."

Joe thought of Quinn, how he should have known something bad was going to happen when she came back to help Finn for the Thanksgiving performance. He remembered when the guys went to the auditorium to practice dancing, while the girls stayed behind. Joe had smiled, walking towards Quinn, having missed her like crazy. When he kissed her, telling her he would see her later, she seemed stiff, as if kissing him was the last thing she wanted to do. Raising an eyebrow, he sensed something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?"

Quinn shrugged.

"Nothing, I'll talk to you later."

Sadly smiling, she walked past him and all ready Joe had a sense what was going to happen, as much as he didn't want to think about it. That entire practice he felt annoyed, and overwhelmed knowing his beautiful perfect girlfriend was probably moving on without him. Now nearly going on two months later here he was. Feeling his chest ache, he sighed.

"Yeah, guess the long distance thing just didn't work out."

"Yeah well, if you ask me she's a fool...you're smokin'."

Joe nervously laughed, raising an eyebrow confused, before Lauren leaned forward and kissed Joe straight on the lips. Joe's eyes widened in surprise, before Lauren pulled back and winked at him.

"Night Jesus..."

With that, Joe stepped back and smiled watching Lauren climb into her car and drive away. Standing in the empty parking-lot, Joe put his hands in his pockets and signed. Now a week later they had shot and released the Men Of McKinley Calendar. It was Tina's idea to raise money for them headed to the next show. Thanks to Sam and Blaine, they were back in the running, and practicing twice as hard to really make it all the way. This had lifted Joe's spirits somewhat, but the entire time they were getting ready for the photoshoot, Joe felt more self conscience than ever. Usually he was proud of his body, and truly didn't get what all the hype was about the guys taking their shirts off for the calendar.

Sam had actually been pretty mean poking fun at Joe's body several times. Joe proudly told him he was the way God made him, and didn't back down, understanding Sam had bombed his SAT's, and was trying to make up for lack of. He posed for April and May, trying to have fun with how silly the whole thing was. Tina mentioned they were probably going to photoshop most of his tattoos. Really not caring, Joe said sure. Once they were printed, everyone was stunned over how successful they were. A line leading out of the Glee room of girls, crazed and giddy to get a copy from them. Finn had the guys all sit down, willing to sign them for the girls to bought a copy.

Within twenty minutes they learned they had made more than enough money. While sitting here, Joe truly didn't know how to feel about this whole thing. He was never used to anything somewhat sexual like this, and knew he would never tell his parents about it. He knew it was all in good fun, and his parents would have gotten a kick out of it, but he sorta understood where Arnie was coming from. This was a little embarrassing. Still, Joe continued to blush as girls gushed over them, some even giggling and blowing him kisses and asking to touch his hair. Joe had never had this many girls talk to him, let alone give him this much attention. One freshmen even asked if he had. Facebook?

"A what?"

Jake who sat next to him smirked. A few minutes later Lauren slid her copy to him.

"Can you sign this Teen Jesus, and maybe your phone number?"

Joe blinked, surprised.

"Um...sure..."

Lauren leaned in close smiling.

"Hey, how about you...me...Breadsticks Friday night? We can then catch a movie...or just fool around, your move."

Joe's eyes widened, feeling his cheeks burn as Jake held back a giggle. Really not knowing what to say, and not wanting to hurt her, Joe signed.

"Um...listen...I'm really not looking to...see anyone right now."

Lauren glared at him.

"Oh..."

"Yeah, sorry."

Lauren shrugged snatching the calendar away from him and left in a huff. Feeling horrible, he simply sat there before Jake clapped Joe on the arm.

"Don't feel bad buddy, my brother said this chick is full blown insane."

Joe nervously laughed. Still, he felt bad. Afterwards, he apologized to Lauren outside her locker, who was actually pretty cool about it and simply shrugged it off.

"Man that Barbie Cheerleader really broke your heart huh?"

Sighing, Joe nodded, hating that she was right.

"Yeah, I guess she did..."

**Present...**

Blaine and Kurt had a wonderful breakfast with Quinn. The two of them were taking off to visit with Blaine's family, and then to go see Burt and Carol for lunch. They made plans to meet up in the evening, go see Joe, then meet up with Sam and treat her to dinner. Quinn hit the gym, ran a few errands, before making Joe one of her famous smoothies, put it in a to-go cup and changed into yoga pants, and a T-shirt. Putting her hair in a ponytail she headed to the hospital. Nancy was still on shift, and she had brought her a coffee and a donut. Kissing her cheek, Nancy lit up.

"You are just too sweet! Where are your friends?"

"Visiting with family, we're coming back to visit later. How's he doing?"

"A bit of pain earlier, but he's good. Didn't want to eat so try and have him drink half of that smoothie okay darling?"

Quinn nodded, feeling worried, before Nancy playfully hit her arm.

"Besides, I'll make sure no checks for at least...forty five minutes. Maybe try to get him to work up an appetite?"

Quinn blushed before laughing.

"Nancy!"

Nancy cackled before sitting down and starting to pick at her donut. Walking in she shut the door behind her, and saw Joe sitting up in bed. His wavy hair was pushed back behind his ears, and he wore sweats and a T-shirt. The sunlight was floating in through the window, making him look absolutely gorgeous. That's when she saw, he was knitting using the yarn Blaine and Kurt had given him. Smiling, she saw him look over and smile.

"Hey baby."

Quinn smiled walking over, before putting down her bag and walking around and sitting on the edge of his bed. She looked down and saw he had started knitting something. It was only four or so rows in, but it actually looked pretty good. Smiling, she stared down at it.

"Wow! Look at you go!"

Joe blushed a little and shrugged.

"Nancy has been helping me, it's really easy once you get the hang of it. I had to have her help a few times, but it's a good way to stay alert...but I'm taking a break, I just got my pain meds and God knows how tangled this thing would end up looking..."

Quinn snickered before she helped him gather everything, and carefully wrap it up and put it in a bag and put it on his other nightstand.

"What are you making?"

Joe shrugged again before smiling.

"Trying...and I stress trying...to make a blanket for the baby."

Quinn smiled at him, using her free hand not holding the cup to squeeze his hand.

"Are you trying to make me fall even more in love with you?"

Joe smirked, leaning and sipping from the straw from the smoothie she brought. Both locked eyes and smiled, before his other hand reached and started going up before landing on her breast.

**Later...**

Joe said he wanted to be on top. Careful with his IV line, and tubes for his oxygen, they were silent, as Quinn and him carefully positioned himself. She lowered her yoga pants, as he lowered his sweats. He needed Quinn to jerk him off for a few minutes, before he got hard and climbed on top of her, and laid between her two spread legs. The second he entered her, Quinn grasped onto his thin shoulder blades as he started to move, making the hospital bed creak. Joe's ass raised and fell, going in and out of her in a steady rhythm, breathing heavy, as he grunted. Quinn held onto him, enjoying the sensation of friction that was building up. Joe started going in faster. Then, suddenly Quinn felt him twitch inside of her, stiffening, before crying out against her neck, and climaxing. Quinn felt him relax against her, panting for breath as Quinn laid there, listening to the sounds of her husband trying to catch his breath, and the steady beeping of his monitors.

Smiling, she gently kissed his flushed cheek, him very much deep inside of her, both having absolutely no idea that Joe had in fact just moments ago...impregnanted Quinn.


	13. Postive

**Before... **

"Joseph Hart!"

Principle Figgins announced in the auditorium. Quinn stood between Mr. and Mrs. Hart, or otherwise known as Mary, and Paul Hart. Both absolutely adored Quinn, and had been thrilled when they got back together. Standing in a pretty navy blue sundress, Quinn clapped and cheered as the Harts whistled and applauded as Joe crossed the stage in the school's signature red cap and gown, smiling, his dreads tied back as he smiled, and shook hands with Figgins before holding up his diploma. Mrs. Hart completely lost it, clapping like crazy, whistling, and screaming. Quinn giggled over how downright adorable Mrs. Hart was being. Mr. Hart clapped even harder, smiling from ear to ear.

"WOOOO! GO JOE! THAT'S MY BOY! WOOO!"

Quinn got caught up in the excitement and whistled and clapped just as hard between Joe's parents, watching the love of her life graduate, knowing very well that this was another milestone for them. Joe locked eyes with her for just a second, and he grinned, winking down at her. Smiling, she gazed up at him as he joined the others for the seniors of 2014.

**Later...**

"One more baby! You two look so cute!"

Mrs. Hart said holding her phone up outside as the graduates all met with their friends and families for photos. Joe still in his red gown laughed, wrapping his arms around Quinn's tiny waist, drawing her in close to him. Cheek to cheek, they laughed as Mrs. Hart snapped another photo before Mr. Hart smiled and motioned to Quinn.

"Put your hand out, let's see that beautiful ring on this beautiful gal!"

Mrs. Hart rolled her eyes and playfully bumped her shoulder against Mr. Hart as Quinn giggled and held out her left hand, bending her hand down and posing so her brand new and downright gorgeous sparking engagement ring showed. Joe kissed Quinn's cheek as Mrs. Hart snapped another photo of the two of them with Quinn showing off her engagement ring. This photo proudly sat on Joe's nightstand in their home they would later buy.

A photo that Quinn would gaze at with a loving, yet sad smile as she stared at it, always putting her night cream on before bed. Always missing her husband who was across town, stuck in the hospital, and such a far cry from the young and excited man that was displayed in this photo. As always Quinn would stare at this photo remembering how absolutely happy the two of them were. Long before they lost their son, and Joe got sick. Back when happiness and a future seemed possible...

**Before...**

Quinn hated to admit that when she learned Joe wasn't coming to Mr. Schuester's wedding due to having a case of the bird flu that she felt more than a little disappointed. She had spent a whole week picking out the perfect dress and jacket for the event, only to learn that he wasn't making it. Even though the wedding didn't happen, she sat back with Santana feeling bitter watching all of these happy couples celebrating Valentine's Day, remembering that last year she had spent this holiday at Breadsticks...otherwise known as the "Sugar Shack" with Joe, just mere days after he first started at school. She remembered being curious, and more than a little interested in this so called "Teen Jesus" She remembered them dancing that night and watching him loosen up and have fun with everyone. To Quinn that seemed centuries away. More than a little bitter and lonely, she drowned her sorrows in booze, and ended up finding herself in bed with Santana. Both were more than a little buzzed, and decided to throw caution to the wind.

The sex had actually been pretty amazing, and both sat up in bed admitting that this was simply just sex. They fooled around and after several orgasms they laid back laughing and talking, enjoying each other's company. Sitting up in the hotel bed, wrapped in sheets Quinn smiled at Santana before she cocked her head at her.

"You're thinking about Teen Jesus aren't you?"

Quinn smirked and shrugged.

"That obvious huh?"

"Just a tad."

Quinn took a drink of her water bottle and sadly stared down.

"I just can't believe I was such an idiot. Here I found the perfect guy...someone who made me happy, who was a complete gentlemen, didn't judge me about my past, Hell...was one of the main reasons I even got out of that damn wheelchair and what do I do? I screw it up. College is just bullshit just like high school. I keep thinking about him. I have to admit...as much as this was fun, I really wished Joe would have made it tonight. I just want to...apologize for hurting him."

"Then do it."

"What?"

"Apologize. Tell Avatar that you're sorry. That you made a mistake...talk to him Quinn. I know I gave the two of you tons of shit when you were dating, but...I really have to admit, with my third Spanish psychic eye I could tell you two were totally endgame. He's good for you Quinn...honestly."

Laying there, nervously chewing on her lip she knew Santana was right.

**Later that spring...**

When Quinn learned the news of Finn she felt as if she was hit by a truck. Santana had texted her, and now she sat in her dorm-room frozen in place. Suddenly she felt as if she had become a robot which had become unplugged. This weekend was supposed to be Finn's memorial at school. She felt awful that she wasn't going to it, just like his funeral...but she couldn't bring herself. She felt crushed. Finn had been her boyfriend, as well as her friend. Suddenly all that bullshit about trying to trick him when she got pregnant made her feel awful. She blamed herself, and felt as if she was just a selfish terrible person. Puck, Sam, Santana, and Brittany all tried to reach out but she muted her phone. She knew it was awful yet again not to come and pay her respects, to properly say goodbye to Finn, but the truth was she just couldn't seem to bring herself to face the facts that Finn was gone and never coming back. Mercedes had called and after several attempts trying to convince her to come and mourn together, she finally understood that Quinn just couldn't Instead she told her that she was around if she ever needed to talk. Quinn thanked her, and spent that weekend a complete mess. Her roommate was away at her boyfriend's, and she was left sitting in shorts and an old T-shirt, hair unwashed, her face starting to break out, as she laid in bed crying, her curtains closed. She felt terrible. She sent flowers for the funeral, making up some lie about school, feeling awful, but the simple truth was, she just couldn't face the facts that Finn was dead.

She kept thinking about Rachel and knew she just couldn't face her. The very thought of suddenly losing someone like that crushed her. She knew she would have to go to class Monday and pick up the pieces. She knew how bad it looked not making it to Glee club, but she simply didn't care. Instead she just laid around crying, hating that at nineteen Finn was gone.

Then...a knock came at the door.

Looking, her eyes raw from crying she raised an eyebrow. Jessica her roommate was at her boyfriend's and knew to stay away and give Quinn space since for the last month since she received the news she had been a complete wreck, falling into a terrible deep depression. Annoyed more than anything, she was ready to snap at whoever it was bothering her. Getting up, she fixed her hair into a messy ponytail, walking past the crumpled up pieces of tissue and made her way towards the door. Snatching it open, she froze. Joe stood there. His dreads were tied up, wearing a brown shirt and jeans. He lifted his hazel eyes and locked them with Quinn's bloodshot ones.

"Hey..."

This was the first time she had seen him since the breakup. She had been tempted after Mr. Schuester's "wedding" to reach out like Santana said. She kept meaning to, and then this happened. Her eyes widening with surprise, she stared at him.

"Joe?"

Joe sadly smiled.

"I took the train to come see you. I figured you haven't been doing so well after what happened. I just...wanted to make sure you're okay..."

Suddenly the weight of the world came crashing down on Quinn. All of her stress, anger, and grief came down, hitting her like a brick wall. Staring at her ex boyfriend who she missed terribly. Staring at him, she suddenly knew now how short life was. Looking at him, she gulped before tears started rolling her face, unable to stop.

"Joe...I...I..."

Before she could say another word she flung herself against him, completely breaking down in the hallway of her dorm, no longer caring if anyone saw. She felt his strong comforting arms that she so badly missed wrap around her tightly. Burying her face against his shoulder, she sobbed loudly, crying her eyes out like a child. Joe firmly held her, gently rubbing her back as she continued crying, finally allowing herself to mourn Finn.

**Later...**

Joe and Quinn laid together in each other's arms in Quinn's narrow single bed. After finally getting herself under control, Quinn simply laid in Joe's arms, feeling his breath against her neck, smelling the sweet mixture of his soap and hair oil that she had missed so badly. She had cried for almost an hour straight laying there with him, just allowing herself to finally break down and truly face the heartbreaking fact that Finn was in fact dead. She knew she wasn't making much sense as she sobbed to Joe, letting everything out as her stomach ached, and her face became flushed.

"I just don't understand? Finn never did drugs? Why would he do something so stupid at a college party? WHY?!"

Joe listened, allowing her to just repeat the same thing as she cried and cried and cried. Finally once she calmed down, she admitted how awful she felt for not coming home. Joe shook his head telling her that she did what she felt was right. Everyone drives differently, and he's certain that Finn will always stay in her heart and prayers, and as awful as he felt, he felt a little bit better that such a good friend was up in Heaven looking out for them.

This brought on a new wave of tears and Joe held her tighter. Now exhausted and basically all cried out, Quinn laid in Joe's arms, before finally she turned, shifting her weight and facing him. The only light on in the dorm-room was the nightside lamp. Looking at him, she felt her heart flutter.

"I can't believe you're actually here."

"I was worried about you."

Quinn sadly smiled before sniffling and locking eyes with him.

"I'm so sorry Joe. I'm so sorry for hurting you. Ever since we broke up I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. You were the best thing to happen to me and I was selfish. I guess now...I can see how short life really is. I love you."

Joe softly smiled and cupped the side of her face.

"I love you too."

"I wanna get back together with you...if you'll have me."

"Quinn, nothing has changed...I don't want to hold you back..."

Quinn quickly shook her head.

"You never held me back, I was a complete idiot. I love you so much and I don't wanna lose you again."

Joe smiled as she reached and held onto his hand that cupped her face.

"Are you sure?"

Quinn quickly nodded smiling as fresh tears poured down her face.

"Absolutely. I promise I'll never hurt you again."

Joe stared at her before leaning forward. Both closed their eyes as their lips touched and very slowly began to move, opening and closing. To Quinn she had longed for this kiss ever since she watched him walk away in the parking-lot back on Thanksgiving. Her whole body ached for him as she began to kiss him harder, her hand letting go of his and holding onto his hair. When the kiss broke, a thin trail of spit between them. Looking at Joe's flushed face, she smiled before they leaned in closer, pressing their foreheads against one another. They stayed like that for what seemed like forever, before Joe draped an arm around Quinn, bringing her in closer.

They stayed that way all night. In the morning, Joe took her out to breakfast and Quinn was surprised to find she was starving. Once she finished her pancakes she lightly burped before giggling, looking across at Joe who laughed.

"Sorry...guess I was hungry."

"Your body needed it, kinda like being sick."

Quinn nodded before she sighed and stared at him.

"I feel awful not going to Glee club this week, but I just can't face everyone...mostly Rachel."

"They will all understand, trust me. You do whatever helps you..."

Quinn nodded before she sighed and stared at him.

"I can't even begin to think how awful she must feel. I mean we all loved Finn...he was the best, and I know they weren't together...but...if anything ever happened to you I don't..."

Joe reached across and gently placed his much larger hand onto of Quinn's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Shhhh...don't think like that. I promise, I'm never going anywhere."

Blinking away fresh tears, Quinn stared across at her boyfriend, knowing right then and there this was the love of her life.

**A few months later...**

Quinn sat in front of the TV in the common room in her dorm frozen. Several of the other girls were all lounging around watching the report. The same title kept flashing over and over. Shots fired at William McKinley High School in Ohio. None of the reports seemed to really target exactly what was happening. They kept showing the same image from a helicopter showing her old high school over and over again with buses and students evacuating with police cruisers closing off the street. Quinn felt her stomach drop. Just last night she actually fell asleep on the phone to Joe. Ever since they had got back together since Finn's death she had been the happiest she had felt in what seemed like forever.

They called every night, and constantly were texting. Joe had just recently quit Glee club much to Quinn's surprise. When she asked why, he simply said that he had just enough of the cruel remarks and jokes constantly targeted on him. He explained usually the looks, and remarks about his hair, tattoos, and religion never got to him, but as of recently Glee club truly seemed to have changed. He saw a change in Mr. Schuester. All of the solos went to either Tina or Blaine. Everyone kept making mean remarks to Joe, especially a cheerleader named Kitty. The second Quinn heard this her hand clutched her phone tighter. She remembered this girl who had worshiped her when she last visited.

"I'll kill her..."

Joe had laughed over the phone and said there was no hard feelings, Kitty was insecure and took it out on others, still even Sam who he thought was his friend had even made mean remarks. Sugar and him both agreed they were tired of being treated this way, as well as never having the chance to perform even in group numbers. Joe said as much as he loved the club, he needed a break, and when Sugar and him stopped showing up, nobody...not even Mr. Schuester seemed to notice.

Quinn's heart broke hearing this, hating how unfair they were treating him. As always Joe had laughed it off, always turning the other cheek, and not allowing it to get to him. Still, Quinn couldn't believe that those people were acting that way. She knew if she ever saw any of them, she would allow herself the gift of giving them all a piece of her mind. Just last night they had been talking prom. Joe had asked if she wanted to go? Quinn squealed with delight. This would be Joe's junior prom, and she was determined to make it up to him and make sure this one was much better than the last. Since they got together he had visited twice, and Quinn was making plans too visit for the weekend next week and go dress shopping. She missed him like crazy, and had the photo he had gifted her last year on her nightstand. Even Jessica her roommate had to admit he was cute, and Quinn didn't seem to depressed anymore now that they were together. Now she had woken up to a million texts, some of which were from Mercedes, Kurt, and Puck all asking what was happening at school?

Confused, Quinn didn't exactly know what they meant. She got her stuff to go take a shower before class, when Puck texted back saying it was all over the news. There was a school shooting at McKinley. The second she heard this, it was as if her entire world drained of color. Feeling an icy shiver go through her heart,, she raced to the common room and saw everyone watching the news. Jessica turned and nervously stared at her.

"Isn't this where Joe goes?"

Some of the girls looked surprised as Quinn stood frozen in place watching the news. She had tried calling Joe three times in a row, her hands shaking badly. Each time it was busy. That's when she stopped, wondering if Joe was hiding somewhere and what if his phone went off revealing where he was to the shooter? She stood in place, helplessly watching when suddenly her phone buzzed. Seeing Joe's name, she almost cried out before quickly answering.

"Joe?! Joe?!"

Joe's voice was hushed and low on the other line.

"Quinn?"

"Joe? What's happening?!"

"I don't know, I'm in my history class, a bunch of us are hiding with Mrs. Eastman. They locked the doors and we're waiting. We heard gunshots."

"Oh my God Joe..."

She saw all of the girls watching her, as tears started rolling down her eyes, holding onto her iPhone so tightly that her hand had started to ache. Joe's name spoke to her, whispered and soft.

"I kept trying my parents but it's busy...listen Quinn I can't talk long, I just wanted to tell you I love you."

Quinn began to cry, shaking her head as tears rolled down her face.

"No! Don't you fucking dare say goodbye to me! You keep hiding Joe...you get out of there once it's safe! Do you hear me?!"

Suddenly she heard the double dial tone, and withdrew her hand seeing that the phone had became disconnected. Horrified, she quickly tried calling him over and over again, before Jessica and the others all surrounded her as Quinn broke down, hysterically crying.

**Later that day...**

Once everything was said and done, the school was dismissed for the remainder of the day. Frightened parents all searched for their children in the rear parking-lot as buses came by the pick up anyone else. Joe had emerged from his class with his teacher and classmates both nervous and on edge. The police had searched the entire school and nothing was found. That meant the person with the gun was out there...

Mr. and Mrs. Hart were waiting and the second they spotted Joe as he nervously walked into the rear lot, his hazel eyes shifting from side to side.

"Jospeh!"

Mrs. Hart cried, before running towards him with her husband. Both of them hugged their only son tightly, muttering prayers of thanks that their son was unharmed. Both had been forced to wait hours until finally the school was properly searched. When they got home, Joe had a headache, and felt dizzy. Mrs. Hart said she would order a pizza, and Mr. Hart was watching the news coverage in the living room, thanking God that nobody had been hurt. Joe grabbed sweats and a T-shirt, telling his mother he needed a cool shower. Heading in, Joe undressed, before standing in the shower, his head hung low as the cool water poured down over his body. Suddenly he remembered he hadn't called Quinn back since his phone died.

Hating himself for forgetting in all the craziness, he knew the moment he got out of the shower the first thing he would do would be to call her. He knew she would be absolutely wild, but all he wanted was to hear his girlfriend's sweet voice. After this awful day this was the one thing he needed to hear the most. Finishing his shower, he dried off, changed into his new clothes, sighing as he stared at his pale reflection in the bathroom mirror. Walking out, heading down the hall to his bedroom to call Quinn, he opened his bedroom door and froze. Quinn stood there in jeans and a pretty mint green blouse. Her face was pale, and her eyes red and puffy from crying. Standing there in his bedroom doorway, his jaw dropped.

"Quinn?"

Quinn raced towards him, wrapping her arms tightly around him. Joe held onto her tight, still stunned that he found her standing in his bedroom. Drawing back, she stared at him, before she roughly kissed him. Taken by surprise, Joe's eyes widened, before she pulled back again, out of breath.

"I took the train here, your parents let me in when you were in the shower...what happened?!"

"I didn't mean to scare you...my phone died...we were all cleared out an hour or so later, they never found the gun that went off."

"I was so scared Joe...I..."

Before she could say another word she hugged him again, so tight Joe felt his breath catch as he held her. Closing his eyes he kissed the top of her head.

"I'm so sorry Quinn...I promise, I'll never scare you again like that again..."

**Later...**

Joe and Quinn laid together on his sofa after his parents went to bed early after they ordered a pizza. Everyone was still shaken up from today's events. Both Mr. and Mrs. Hart were thrilled to Quinn had come, and had made up the guest room for her. Quinn knew she would need to get back to school in another day, but for the time being she just didn't want to let Joe out of her sight. Before they all ate, everyone prayed, thanking God that nothing awful had happened. Quinn watched on the sofa as both of Joe's parents hugged him tightly and kissed him goodnight. Quinn knew she wasn't alone, knowing that if something had happened to Joe, it would very well have driven her insane. Once they were in bed, Joe and Quinn stayed up on the sofa, arms around each other, her head resting on his shoulder as they watched the news reports.

"I was thinking..."

Joe looked down at Quinn.

"I heard Mr. Schuester is still two short for regionals...Sugar asked if I wanted to perform with the New Directions one last time. What do you think?"

Quinn lifted her head and gazed at Joe.

"I think...after everything that's happened...that's the perfect way to say goodbye to Glee Club...if you really are sure you don't want to perform anymore. Whatever you think is right?"

Joe sighed before nodding.

"Yeah, I think Sugar and me are just done, at least for this year...maybe we'll try again when we're seniors. But after today, I don't want to waste anymore time."

Quinn gazed at him.

"You're the kindest, most amazing person I've ever met. Don't you ever scare me like that again? Got it?"

Joe sadly smirked before pressing his forehead against hers.

"Got it."

Mentally Joe thought about his grandmother's ring, and how ever since Quinn and him had gotten back together, he had been planning on taking it and proposing to Quinn at prom.

**Present - 2 months later**

Joe was having a rough morning. He was sitting up, a plastic kidney dish in his hands, vomiting violently up into it. He had lost even more weight, and his hair was thinning even more. Nancy the nurse stood beside him, tucking his hair behind his ears, and gently rubbing his back as he continued gagging. Quinn sat on the edge of his hospital bed on the other side, her hand on his thigh, watching both concerned, as well as helpless as Joe finally spit up, and began heaving for breath.

Nancy took the dish, and then gave him a cup of water.

"Swish around and spit."

Joe nodded, the circles around his eyes a dark shade of purple, his lips tinted lightly blue. Quinn sat there, tears on the edge of her eyes when's suddenly a look came over her face. Joe spit the water into a fresh kidney dish before he raised an eyebrow staring at her.

"You okay?"

Quinn raised an eyebrow.

"Huh?"

Joe weakly motioned to her with his head.

"You look pale...you feeling okay?"

Suddenly an off expression overcame Quinn before her eyes widened and she snatched the plastic kidney dish he had just spit into, and leaned down, strands from her messy ponytail hanging down as she gagged and then spit out a mouthful of vomit. Joe sat back surprised as she gagged. Nancy instantly went over as Quinn threw up another mouthful and used the back of her hand to wipe her mouth.

"God, I don't know what came over me..."

Joe looked concerned as he stared at her as Nancy handed her the cup of water.

"Oh honey, do the same swish and spit."

Quinn nodded with tired thanks in her eyes and did it before Nancy took the dish away.

"Well you know a couple that vomits together, stays together..."

Joe smirked weakly, before he reached out and rubbed Quinn's arm.

"You okay honey?"

Quinn shrugged, looking completely worn out.

"I don't know, last few mornings I've been sick to my stomach, just hope I'm not coming down with anything."

Instantly Joe raised an eyebrow.

"In the mornings huh?"

Quinn was reaching into her purse for a stick of gum to break and split for the two of them. Handing him his piece she shrugged.

"Yeah so?"

Joe smirked before glancing at Nancy who was smiling.

"Honey...are you late?" Quinn took a second, not truly grasping what he meant, before it dawned on her.

"What? Oh...no, I'm..."

She sat there for a second, and began to mentally count in her head. Suddenly, a stunned expression washed over her eyes as Joe smiled.

"Shut up..."

Nancy laughed before Joe looked up at her.

"Nancy, can you get a hold of any...pregnancy tests?"

Quinn rolled her eyes, crossing her arms and shaking her head.

"No way, I would know...besides those tests aren't always positive."

Nancy smiled as she patted Joe's back.

"Honey, the way you've been rushing around, practically living here, worrying about this handsome stud of a husband you have, I know you're stressed...humor us and take a test, after that call you're doctor up and book some labs, if not I can recommend you to Dr. Addison downstairs..."

Quinn suddenly looked very overwhelmed.

"Whoa, no, no, no...I'm not pregnant I know...there's no way."

Joe sat back in his hospital bed, allowing Nancy to fix the oxygen tubes to go up his nose.

"Quinn, you're never this late...besides you've been sick in the mornings. Just humor me and take the test Nancy brings you."

Quinn sighed, before she reached and gently squeezed Joe's hand.

"I don't want you to get your hopes up honey..."

Joe smirked staring at her.

"Take a test...will you?"

Looking up at Nancy's smiling face, Quinn rolled her eyes before she shrugged.

"Okay...fine."

Nancy cheered, before she hurried out of the room, promising she would be right back. Quinn smiled, shaking her head at how silly this whole thing was. Left alone with Joe, she saw how awful he looked. These last two months had been bad for him, and just recently he had begun to have seizures. Looking at him, she tried to control her emotions as she stared at him.

"What are you smiling about?"

Joe smirked before shrugging.

"Just, wondering if you got a bun in the oven...and wondering if I still had it in me."

Quinn smiled, leaning forward gently kissing his chapped lips.

"Oh honey, you've always had it in you."

Joe laughed before he sadly sat back and stared down at her flat stomach. Quinn saw where his gaze was, and suddenly felt terrible. If he had in fact gotten her pregnant, what did this mean? He accomplished what he wanted to do, give her a baby so she had someone after he died. She had been by his side these last two months, and watched as he got weaker and weaker. The reality of him really leaving her soon killed her. She knew she would never be ready. Squeezing his hand, she wished more than anything that this test she was about to take was positive.

She knew he was getting weaker by the day, and the chances of him getting her pregnant again were becoming less and less likely. She knew he wanted to give her a baby so badly. Smiling, she stared at her husband hurried in holding two boxes.

"Ding ding ding!"

Both turned smiling at her.

**Later...**

Quinn stepped out of the bathroom from Joe's hospital room, holding two plastic strips. She knew Joe and Nancy had been waiting on edge ever since she went inside. Walking out, she felt a nervous, yet exciting fluttering in her stomach. She had suspected she might be pregnant actually for the last few days, but had been so caught up with Joe, she had put off actually taking any tests or booking an appointment with Dr. Weathers. Joe actually looked like his old self. His eyes were big and eager, he sat up in his hospital bed smiling with excitement.

"So?"

Quinn smiled before she held up the tests.

"Positive. I'm pregnant."

Nancy let out a loud cheer as Quinn hurried over and carefully put her arms around her frail and thin husband.

Both deeply kissed, when suddnely she felt Joe's body become stiff. Raising an eyebrow, she withdrew, before suddenly his heart monitor began to sound. Joe's eyes rolled back into his head, before his entire body became to convulse. Nancy sprung into action, hitting the alarm bell, lowering his bed, trying to get him to lay down flat.

Quinn jumped back, watching in horror as her husband became to have a seizure just seconds after learning he was going to be a father once again.


	14. Sunset

**Before...**

Quinn wore a beautiful champagne colored gown, her hair pinned up, and freshly bleached to almost the color white. She sat back in heels which were strapped at the ankles. Her arm was linked into Joe's, as both sat on the bleachers of the football field. It was prom night for Joe, now in his senior year. The theme was "The Universe." It didn't hold a candle to Brittany's dinosaur themed prom when she was a senior, but nevertheless the prom committee did a knockout job. Twinkling lights were strung up all over the place, including huge plants hanging made out of paper mâché. Midway throughout the night, Joe asked Quinn if she wanted to get some air? The two walked out of the gym, flushed from dancing all night. Quinn had come down for the weekend, and the entire night had been a blast. Sugar was one of the last original members from The New Directions still in school, and squealed with delight the second she spotted Quinn and Joe. Hugging her tightly, she babbled talking about how much she missed her. Since The New Directions had lost Nationals the year before Sue had shut down Glee. Will was at a new school, and as sad as it seemed...things had truly changed.

Still, Quinn was back with Joe, and ever since the "shooting" happened the year before, she truly saw how much of a mistake it had been breaking up with him. It now seemed as if no other guy could hold a candle to Joe. He always had been there for her when she needed him. Her grades had picked up at, and she was working twice as hard. Joe came to see her twice a month, using his train voucher to see her. One weekend out of the month Quinn would use hers and come back to Lima.

Her mother had sold the house and was now living in a cute little condo across town and was dating this nice lawyer named Gus. Quinn still talked to mostly everyone through text and social media, mostly Rachel, and Mercedes. She had visited them a few times in New York, once even bringing Joe. When she was too busy with finals, she sent flowers to Rachel for her opening night on Broadway. When Rachel tried to re-start the new Directions, Quinn was in town visiting Joe and her mom, and over coffee at The Lima Bean Joe admitted Rachel had tried to get him to re-join but he politely said no. Shrugging, he stared down at his coffee.

"Just isn't the same, and as sorry as I know everyone else...it just got too toxic. Besides I'm graduating in a few months, I wish Rachel and the others the best of luck but any club with Kitty is bad news."

Quinn softly smiled and agreed.

"That's your choice, I respect it, besides...things are changing, just wish we could go back to senior year after we won Nationals. Remember that?"

Joe smirked staring across at her.

"How could I?"

The two had been hopelessly in love, and called every night. Quinn proudly had his photograph framed by her bed in her dorm room, loving the puzzled looks it gt whenever her roommate Jessica stared at it. She turned down countless dates, always smiling and replying...

"Sorry, I got a boyfriend back home."

Tonight had been a blast, the two danced until their feet ached. Joe grabbed them two water bottles as they snuck out and went out to the deserted football field. Faintly they could hear the music blasting from the gym. The two sat on the bleachers, drinking from their water bottles, and leaning against each other.

"God, look at all of those stars..."

Joe said gazing up. Quinn looked up at the black velvet sky as thousands of sparking stars shinned down from above. Smiling, he took her hand, gently squeezing it and helped her up. Quinn had taken off her heels so they wouldn't sink into the soft grass of the field. Walking hand in hand, they ventured to the empty football field and stopped in the center of it. Quinn smiled as Joe took his jacket off and laid it down onto the grass. Carefully, Quinn held onto Quinn's hand as she sat down on top of his jacket.

"Thank you..."

Joe smiled and sat down beside her. Slipping his arm around her, both stared up at the stars and faintly the music from the prom continued to float through the warm May night air. Staring up, Quinn felt completely happy. Here she was attending her boyfriend's senior prom. She was doing wonderful at school, and loved that Joe was actually thinking about going to school to be a teacher himself. They had plans on going to mass this weekend together, and Quinn honestly couldn't wait for next week to finish up her finals. Joe and her had plans to go camping together later this month, and the very idea of three carefree months with her boyfriend sounded like absolute Heaven. Still, she hated to admit that whenever they were making-out, and things were getting hot and heavy, and her hand would lightly brush against the bulge forming in his jeans, a hunger would come over her. A hunger she knew she needed to resist. His faith was very important to him, and she wouldn't do anything to question it. Still, she was insanely attracted to Joe, and more than often she found her hand reaching down her shorts she wore to bed, pleasuring herself thinking of what it would be like to have him inside of her.

Feeling goosebumps break out throughout her arms, she shivered before Joe squeezed her tightly.

"Hey..."

Quinn snapped out of her thoughts, blushing slightly when she glanced over at him and froze.

Joe was holding a small ring box, it was open and inside sat a sparking diamond ring. It was the most gorgeous ring she had ever seen. Instantly her eyes widened in disbelief as she stared.

"What?"

She said in a breathless voice, blinking, not sure she was seeing this right. Joe nervously smiled and let his other arm go from around her as he sat back and held the ring.

"I know this is fast...but if one thing I'm certain about...it's that I'm head over heels in love with you Quinn. I don't ever want to know what life is like without you."

Quinn sat back, her mouth wide open as she stared at both him and the ring completely stunned.

"Joe..."

She said in a breathless voice staring at him. Joe cracked a smile and took a deep breath.

"Quinn Fabray...would you do me the honor in marrying me?"

Quinn slapped both hands over her mouth and choked out a surprised cry as she laughed. Tears filling her eyes, she nodded quickly.

"YES!"

Joe's entire face lit up.

"You will?!"

Quinn laughed and nodded, tears spilling down her face.

"YES! YES!"

Throwing her arms around Joe, she hugged him as tight as she could, burying her face against his dreads as he laughed and pulled back. Gazing into her eyes he smiled.

"You will?"

Quinn nodded, smiling and crying at the same time.

"Yes!"

Joe laughed, before pressing his forehead against hers. Both gazed at each other before Joe fished out the ring and carefully with very shaken hands, slipped it onto Quinn's finger. Thanks to her mom, it fit perfectly. Laughing, both stared down at it, before Quinn smiled from ear to ear, holding it up, gazing at how absolutely gorgeous it was. The ring's stone sparkled against the lights surrounding the field. Sniffling, Quinn stared at it still in disbelief. Looking up at him, she smiled.

Before Joe could say another world, Quinn tilted her head and deeply kissed Joe, her mouth opening and closing as she moaned, draping her arms around him. To her, this was the very beginning...this was it. Joe and her were about to start a new chapter together, side by side and husband and wife. Sadly unknown to both of them, a silent clock had been set, ticking away at their precious time together. They were still three years away from losing their son, and another year after that before Joe got sick. Still, at this exact moment none of this mattered. They were together, alive, in love, and now engaged...

Holding onto her fiancé', she continued kissing him blissfuly unaware of the future.

**Before...**

Stereo Harts was being performed by Sam, Mercedes, and now Arnie. They all were on stage of the Lima Country Club, Sam and Arnie in tuxes, with burgundy colored ties. Mercedes was in a burgundy colored gown. her hair pushed back with a sparking gold headband. The entire country club was decorated beautifully for this time of the year. The centerpieces were dried meadow grass, and fake burgundy and sparking gold flowers. Strung twinkling lights were hung all over, as the three of them sang the very first song that Joe and Quinn performed together.

It was November, and despite the fact both were still in school, they had agreed after becoming engaged a little less than six months before hand, they wanted to get married right away. The news of their engagement spread like wildfire. They first went straight home to tell Joe's parents who were completely over the moon. It seemed that Joe had cashed in a few of his savings accounts a few months before hand, and took a road trip to Columbus to go ring shopping with his dad. They ended up going to Quinn's mother's condo, still in their prom clothes, still buzzed with excitement. At first Quinn's mother raised an eyebrow, before looking straight at Quinn's flat stomach. Laughing, Quinn shook her head.

"Mom, I'm not pregnant."

Caught off guard, Quinn's mother blinked before blushing and laughing.

"Oh! Well of course you aren't. Oh my goodness! That's wonderful!"

She hugged her daughter tight as Joe looked on smiling.

Once Quinn posted about it on social media, her phone started blowing up with texts and calls. Puck was one of the first to respond, and called her the next day. Joe was still asleep since they had spent the entire night before wide awake. Both had celebrated with Joe's parents, and Quinn's mom. All meeting up at a twenty-four hour breakfast joint on the outside of town. After they went home, Joe took Quinn to the lake where both laid on the hood, staring up at the stars. Both started making out, and the entire time as Quinn's entire body started getting turned on, she kept remembering that Joe was going to be her husband, which meant...they could finally have sex. The very idea of this made Quinn crazed as she wrapped her arms around him, gently pulling on his dreads, smiling through the kiss, never truly feeling so happy before in her entire life.

They ended up getting breakfast themselves, taking it to-go, and watched the sun rise at the park. By the time they got home to Joe's, his parents were just leaving for work. They were welcomed with warm hugs, as Joe's mother held back tears. She had a meeting actually with other councilors this morning and was going to be gone most of the day. Hugging Quinn tight, tears of happiness showing in her eyes.

"I always wanted a daughter honey, you have no idea how happy this makes me."

Smiling, Quinn kissed her cheek, before Joe and her changed. Joe got into his boxers, and Quinn changed into shorts, and one of his T-shirts. Both curled up, as Quinn stared at her fiancé' chest, his flat stomach, his tattoos, his slightly muscular arms. Usually Joe wouldn't just sleep in the same bed as her wearing just boxers, but she could tell he just wanted to crash. The instantly his head hit the pillow he was out. Listening to him breathe, Quinn snuggled in closer, gently rubbing his tanned warm arms, listening to him slightly moan in his sleep. Smiling she continued looking him over, still stunned that this man was her fiancé. She honestly didn't think she could love someone this much. Her heart aching, she lifted up her hand and admired her sparking engagement ring. She glanced at him, before nervously biting on her lower lip, wanting more than anything than to reach down through the slit of the opening of his boxers. She sighed, wanting him so badly, but knew if she waited this long, she could wait a little bit longer. Suddenly she understood Rachel and Finn all those years ago when they announced their engagement.

Leaning forward she pressed her forehead against his, and lifted her hand, staring at her ring.

Now all these months later as their friends sang Stereo Hearts, Quinn slowly danced with her husband. The day had been absolutely perfect, her dream wedding in fact. She was dressed in an absolute gorgeous lace white gown. Her mother had taken her to New York to go dress shopping, and Quinn ended up meeting up with Rachel, Santana, Britany, Kurt, and Blaine. The weekend had been a complete blast, and Quinn found her dream gown. Her mother helped her plan everything, and threw her a cute little wedding shower which included some family, the girls from Glee, and her friends from college. Santana who was going to be her maid of honor made an adorable speech remarking that as much as she wanted to gag and roll her eyes hearing about "True love" she was certain after watching Quinn and Joe for years, that this was the real deal. For her bachelorette party, it was just her, two girlfriends from school, Rachel, Mercedes, Tina, Santana, Brittany, and Sugar. They all went to the spa, and treated Quinn to a full day of pampering. Santana smirked when Quinn went in to get fully waxed.

"Man, Jesus is really going to see God when you're through with him.'

Quinn laughed, cheeks burning as she sipped her champagne from the flute. Brittany and Rachel were really curious over the fact that Joe was saving himself for marriage.

"What if he's not any good?"

Brittany asked, not meaning any harm, but asking in a very Brittany straight forward way. Rachel's eyes widened, looking at her friend before Brittany shrugged. Quinn smiled shaking her head as she relaxed as the staff of the spa worked on her nails.

"I think it makes him even more special with him waiting and sticking with his beliefs. Trust me it hasn't always been easy, but I'm fairly certain...he won't disappoint."

The girls all laughed, Mercedes blushing and raising an eyebrow before Sugar grinned, currently getting her toenails painted.

"Have you...you know..."

Quinn smiled, feeling color flicker against her cheeks.

"I have, and it's huge."

All of the girls cracked up as Quinn giggled, loving the attention, and the fact they were talking about her husband to be. For Joe, a couple of his buddies at school, including Blaine, Kurt, Sam, and Arnie were all in town for the wedding had taken Joe out for dinner at breadsticks, then went back to Arnie's, where his mother was out of town for the week. Here they all played X-Box, and used the pool table downstairs. It was mellow, relaxed, and instantly what would make Joe comfortable.

Now here they were, just a few hours after standing before all of their friends and family at their church. Quinn remembered how nervous she felt walking down the aisle, feeling all eyes on her as she slowly clutched her flowers, and heard the beautiful organ music play as she spotted Joe. He looked so handsome, his dreads pulled back, wearing his tux, and his hazel eyes lighting up the second she saw him. Suddenly she didn't feel so nervous. Earlier today as the girls were all getting ready and Quinn wore a silk robe while getting her makeup done, her stomach began to twist and flutter, unable to believe this was really happening. The night before she had a vivid nightmare involving her still being in the wheelchair, and when she woke up gasping for breath, grateful she didn't wake up Brittany and Santana who were camped out on the full sized blow up mattress she had blown up for them in her dark bedroom of her mom's condo. She figured it was just nerves, but she wanted more than ever to just call Joe and hear his voice. Instead, she calmed herself down, laying back trying to focus on the fact that in just a few hours she would be Mrs. Hart.

The day before they had a rehearsal dinner. Mr. Schuester and Emma were there and made a beautiful toast to Joe and Quinn, both sitting side by side at Breadsticks smiling. Mr. Schuester raised his wine glass and smiled at them.

"I've known Joe and Quinn for some time now. Quinn was one of the original members of The New Directions. I've seen her though the good times and the bad, and I'll never forget during her senior year when she had been involved in a very serious accident, she brought in this new kid...he had been home schooled, was a Christian, dreads, and had been nicknamed 'Teen Jesus'..."

This brought on a wave of laughter as Joe grinned and Will smiled as Quinn nuzzled against her fiancé' face.

"I'll never forget her bringing him into booty camp while we were rehearsing for Nationals, and I watched from a far as Joe went with Quinn to physically therapy week after week. Cheering her on, as the two feel in love. I still remember Whitney week, and watching them perform together and thinking to myself 'This is it...this is the real thing.' Glee club became like a second family, and I'm honored to have been able to sit front row to this love story...so raise your glasses everyone and toast to Joe and Quinn...a love story that we all can't wait to continue watching."

Everyone cheered as tears flickered in Quinn's face as she lipped the words..."Thank you." too Will who smiled as Quinn and Joe drank their drinks before turning and kissing each other.

Now the next evening here they were, dancing as man as wife. Quinn kept thinking back to when they said their vows, how overcome with emotion she had been, smiling and crying staring across at him.

"Joe, you were my guardian angel. You were sent to me at my lowest, and you never stopped believing in me. To my best friend, my companion, my soulmate, the love of my life...I promise to stand by your side as you did with me. I love you Joe and I'm honored to spend the rest of my life with you..."

Joe grinned, tears of his own showing.

"When I first started high school, I wasn't like most teenagers. I had been home schooled, shy, weird in a way...and very sheltered. I hadn't ever really hung out with a girl before, so you can't imagine how stunned I was that the most beautiful girl at school was talking to me. I knew I was falling in love the first time I ever heard you sing. It was like an angel. Quinn, I promise to walk through life hand in hand with you. To show God that he brought two soulmates together and we're going to continue to prove that he got this right. I love you Quinn and I can't wait to continue our lives together..."

Quinn at this point was a total wreck. By the time the priest said Joe could kiss the bride, Quinn's knees were shaking as she continued to sob. Now here they were, dancing their first dance together, remembering all those years ago in the courtyard at school, performing to Rachel, and having absolutely no idea that they were destined to be together...

**Before...**

Quinn remembered the night they conceived their son Nash. It was a Thursday night, and it was pouring out. They had moved from Connecticut after Quinn graduated, and had gotten a great job in Ohio. Joe was currently taking classing and interning at the high school. He was hoping to take night classes and get his degree in double the time while logging in hours, and hopefully propose that religion should be a class offered throughout school. He was making decent money, and working so hard, juggling on getting both degrees and certificates. His goal was less than two years if he was able to keep his grades up. The internship was paid, and between what Quinn was making, as well as the money her mother had given them as a wedding present, they had bought this house and figured once Joe started working full time and Quinn worked her way up the ladder they might just flip this house and move into something bigger.

The cape was cute and both had been putting in plenty of hard work to make it their own. Tomorrow Joe had class all day, but didn't have to go in until after nine. Quinn was planning on working from home, as well as go to the hardware store and buy some flowers to plant up front in their yard. They had dinner, and Quinn was currently sitting up in bed, wearing nothing but one of Joe's baggy T-shirts, the late night news on mute as her hair was in a messy ponytail as she scanned over her laptop, double checking emails that needed to be sent. That's when Joe came out of the bathroom. He had been showering, and just a few minutes ago she heard the water stop. One thing Quinn found downright adorable was the fact Joe sung in the shower. Today he had been belting out some Neil Diamond. Quinn had muffled her giggles as she kept shaking her head reading her emails as he kept singing.

The door opened as hot steam drifted out as Joe walked out, wearing nothing but black sweatpants. His breads were tied back and instantly Quinn looked him up and down. The two had been married now going on two years. Ever since their wedding night they had continued to have a very healthy and pleasing sex life. Quinn loved how quickly Joe took to sex. He had been patient enough, and had waited until marriage, now nothing's holding him back. He was no longer embarrassed of his body, and enjoyed exploring it with her. He was curious about how things worked. Some nights after a long day Quinn would give him a blowjob right on the sofa, other times a hand job. Just a few months ago as he was washing the dishes she had snuck behind him before wrapping one arm around his waist, as the other snuck down his jeans. She had even shown him how to go down on her, and the first time he ever did that Quinn nearly drew blood from bitting down on her lip so hard. This was something Joe was amazing at, and each time he would lift his flushed face, grinning, asking if she wanted to keep going? As always Quinn would roll her eyes back and push his head down telling him to keep going.

They had tried anal once, but Joe had chickened out. Still, the different positions were what made it so interesting. Both had sex roughly four times a week, and she figured as long as both were young and healthy what was stopping them?

She knew he loved whenever she got on top. He had taken her from behind a few times, doggy style, always concerned, asking if he was hurting her? But she knew her being on top was his absolute favorite. Whenever they did this, she would easily lifting her body up from his erect shaft, before easing herself down. As always he would stare up transfixed, his large hands firmly grasping her sides.

When she saw him walk out of the bathroom, his body still slightly slick with water, she smiled and shut her laptop.

"Hey mister..."

Joe smiled as he circled around. Instantly Quinn soaked in the view of his body, and decided to say screw it. She was horny, and wanted the weight of him on top of her, as well as the pressure of him inside of her. Smiling, Quinn carefully placed her laptop down, before she dramatically yawned, and pulled his shirt off her body, flinging it to the side, she stretched, feeling her neck crack before she smiled totally relaxed before stretching out again like a cat in the center of her bed, opening her legs wide.

Joe turned, having pulled a T-shirt from his dresser when he froze. Seeing his wife completely naked, his jaw dropped, before he nervously smiled and raised an eyebrow.

"Well, well, well...I take it you don't want to watch that re-run of American Idol?"

Quinn giggled before she motioned to him with her finger.

"Kick those pants off Mr. Hart, I'm horny."

Laughing, blushing slightly, Joe nodded.

"Okay, if you say so ma'am."

"Oh I insist.."

Laughing, Joe pulled down his sweatpants, wearing nothing else underneath. Instantly his penis sprang up from the bush of public hair, and nearly stood all the way up to his bellybutton. Staring at it. Quinn smiled. Over the course of the last two years Quinn had seen her husband's penis so much, she had joked the she could probably paint it from memory. She remarked that it was her favorite part of him, and had seen it up close, in her hands, as well as her mouth millions of times. She even knew about the birthmark right down below in his groin area that she only knew about. Smiling, she reached onto her nightstand and took out her cheery flavored lipgloss. She knew this stuff drove Joe smiled. Applying it on, she smacked her lips, before turning towards her husband who crawled onto bed, his penis twitching as that glazed over turned on expression flickered in his eyes. Opening her legs, she took hold of him and started kissing him like a madwoman, the taste of cheery lip gloss was strong as he hovered above her, before swiftly entering her, causing her entire body too stiffen. Driving himself in, she cried out and grasped onto his shoulder blades.

**Later...**

"Don't stop Joe, don't stop...oh GOD DON'T STOP!"

She cried, tossing her head from side to side, her hands firmly grasping Joe's arching shoulder blades. They had been at it for the last fifteen or so minutes, and she knew Joe was in the final home stretch. He was thrusting at a quickened pace, the headboard loudly creaking as he laid between her two spread legs, his ass pumping up and down as he drove his hips into her over and over and over again.

Suddenly as sweat dripped off him, he loudly cried out, his ass tensing one last time as he moaned as climaxed roughly inside of her. Snapping his eyes shut, one hand was covering her left breast, the other was pinning down her other hand above her head, tangled in her blond messy undid hair. Feeling him climax inside of her, Quinn stiffened herself, having just come down from her second orgasm. Feeling his spunk drip down inside of her. Quinn let out a deep breath, before Joe lifted his face, flushed and exhausted.

"You okay?"

She loved how that was always his first question. Smiling, she leaned up and kissed him.

"Perfect, how about you?"

Joe smiled and looked down at himself, still very much inside of her.

"I think I might need another shower..."

"How about I join you?"

Grinning, Joe leaned down and deeply kissed her. Both having no idea that they had just conceived their firstborn child. A little boy named Nash, who would die inside Quinn's womb before he even got a chance to take his first breath...

**Present...**

"Joe?"

Joe's long eyelashes fluttered open as he stared weakly up at her. The sound of machines clicking and beeping filled the room, an oxygen tube going down his throat. Taking a second, confused, he blinked, before he gagged on the tube. Nancy the nurse shook her head, and brushed back his sweaty thinning hair.

"Lay stiff, we had to put a tube in to help you breathe, we'll talk it out tomorrow, but until them relax and let it do the breathing for you..."

Joe settled down, too weak to really fight. Laying there, a million tubes and wires going into him, he saw Quinn's beautiful face. She looked so worried, and her eyes were red from crying. Weakly she laid there, before Quinn squeezed his hand.

"The doctor will be in later, if your levels continue going up they can take the tube out...just let it breathe for you honey, just relax."

Joe blinked and stared at her. Sighing, she continued to stroke his hand.

"You had a bad seizure, you almost flatlined but you're okay...do you remember much?"

Joe took a second before his hand weakly lifted and touched Quinn's flat stomach. Smiling, a single tear rolled down her face.

"Yeah, that's right. I got bloodwork while you were asleep...it's confirmed, I'm pregnant."

Joe's eyes widened as he continued staring at her flat stomach.

"They said I could be at high risk so I need to rest...God Joe...you did it! You're gonna be a daddy..."

Joe's eyes looked sad as he lifted them and stared straight at Quinn.

"You don't worry about a thing, just rest and relax and we'll talk tomorrow...just try and get some sleep, I'll be here the whole time I promise."

Unable to say anything, Joe's hand slowly reached across and placed itself on her flat stomach. Sniffling, Quinn smiled, covering his hand with hers as both sat in silence, very much knowing that as happy as this news was...Joe very well might not be able to hang on long enough to see their baby be born. Instead of saying anything else, Quinn continued holding his hand, resting against her flat stomach, where deep inside their child safely grew, not knowing that it's father was hanging on sadly on borrowed time...

**Two weeks later...**

Quinn laid in bed holding the printed out ultrasound photo that Dr. Weathers had given her. She pointed out the two tiny little white dots to Joe who's breathing was labored.

"See there and there?"

"Yeah?"

"Two heartbeats."

Joe took a second before he turned and stared at her, suddenly his eyes wide in disbelief.

"What?!"

Quinn smiled.

"Twins."

"Oh my God..."

"My cousins and aunts are identical, and there's a high chance they might be. Congrats daddy."

She nuzzled his neck as Joe stared in complete and utter amazement at the photo.

**Later...**

Nancy sniffled stopping filming on Joe's phone. The last few days Quinn had been insisting on staying with Joe over night, always snuggled up close to him, almost afraid to leave even for an hour. Finally after much convincing, Joe got Sam to take Quinn out for dinner, and a night to sleep in her own bed. She had another appointment with Dr. Weathers tomorrow, and ever since she found out she was carrying twins, it seemed as if she was filled with a new hope. She didn't seem to want to talk, nor think about the fact that Joe had weeks really left as he grew more and more frail. His parents had visited earlier today. They had gone to the family lawyer and drew up some paperwork. He was going to make sure Quinn, as well as the babies were taken care of no matter what. His parents had been amazing throughout this whole thing, but he knew how devastated they were, mostly his mother. She held back tears, as he had the "talk" with him, knowing very well time was running out. He felt better knowing they would be here for her and the babies.

"What if something happens honey? Or she loses them?"

"Then, she'll need even more support. Look after her mom, she's the love of my life."

Crying, Mrs. Hart kissed the top of her son's head and promised.

Now he had finished his "goodbye" video to Quinn, something in which Nancy would save and send through his email to her after it finally happened, mostly likely maybe after his funeral. It seemed so surreal. He was going to be a father again, and a father to twins. He wanted nothing more than to be there when they were born, hold them, kiss their heads, watch them take their first steps, or say their first words...

Instead, he was dying, leaving his beautiful wife and children alone.

He would be damned if she stayed alone because of this. He used the last of his strength, and Nancy agreed to film it. Once it was saved, he sniffled and thanked Nancy who was crying herself.

"Thank you Nancy..."

"Of course honey...how is Quinn holding up?"

"She's had pretty bad morning sickness but the doctor said that's good with her hormones. I'm just so scared she's at high risk...with all of this stress. I messaged a lot of our old friends from high school, and my parents...I'm worried but I know she won't be alone."

Nancy sadly nodded when Joe weakly stared out the window, his breathing labored and slow.

"I was thinking years ago...at Glee club where we met in high school. We did a disco week, and this girl Santana sung the song 'If I can't have you.'"

Nancy smiled.

"I love that song..."

Joe warmly smiled.

"I remember we had just met a few months before hand, but sitting there watching Santana sing, I glanced over at Quinn looking so beautiful, singing along and I knew right then and there I wanted her to be my girlfriend...that I might very well have fallen in love with her sitting there. Little did I know, I would have been lucky enough to marry her, and have children...I might have been unlucky health wise, but I gotta tell you Nancy...having Quinn as my wife, I think I've been the luckiest man ever, and I mean it."

Smiling, Nancy nodded as Joe continued staring out the window as the sun began to set, making the sky a stunning gold and purple color. Nancy walked over, ready to close to blinds, when Joe shook his head.

"Leave it open please...I want to watch the sunset, it's beauitfuil tonight."

Smiling, Nancy saw Joe's pale face, knowing very well what was going to happen very soon. Nodding, she turned and looked at the setting sun.

"It sure is honey...it sure is."

The next evening it finally happened. Joe's heart stopped.


	15. The 100th

**Before...**

_Quinn was four months pregnant with Nash. It was a Saturday afternoon, and less than three hours ago Quinn and Joe had woke up from taking a nap after visiting the market. Quinn found this pregnancy completely different than her pregnancy with Beth. This one left her exhausted. Durning the workweek, she found herself constantly yawning around noon. She had cut out all coffee since she found out she was pregnant, and noticed how tried she got always around the same time of day. Dr. Weathers reassured her that it was perfectly normal. Most nights after dinner while Joe cleaned up and washed the dishes, Quinn would curl up on the sofa and fall asleep. Usually Joe would join her, opening his laptop to catch up one homework, all the while gently rubbing her legs. On the weekends, after they finished running their errands, Quinn would usually head upstairs for an hour nap. Today Joe had joined her. They slept back to back, and Quinn felt the comfort of the pressure of his warm back against hers relaxing, sleeping the best she had in days. When they woke up, Joe turned over, dreads falling over as he smiled. Suddenly, that same feeling of being extremely turned on overcame her. In the last month Quinn found herself constantly feeling horny. _

_When she casually brought this up to Dr. Weathers, she chuckled, and said it was perfectly normal, her hormones were simply just kicking in. Joe welcomed this, and took advantage that his wife couldn't keep her hands off him. Instantly, Quinn's breasts started to heave, as her hands reached down and began to rub against the crotch of his sweatpants. Laughing, Joe leaned against her, before he deeply kissed her. Feeling his erection start to pulse beneath her hand, still rubbing the bulge, making him begin to kiss her even harder, their mouths opening and closing. Pulling back slightly, Joe smiled as Quinn stared up breathless. Slowly he leaned down, lifting her T-shirt slightly and touching her stomach. She was nearing the end of her forth month, and she was just beginning to really show. She had been enjoying this pregnancy so far, besides a little morning sickness, she felt actually the best she had in forever. Everyone agreed, she actually did fit that stereotype for pregnancy. She truly was glowing. She skin as clear, her eyes bright, and Joe kept remaking she had never looked more beautiful. She had just recently called Shelby and Beth, seeing if Beth received her birthday present. Shelby was thrilled over the news of the pregnancy, and after Quinn spoke to Beth who sounded downright adorable, babbling on about her class, friends, and newest teacher. when Quinn told her that Joe and her were having a baby, Beth squealed with happiness, thrilled she was going to be a big sister. _

_Joe had gently pressed his hand against her stomach, before he slowly worked his way down, and put his ear to her stomach. So often Joe did this, usually before bed. Just last night he had been humming and singing to her belly. Quinn as always would stroke his dreads, smiling as she listened to him sing to their baby. Joe had just recently downloaded an app on their phone that monitored the baby's growth and development. As of right now it said their baby was a little bigger than an avocado. This had cracked up Joe to no end, and he had made it a tradition to sing to her belly every night, wanting the first sounds it heard it the womb to be music, since that's what brought them together. Slowly, Joe kissed her stomach, his soft lips opening and closing against her skin, before he slowly started down towards the waistband of her shorts. He gently began to push them down from her hips. _

_He continued kissing further, and further down, before Quinn gasped, tilting her head back as Joe went down on her, using that tongue of his that drove her absolutely wild. Now in those three hours, they had made love a total of five times. Somehow Joe had enough energy to actually surprise Quinn into almost pure exhaustion. Every time both climaxed together, shuddering in a joined orgasm, slick with sweat, chests heaving. They had twisted together beneath the sheets, tangled in them. Quinn laid beneath her husband, his dreads hanging down around her, as she laughed. Her legs wrapped around his ass, as he kissed her throat, and pressed his forehead against hers. That's when they felt it, both of them at the same time. It was faint, and unlike how it felt when she first felt Beth kick. It was strange, like a small fluttering, but nevertheless, she felt it, and so didn't Joe, still very much inside of her, his flat stomach against hers that had begun too take shape. Instantly his eyes widened, giving the same stunned expression he had given her dozens of times. His mouth opening in surprise._

_His eyebrows raised, his eyes lit up. He gave the same expression when she had started to walk again in physical therapy. The same look he gave her when she wanted to start dating him, when they won nationals, saw each other naked, when he proposed, when they first made love, and when he first found out she was pregnant. Here he stared down at her, totally amazed. He looked down, before he lifted his eyes and stared at her. _

_"Was that?"_

_Quinn smiled, her hand going down between their bodies feeling her stomach. The same familiar stirring came again, and both knew for sure, this was their baby moving. Laughing, Joe stared at her, before she leaned forward, firmly grasping the sides of his face, deeply kissing him. Their mouths opened and closed, before she could feel him beginning to get hard again inside of her. Moaning, she franticly kissed him, before he began to move inside of her. In no time he was breathing deeply, thrusting away, pumping inside of her as she held onto his arching shoulder blades, begging him not to stop as another orgasm crashed over her. Breathing deeply, she clung onto him and pressed her forehead against his, never feeling more happy than she did at this exact moment. Both were in love, happily married, with their son safe and alive in her womb. Both months away from the heartbreaking reality of their son being stillborn, and then a year or so after that...Joe getting sick. At this exact moment, both were young and in love, and nothing could hurt them... _

Quinn was jolted awake by the sound of her cellphone ringing. Taking a second, she desperately clung onto this wonderful dream, wanting so badly to stay in it. Instead, the image of Joe making love to her flickered and faded away, and finally Quinn found herself wide awake. She was laying in the very same bed she had been dreaming of making love to her husband in. Now she was alone, laying in the dark, her husband in the hospital, and now growing in her stomach were two twin boys... She took a second, eyes adjusting to the dark, her hand slipped across her stomach before she reached and answered. Sighing, now awake, she blinked. "Hello?" She heard crying, and instantly her stomach dropped.

"Quinn?"

She knew it was Nancy. She was crying. Instantly, her eyes widened as she gripped the cellphone right enough that her knuckles were white. Sitting up straight, she listened to the sniffling on the other line.

"Nancy?"

"Honey, you're friend Sam is coming over right now, I didn't want you driving..."

Quinn gulped, suddenly her heart was hammering deeply in her chest.

"Is he dead?"

Nancy sniffled again.

"Quinn..."

"He's gone isn't he?"

There was a silence on the other line before finally Nancy sighed.

"He stopped breathing about forty minutes ago. The doctors worked on him for nearly a half an hour. They just called it. They couldn't get his heart started honey. They tried, please believe me. I was there the entire time...I wanted you to come down here before they took him downstairs. I'm sorry honey..."

Quinn blinked, she figured she was what shock felt like. She had been trying to accept that this day would come sooner than later. Still, she had just been there. It was Joe who insisted she go home and sleep in a regular bed since her back had been hurting. She wondered if maybe, by some crazy way she could have stopped this from happening if she had been there? She sat there, remembering just hours ago, sitting in his hospital bed with him. He had a feeding tube going into his stomach now, and could barley lift his head. He sat slightly up, high and dazed on meds. His eyes glazed over slightly as the machines continued to beep and click.

He had his oxygen tubes going up his nose, and the entire time Quinn laid in bed with him, gently rubbing ice cubes across his chapped lips, and stroking his thin wavy hair. His hands were placed on her stomach, his eyes never leaving it. Quinn had started talking about her ideas for the nursery. She had even brought a small smile to his face when she joked about two cribs. She had hummed to him, and laid there, hoping she was taking his mind off the pain. She said tomorrow she would bring in some magazines and they could pick a theme. Sam said he would take her to the hardware store to pick out paint. About a half an hour later, Joe insisted she go home and get some rest.

"You get some rest, remember...those are my babies in there."

He said in a horsed cracked sounding voice. Laughing, Quinn nodded.

"Okay, fine." Rolling her eyes, she got up, stretching, before making sure he was comfortable, before Joe weakly motioned to the closet with his head.

"I have a surprise for the babies...Nancy helped me finish it. This was before we found out we were having twins...so they are just gonna have to learn how to share."

Quinn lifted an eyebrow smiling, before turning and walking to the closet. Opening, she reached into a large shopping bag, and pulling out the knitted blanket. Holding it, she couldn't believe how big it was. Holding it out, she gasped, looking at how absolutely amazing it came out.

"When did you guys work on this?!"

Joe weakly smiled, his eyes half closed.

"Here and there...you like it?"

Quinn smiled and brought it up to her face. Instantly she smiled warmly.

"It smells like you...I love it. I'm sure they will be sharing a crib for the first few months...once they are ready to go to college they can fight over who gets too keep it."

Joe weakly laughed before Quinn walked over, holding it draped over her arm.

"I love it, really...it's beautiful."

Joe smiled before he very slowly reached out and swept his hand across her stomach, covered by her blouse. Smiling, Quinn leaned down and gently kissed his pale cheek.

"I'll see you in the morning, you need anything you have Nancy call me okay?"

Joe looked as if the pain meds were really starting to kick in. He gave a tired smile and nodded. Holding onto the blanket, she stared down at her husband. It had been such a bad week for him. He had been vomiting blood lately, and really struggling to breathe. The only time he sorta seemed like his old self was when she talked about the babies. Her last appointment had gone really well, but Dr. Weathers stated her concerns over the stress of what was happening could put her at high risk, especially now that she was carrying twins. The babies were developing nicely, but Quinn's blood pressure was dipping up and down. Dr. Weathers had become close with Quinn ever since she lost Nash. She gave Quinn her personal number and explained to reach out even if she just wanted to talk. She lost her husband in a car accident nearly eleven years ago. Quinn had absolutely no idea. She then explained she was pregnant for the first time, only two months along but she miscarried shortly after the funeral. She figured it was just too much between the shock of what happened, and the stress. She later remarried, and has a little girl. She motioned to the framed photograph of an adorable little girl with black curls, picking flowers and laughing at the camera. She said that she honestly never thought she would get over losing her husband and the baby, but eventually she was able to move on, because she knew that's what her husband would have wanted. Quinn suddenly became uncomfortable, she tried to make an excuse that she needed to get back to the hospital, but she wouldn't let up.

"Quinn, have you thought of talking to a therapist or councilor?"

"I'm fine, I have my mom, and joe's parents, and my friends..."

"That's wonderful, and I'm glad you have a great foundation of people who you can talk to and lean on, but...the reality is, you're pregnant...pregnant with twins. This is after your last pregnancy resulted in you losing your son. After what what was it? A few months later Joe got diagnosed, and since then you've been worrying about him nonstop. Hospital visits, and specialist, treatments, chemo, it's been a lot. you're been living in hospitals, watching your husband, who's still so young get weaker and weaker. Now...you two have hit the end of the road. I know how horrible this much be. Joe is your whole world...he's amazing. I've met a lot of boyfriends, and husbands and he takes the cake. I watched him stand by your side throughout it all, and now you've done the same for him. It's hard to accept that he's fought so hard and now...you're pregnant again with twins. Nobody should ever go through what you have gone through, and I know you keep saying you're fine, but eventually there's going to be the day you get that call...and you'll have to face the reality of grieving your husband, and facing a future without him while raising two children alone."

Quinn sat back, tears filling her eyes as she stared down at her hands and her wedding ring. She usually freaked out whenever it was brought up that Joe was dying, and didn't have long now. No, this wasn't how it was supposed to happen. She was finally pregnant again, with twins! They had so much to look forward together. She couldn't wait to have Joe with her in the delivery room, both squirming screaming babies, flushed, and very much alive. She knew how badly Joe wanted to be a father, and there was so much to look forward to raising these babies with him. The sad fact was time was running out. Joe's doctors had sat her down, and said at this point it was just a matter of time.

They wanted to make him comfortable, and said at best he had less than a month. The very idea that Joe wouldn't live to see his children be born broke her heart. She wanted him to fight, to somehow beat this sickness that was eating him up. She prayed so badly for a miracle, for anything to happen so her husband would live and not leave her. Joe's parents weren't taking this well, especially Joe's mother. She had been over the moon about the babies, but had visited Joe in the hospital. He had just ad a seizure, and was laying in his hospital bed, an oxygen mask placed over his nose and mouth, slightly fogging up with each breath. Quinn came in after talking to the doctors, and found Mrs. Hart laying in bed with Joe, staring down at him, her eyes heartbroken. Quinn felt her chest ache as she walked in, before sitting on the edge of the bed. Joe continued to sleep, before Quinn sighed and rubbed his leg over the blankets.

"This was a bad one, doctors want him closely monitored for the rest of the night."

Ms. Hart sadly nodded, still staring down at him.

"I miss his hair so much, it was so thick and beautiful. He had mentioned he wanted to get rid of his dreads after the wedding. He said he wanted to grow it out. He always had the most beautiful thick hair. I bet the babies will get that from him."

Quinn sadly nodded.

"Yeah I hope so..."

"It's almost at the end now, I can feel it. His body is so weak...I just can't believe this is my baby boy."

She struggled with tears, before she sniffled and stared at her.

"Quinn honey, you have made our son so happy. I'll never forget when he came home from school. So excited about this cute girl he met at school..."

Quinn smiled as Ms. Hart went on, stroking his pale face.

"Me and my husband...we wanted him so badly. It took years to get pregnant. We miscarried a few times, and we were beginning to give up hope...then out of nowhere I got pregnant with Joe. I almost lost him a few times, and finally when he was born, it was like God had sent me my own little angel. He was so perfect. I think that's a big reason why I had him homeschooled. I didn't want to let go of my little angel and have him grow up. I swear Quinn, it was like he was suddenly brought to life. He was so excited the day you brought him to join Glee club. You've made him so happy...I promise you, these babies will know how badly their father wanted them. We'll make sure of that okay?"

Quinn felt her chest ache as she blinked away tears and nodded.

"Okay..."

Sadly smiling, Ms. Hart continued to softly brush back Joe's hair, humming softly as she did so.

**Before...**

Quinn was in her wheelchair, struggling to put her books away in her locker, reaching up when suddenly a few came crashing down. Joe, the new kid aka "Teen Jesus" was kneeling right beside her, putting his books away as well. Joe picked up her books, putting them away.

"Maybe you should request a lower locker. Could be...easier."

Quinn shook her head.

"No, this has always been my locker and will continue to be my locker until I walk across the stage in my cap and down and get my diploma."

Quinn sighed as Joe shut the locker door, not even taking a second look at her photos. One of which was right after Beth was born, the only of Beth just a few years old. Shutting the locker door he stared down at her, fixing the strap of his massager bag. Looking at him, his dreads, his wooden beaded necklace, his nose ring and tattoos...she suddenly thought he was pretty cute. A far cry from the kind of guys she usually liked, but he really was cute, especially his eyes.

"I gotta get to class..."

She muttered, feeling that strange fluttering in her stomach as the tension grew. Staring down at her, he smirked.

"Can I walk with you?"

Quinn blinked, a little taken aback before she nodded. Joe asked where she was headed, she told him history class, room 403. He walked behind her, and began pushing down the crowded hallways. At first Quinn wanted to insist she was fine and could wheel herself. She was still upset after she talked with Arnie at the skatepark on what should have been a carefree senior skip day. She knew he meant well, but it almost seemed as if he wanted her to stay in the chair so he wouldn't be alone. Trying to calm down, not letting her emotions get the best of her, she sat back as Joe wheeled her.

"I've been praying for you."

Quinn actually felt touched.

"I guess it couldn't hurt for God to hear from a couple of people..."

They approached her class.

"Praying to walk again as well..."

"I didn't pray for you to walk. I prayed for God to help you with whatever your dreams may be."

Quinn held onto the wheels, causing the chair to halt to a stop. She took a deep breath, everything about today as starting to truly build up.

"I appreciate your prayers...but when your done praying you're able to get off your knees and walk away..."

The second she said it, she knew how that sounded. Joe walked around to face her, truly looking not bothered. Suddenly Quinn felt embarrassed. She took a deep breath and wheeled a little away before stopping, hating herself. Before she was Ms. Popular, everyone liked and loved her. Now it was just like with Beth again. She saw who truly cared and who didn't. People couldn't even look at her. She sighed.

"Sorry...self obsessed bitch."

Joe lightly chuckled walking towards her. He went to continue pushing her again, clearly not bothered.

"It's cool."

Quinn smiled and turned facing him as he raised an eyebrow.

"You know what? You're really inspiring, and I have a feeling you could inspire a few other people I know. What are you doing after school?"

Joe smiled.

"Nothing."

"How would you feel about joining glee club. You can play guitar, can sing better than most people I know. Can you dance?"

Joe blushed a little and did the so-so sign with his hand. Laughing, Quinn stared up at him.

"That's better than most. So how about it. We're trying to get ready for nationals in a few months. Our teacher is really cool, and it might be a fun way to learn recent music...as long as you're allowed?"

Joe smiled and nodded.

"My mom has actually been wanting me to join some clubs and get to make more friends. You sure it will be okay?"

Quinn nodded smiling.

"Absolutely. Meet me outside class after school, deal?"

Joe smiled.

"Deal."

**Later...**

Joe met Quinn as promised as he pushed her to the auditorium where everyone was warming up for "booty camp". Quinn really didn't have to go since she had every plan on being out of this chair by the time they went to nationals. Still, she attended every practice knowing walking or not walking, her dance skills could improve by a long shot. Joe had pushed her in and they met with Mr. Schuester. Smiling, Quinn asked if she could have the floor and announce something? Mr. Schuester said of course, and Coach Sylvester was standing near by as everyone was warming up on stage. Quinn smiled.

"I invited a friend, you remember him from Valentine's Day?"

Brittany smiled and cupped her hands saying...

"Teen Jesus!"

Joe lit up and waved as Quinn continued talking...

"He's got a killer voice."

Everyone cheered as Mr. Schuester welcomed him to The New Directions. Joe joined them as Puck motioned.

"Dude you got a twig in your hair..."

Joe made a face, when Puck shook his head.

"No dude, seriously..."

Joe picked it out before smiling.

"Thanks..."

Practice went great. Quinn sat back and watched him and was surprised at how quickly he picked up on the dance moves. Everyone seemed to really like him, and once everything was said and done, Joe wiped his forehead and joined her as everyone got ready to leave.

"That was amazing, thank you so much for inviting me."

Quinn smiled and offered him her water bottle. He smirked and took a gulp of it before handing it back.

"Thanks..."

"No problem, I think we're going to need you. So practice is three times a week after school, and Glee Club is every day during forth period, and on Fridays first. That cool?"

"Totally, I had a second study period and when I called my mom she was thrilled. You need a ride."

"Thanks but my mom is picking me up."

"Let me push you out then."

Quinn smiled staring up at him as he grabbed his bag. Together he walked out pushing her as Brittany and Santana grabbed their things watching them. Brittany smiled.

"The new girl is cute huh?"

Santana smirked before she motioned to Quinn and Joe leaving together.

"Looks like Quinn might have a little crush. Nice."

**Present **

Sam hurried over as soon as the hospital called. He raced over, using the spare key Quinn and Joe had given to him, and could hear the screams as he hurried up the driveway. He found Quinn completely hysterical, sobbing her eyes out, shaking in her bedroom. She had trashed the room, two lamps were laying on the carpet shattered. She was frantic, pacing back and forth, pulling at her hair, sobbing when Sam came in. She tried to fight him, pushing him away and screaming...

"NO! HE CAN'T BE DEAD! HE CAN'T! I WANT HIM BACK. OH GOD WHY SAM? WHY IS HE GONE, HE CAN'T BE...I WANT MY HUSBAND! PLEASE LET ME HAVE HIM BACK PLEASE!"

The rest didn't make sense, until finally she calmed down enough. Sam at first thought maybe he outta call her mother, but she began getting worked up again, telling him as tears poured down her face that she wanted to go to the hospital. He brought her as she changed into jeans, and wore her Yale sweatshirt, her hair drawn back in a messy ponytail, her face puffy, her eyes bloodshot. They drove in silence as Sam kept nervously glancing over. He cared about Quinn, and even had a history with her. He had grown close with both her and Joe, and counted Joe as one of his closest friends. It honestly just seemed like yesterday that Joe was asking for advice in the locker room about the woman who would go on to become his wife. He remembered watching from afar as Joe joined the Glee Club on top of The God Squad, and honestly seemed as if he was falling deeper and deeper in love every single time he gazed at Quinn from across the room.

He remembered their wedding, and the countless nights of him being invited over for dinner, the three of them all laughing sitting around the kitchen, long before Joe got sick. He knew this day was coming, but hated the fact that Quinn was pregnant, no...pregnant with twins, and now suddenly all alone. It seemed crazy to believe that Joe was actually gone. In fact, he had gone to see him two days ago and had a feeling this would be the last time he ever saw him. Now here he was, late at night driving his pregnant wife to go see his dead body. It seemed so unreal. More than anything he wished Mercedes was here. Glancing over, he saw Quinn staring out the window, her eyes blank, most likely in shock.

One hand rested on her tiny little bump of her pregnant stomach, the other absently playing with her wedding band.

**Later...**

Sam knew he had phone calls to make. He stood there absolutely heartbroken. The doctor had greeted Quinn, along with Joe's nurse Nancy. Sam could tell Nancy had been crying, as the doctor sadly sighed staring at Quinn as she walked over to the nurse's station, her eyes glassy with tears.

"I'm so sorry Quinn. We tried everything we could, we just couldn't get his heart started again. Dr. Green came down to assist. He flatlined and we tried putting a tube and line in, we even used the defibrillator on him several times and injected him with adrenaline. I'm so sorry honey, we knew this day was coming. Even if he had hung on for maybe another week, he most likely would have slipped into a coma with his oxygen levels. At this point we were just managing his pain."

"How long...did you work on him?"

Quinn said, her eyes defeated and dead looking. Sam dropped his eyes as Dr. Swayer sighed.

"Half an hour to maybe forty five minutes. We finally called it knowing even if we got a heartbeat, he would have been braindead at that point. He died while sleeping Quinn. I know you don't want to think about it, but he went peacefully. We tried everything we could...but like I said his body was just too weak. We need to move him soon, but I wanted you to be alone for a little bit and say goodbye. We'll be helping your friend make calls and contact his parents."

Quinn didn't say a word before Nancy took her hand, and led him to his room. Sam followed before stopping, knowing Quinn needed to be alone. Dr. Swayer had Joe's phone, asking if he could help him make some phone calls. Watching Quinn and Nancy enter the room, closing the door behind them. Sighing, he nodded and took Joe's phone. When he opened it, he saw the background was of Quinn, wearing a large sunhat smiling. Staring at it, he blinked tears away. Inside Joe's room, all of the machines were shut off and silent. Nancy squeezed Quinn's hand.

"I'm so sorry baby, I was sitting right beside him while he slept. I was reading to him just how he liked it. Right after you left, I had to give him another shot. He was in so much pain, and he told me...that he hoped the babies looked just like you, even if they were boys...he said he hoped they looked just like you. That was the last thing he ever said...he fell asleep after the shot and then about twenty minutes later the monitors went off when he flatlined. I called in a code blue, tried giving me CPR while the doctor came in with the other nurses. Honey they tried everything they could...I think he wanted to hold on as long as he could, but his poor body wouldn't allow it. Take your time and say goodbye to him, okay?"

She squeezed her hand, kissing her cheek before walking her over to the bed. They had cleaned him up for Quinn's sake, taking the tubes out, putting his shirt down, and folding his hands. His eyes were closed, his face pale, and his lips slightly parted and gray. Standing there, suddenly Quinn didn't think she could do this. Her heart hammered in her chest as she stared down, swaying. She clutched onto Nancy's hand tightly, staring down at her husband who looked as if he was just sleeping.

"He looks peaceful..."

Nancy said, sniffling. Staring down, feeling absolutely nothing. Nancy told her she would give her some privacy, and left her. Once she heard the door shut, Quinn felt a terrible ache in her chest. She knew she could carry on, screaming and shaking her husband's body, screaming at him to get up and open his damn eyes and stop scaring her. She knew she could try and give him CPR against his cold lips, and pray that somehow they had been wrong. Suddenly it all seemed as if there hadn't been enough time. He was just in his early twenties. He was a good man who worked hard, loved her, and believed in God. Why? Why did this happen? She remembered him wrapping his arms around her when they learned Nash was dead.

Now she was all alone... She stared down at him. Why couldn't they be back home? Safe and warm in bed. Pregnant with twins, her husband's arms draped over her, feeling her stomach. She now stood, staring down at her husband...the same guy she laid eyes on during the first god Squad meeting and somehow in the back of her mind she knew...she was going to fall in love with him. Silently, she crawled in bed for the last time with her husband. She snuggled in close, nuzzling his cold face before feeling her chest heave as tears began to spill down her face. Snapping her eyes shut, her face crumpling, she felt everything ache inside of her as she sighed, smelling his skin, and knowing this was it. Her husband was dead, it was now officially all over. Everything inside of her hurt, as she reached over, holding his cold body against hers.

She knew this wasn't Joe anymore... Sobbing, she snapped her eyes shut, pressing her forehead against the side of his head for the very last time. That's when she broke down completely. Sobbing, she held onto her husband, wanting more than ever for him to open his eyes and just look at her. Crying, she cried for the fact...this had been it. Her love story cut short, but she mostly cried for the fact that this was it. It was final, and here she was, finally reaching the end. She knew he wanted so badly to stay, but now it was over. Feeling her body ache as she moaned, crying against him, she clutched onto his cold body, and knew now...she was allowed to be sad. She was allowed to mourn her husband, and feel devastated. She knew she would be for awhile...

Then...

She knew she had to keep going...for them. Joe's children. Crying, she laid there, sobbing and crying as Sam opened the door and looked in. Tears filled his own eyes as he sighed watching them. Feeling completely helpless, he bowed his head as Quinn buried her face against Joe's, and cried the most helpless, gut wrenching, devastated sound he had ever heard.

This was the night Joe Hart had died.

**Two days later...**

Ms. Hart was downstairs with her husband. They were taking their son's death as good as to be expected. They both came to the hospital shortly before Joe was taken downstairs to the morgue. When they arrived, Ms. Hart breathed deeply before walking over, she gently touched Quinn's arm who was refusing to leave Joe's body.

"Oh my sweet baby..."

She said in a choked voice, before gently reaching over, and brushing Joe's thin hair back. Mr. Hart walked over, before gently touching Quinn's arm as Sam stood in the background. "Quinn honey, I'm so sorry...but this isn't Joe anymore. You have to let them take him away." Quinn continued laying there, eyes snapped shut, still holding onto his cold body. More than anything she wanted for her husband to just open his eyes and look at her. Finally she sat back, and the second she looked at Ms. Hart, her entire face crumpled before she started sobbing, feeling sick to her stomach, she stared at Joe's mother, looking at her own eyes filling with tears, both knowing that Joe was really gone. Ms. Hart wrapped her arms around her, and held her tight. Now two days later the Harts were downstairs making funeral arrangements downstairs. She honestly didn't know what she would do without the two of them, who had been staying with her since the night Joe died. Her mother was coming by later, and almost all of her friends were coming for the funeral tomorrow. She felt as if she was slowly drifting in a dream.

Every few hours suddenly the reality of what happened would come crashing back at her, hitting her like a pile of bricks. It was little things, like knowing his hospital room had an older man staying in it. Mr. Hart bringing home three bags full of his stuff, including his T-shirts and sweats that Nancy had all washed for Quinn, including his plants, books, and framed photos. The second she saw all of these things sitting in the living room, she broke down. Hearing Mr. and Mrs. Hart make the arrangements they could over the phone as well as contacting family. Hearing the same sentence over and over again from the next room...

"Joe passed away on Friday..."

It didn't seem real. To Quinn she kept waiting for her phone to light up, it being Joe, making her smile, and asking when she would be coming by at the hospital? Sometimes she would surprise him with a smoothie, or some fresh fruit from the farmer's market that he loved. She even remembered on his birthday surprising him with a black and gold lace panties and bra that were his favorite. She remembered she wore it underneath a sundress, and as soon as Nancy left after checking his chart, she slowly snapped the buttons open, showing what she had as a surprise for him. The second he saw it, sipping his smoothie, he nearly choked, looking her up and down. Quinn remembered this was before he got worse, and how she had given him a blowjob that afternoon. Once he had finished, both sat in bed together, sharing the smoothie, watching TV where Joe draped his arm around her, kissing the top of her head.

"This hands down has to be one of the best birthdays I've had in a very long time."

Remembering this, Quinn suddenly felt that same tightening in her chest. She sat there, feeling the tears coming, before Sam who hadn't left her side since they first went to the hospital. He had been helping the Harts, and had been looking after her. Seeing her start to breath heavy, he went to her side, and held her as she started feeling sick. Snapping her eyes shut, she moaned, before breaking down completely. Joe's mother was there in an instant, and took over for Sam, hugging her, gently rubbing her back, telling her it was going to be okay. After she calmed down, Ms. Hart brought her upstairs, saying that they were going to go to the funeral home and asked if she wanted to come with them? Quinn swayed, eyes blinking with tears, as she swayed and instantly Ms. Hart put her arm around her.

"Honey, don't you worry. We'll handle everything..."

"I should be there...you two shouldn't have to..."

Ms. Hart shook her head, gently brushing her hair back behind her ears.

"Honey, I'm calling your doctor to come see you. Joe would have wanted us to take care of you and the babies. You're in shock, and I'm not letting anything happen to you. We'll handle all of the arrangements, you need to rest understand?"

Quinn's lip quivered, before she blinked and stared up at him.

"I...just want him back...I want him back too badly...I should have been there."

Quinn moaned, tears rolling down her face. Instantly Ms. Hart shook her head.

"No baby, you were by his side the entire time. I think he hung on as long as he could honey...and I know he fought as hard as he could. He wanted to stay, I know he did. Last time I spoke to her, he was so excited about the babies...but now he's in Heaven honey, he's in Heaven with your little boy. He'll be watching over you."

Quinn bowed her head before she started crying again, bringing her shaken hands up to her face, sobbing. Ms. Hart rubbed her back, soothing her, until finally, Quinn sniffled and looked up.

"He'll need something to wear. His...suit, the black one is in the closet, maybe...the tie he wore on our wedding day? It's in his dresser."

Mrs. Hart warmly smiled, kissing the top of her head as tears continued to pour down her face.

"That sounds perfect baby...absolutely perfect."

Once Quinn calmed down, Mrs. Hart picked out the clothes, before the doorbell rang downstairs. Mrs. Hart left Quinn on the bed, hurrying downstairs, and just a few minutes later, returned with Dr. Weathers. Quinn felt a few panic attack coming on, she laid curled up, holding one of Joe's T-shirts from the hospital, clutching onto it for dear life. Dr. Weather reassured Mrs. Hart she would stay here with her until they came back. Sam would be waiting downstairs. Once they were alone, Mrs. Hart rubbed Quinn's side.

"How are you honey?"

Quinn couldn't believe a fresh batch of tears were being brought on. Struggling to stop, she found herself helpless. Tears continued to gush down her face, as she snuggled to breath, hitching in her breath, as she continued to sob. It seemed as if every few minutes when things weren't numb to the shock, suddenly the grief would rear it's ugly head, clawing at her, making her sick to her stomach, wanting more than anything just to see her husband. She suddenly wished more than anything that she had been more prepared. Instead she had been in complete denial over Joe dying, never thinking this day would ever happen, especially once she found out she was pregnant again. Suddenly everything seemed impossible that this had happened. How was she ever going to have these babies and raise them without Joe? Maybe Rachel had been right? The grief kept hitting her over and over, and she had absolutely no idea how she could live like this when it had just been a few days. All she wanted was her husband back, just a little bit more time... Dr. Weathers gave her something and swore it wouldn't hurt the babies. First she gave her a shot, when sad she would be giving her a bottle of pills that Mrs. Hart could give to her when she felt another panic attack coming on. She also have her something to sleep. She stayed with her, talking a little bit, until finally sleep washed over Quinn. She fell into it exhausted and in it she dreamed...

_She was back at school, in the choir room, and saw Joe alone there. He was a teenager, dressed in jeans and one of his pullover sweaters, his dreads, his nose ring, and that same adorable smile on his face. The second he spotted her, he smiled and waved her over._

_"Hey, I saved you a seat."_

_Panic as well as relief filled her as she hurried over, falling to her knees right in front of him. Seeing him, her heart pounded, and her stomach fluttered. Crying tears of relief, she knew they had made some awful mistake. She knew he was alive. Smiling, she grabbed both of his hands, squeezing them before she laid her head down, rubbing them against her, kissing his fingers._

_"I knew you were alive, I knew you would come back to me! I knew you weren't dead! Don't ever leave again Joe! Promise me! Promise me!"_

_Joe lifted her head, squeezing her hands with his larger ones before smiling._

_"Of course, I'm not going anywhere..._

Then Quinn woke up.

Sam was sitting on the edge of the bed, and downstairs she could faintly here Dr. Weathers talking to the Harts downstairs. Taking a second, she blinked, before it hit her all over again. Crashing down and hitting her. Joe was dead, and that had all been a cruel dream. Staring up at Sam, her eyes exhausted she sighed.

"Did I dream it?"

Sighing, Sam shook his head. Laying there, feeling completely drained, Quinn brought Joe's shirt up to her face, breathing in deep before shutting her eyes and softly crying.

**The next night...**

The funeral was held at St. Ann's, a church both Joe and Quinn joined shortly after getting married. They became close with the pastor and his wife, and attended every Sunday up until Joe was forced to start staying at the hospital full time. The pastor had constantly been visiting Joe in the hospital, as well as having prayer circles after mass, constantly telling Quinn that they were all keeping them in their thoughts, praying to give Joe strength to fight this illness.

Quinn knew it was nearing the end when the Pastor, Pastor Mark to be exact came to visit Joe just four days before he died. Quinn came in as the pastor had his head lowered, praying as Joe slept. When he finished, making the sign of the cross, he turned and smiled at Quinn. Walking over, Quinn kept her voice down so, even though she was sure the pain meds had really knocked Joe out. Hugging him tightly once he got up from his chair. Hugging him tight, Quinn sighed and pulled back, blaming the pregnancy hormones for her tears, she smiled and thanked him for coming. "I hear you have two little one son the way." Quinn blushed smiling, staring down at her stomach which was just staring to take a little shape.

"Yeah, thank you..."

"These babies are a gift from God. You remember that."

Smiling and nodding, she thanked him before he told her to call anytime, that his wife was planning on doing some baking and drop off some pies to her house since she's eating for three now. Smiling, she thanked him, before being left alone to stare down at her husband. Her husband who weighed just a little over a hundred and twelve pounds, looking beyond gaunt from his tall 6'2 frame. His skin was a grayish sickly color, brownish purple circles underneath his closed eyelids. Most days now he was so out of it he mostly slept. When he was somewhat aware she curled up in bed to him, softly singing, stroking his thinning hair, and filling him in on her day. He always wanted to know how she was feeling, hating to dwell on how he was, shrugging it off saying he was fine, and rather talk about her. He would lay there, listening to her, and hanging off every world, his hazel eyes somewhat glossed over from the amount of pain meds he was on. She knew he was on such heavy stuff now even if there was a strange one in a million chance he survived, these drugs would leave him a junkie.

She had looked up the stuff he was on, and basically it was just left for him to either sleep 90% of the day, or just feel numb all over and not feel anything. Still, it was better than when he was violently ill, puking up blood, barley able to breath, sweating, and moaning in pain. She enjoyed their few hours together. She would help give him sponge baths, gently washing him, or helping Nancy and the other nurses change his bedding. He seemed humiliated when he had accidents, barley able to look up at her. As always Quinn would tell him she didn't care, kissing his forehead, and hating how defeated he seemed. She would watch television with him, using cream to rub down his arms, bend his legs giving him exercise in any little way she could. She loved whenever she could get him to laugh a little. He would constantly be touching her stomach, wanting to hear every single detail of her appointments, as well as her day. He wanted to hear about everything, her morning sickness, how tired she was, how Sam was doing, or who she had heard from through text. He was always so happy to hear that his mother was coming by nearly everyday to either bring her meals, or help her around the house. Sitting there she gently rubbed her stomach, staring at Joe, trying to push away the terrifying thought that he was in fact slipping away. The funeral itself had been a small service. Rachel, Jesse, Arnie, Kurt, and Blaine all came in from New York.

Mr. Schuester, Emma, and Coach Sylvester all came together as a group. Coach Sylvester looking odd in a black pants suit. Mercedes had flown in from Los Angeles, with Sugar. Both had shared an Uber from the airport since Sugar was currently "studying" fashion in Los Angeles. Kitty came, but Quinn gave her the cold shoulder. She knew she should have tried to be nicer, but even though it was years ago, she remembered Joe telling her about all of the man remarks she constantly said about him. Santana, and Brittany came together, and the second Santana saw Quinn, dressed in a simple black dress, her eyes began to water and she tightly threw her arms around her, squeezing her tight.

"I'm so sorry Quinn..."

She said, barley able to keep it together. Brittany hugged her tight as well, silent tears rolling down her face as the unholy trinity held onto each other. Rory had sent flowers from Ireland, and an hour after viewing hours had started Wade, Marley, Jake, and Ryder even made it, all attending college across the country, now arriving to pay respects to a guy they went to school with for just a year so long ago. The last time she had seen any of them was at their wedding. Mrs. Hart did all of the arrangements. Quinn, who felt as if she was sleepwalking through all of this was forever thankful. She honestly didn't think she could have done any of this. In fact this morning, her mother had to pick out what she had to wear since after her shower, she simply sat with a towel wrapped around her, blankly staring at a wall. The funeral home was called Anderson's. It was a small little family run place, and they had been absolutely wonderful. When the Harts, Quinn's mom, and Quinn all entered the viewing room, Quinn felt her heart freeze in her chest. The casket was beautiful, and there were countless backseats and displays of flowers sent from all over. Laying in the casket was her husband. They had done a wonderful job. They had combed his hair, making it look thicker than it was. The makeup they used didn't make him look so pale, and he laid in his suit, his hands folded. He actually looked as if he was just sleeping. She couldn't believe it.

They let her go first. Quinn knelt down on the tiny bench covered in red velvet as she slowly knelt down, feeling the meds she had taken earlier really kick in. Staring down at him, she couldn't believe that just a few days ago he was alive. She tried so hard to think of him long before the illness came. Back when he was just this handsome guy, tattoos, nose ring, and dreads. His smile, and the way his eyes always lit up. She thought of all those years ago, him staring down at her during physical therapy, holding onto her legs, smiling, locking eyes with her. She then remembered him holding her leg when she delivered Nash, the same look in his eyes, only this time, heartbroken. She thought of less than a month ago trying to give him a hand job, but he couldn't get hard no matter how much she tried. She knew it was the drugs that were doing that. He was embarrassed, but she reassured him that none of this mattered. It was just the two of them, as always. Now here he was, dead, not even reaching his mid twenties, her once handsome beautiful, strong, kind husband...dead.

She knelt there, gently stroking his sleeve, the overpowering scent of flowers turning her stomach. A few hours later, she simply sat in the back, between Mercedes, and Santana. Everyone was gathered in tiny groups talking around the room, sitting on what appeared to be antique overstuffed chairs, everyone dressed in black, talking, while across the room Joe laid in his casket. Quinn nervously and mindlessly picked at her tissue, too drained to even cry anymore. She was greeted by endless people, friends, family, some people she didn't even know. Puck came by, hugged her but kept his eyes low. When he learned she was pregnant he had called, making a few cruel remarks and Quinn decided it was best to keep him at a distance. She understood he had always been jealous of Joe, and he would always be the father to her daughter, but every once in awhile she truly saw the ugly side of Puck and hated it. More guests came, and suddenly she understood what Rachel must have felt like. Sure they hadn't been together, but losing someone you love so young, it just felt like a crime against life or something. For two hours straight countless people filtered in and all said the same thing, how sorry they were, what an amazing man he was, how he was with the angels, and not suffering. Only a few people knew she was pregnant, and Quinn actually preferred it this way. She hated the pity, or Joe's annoying great aunt carrying on about however was she going to raise two babies alone? Instead she sat back, staring at the casket, wanting more than anything for her husband to just be there sitting beside her. Before the mass, everyone cleared out besides Quinn's mother. and Joe's mom and dad. Quinn sat back with her mother petting her arm watching the Harts cry over Joe's body, gently brushing his hair back and kissing him goodbye.

Finally it was Quinn's turn. They all waited in the lobby, giving her a few minutes alone so she could say goodbye. Everyone else was getting into their cars, to drive to the small mass that was being held, then the cemetery. Alone, Quinn knelt down on the bench, and stared down at him. Taking a deep breath, she bowed her head, her entire body aching as a fresh wave of tears started to build up.

"Why did you have to leave me? You promised you never would..."

She hung her head down, tears building before she took a deep breath and tried to control herself. The last thing she needed was to have a complete breakdown right before the service. Reaching, she gently touched his cheek, hating how cold he felt.

"I really hope there's a Heaven Joe, because if anyone deserves to be there it's you. I hope you're with Nash, and I just hope you know...how bad I miss you. I really do think there's a God...because when I was at my lowest...you walked into my life."

Tears spilling down her cheeks, she sniffled, feeling her chest shake, remembering all those times in Glee club, him sitting beside her, smiling. Reaching into her tiny black purse she had brought, filled with mints to help her if she had any morning sickness, and issues. Taking the one other item out, unfolding it, she stared at it. It was the latest ultrasound printout. She stared down at it, before nodding. Putting it underneath his folded hands, she deeply sighed before slowly getting up, struggling because her knees were shaking. Staring down at him, she knew this would be the last time she would ever see him.

"Goodbye Jospeh Hart. If there isn't such thing as Heaven, I just wanna say...these few years with you...were truly paradise. Look in on me and the babies from time to time. We'll need it."

Leaning down, she shut her eyes, before gently pressing her forehead against his cold one. She knew this would be the very last time. Taking a deep breath, she stood up, looking down at him, before nodding. Sniffling, she turned, knowing if she looked back she wouldn't be able to leave. Afterwards only a small amount of them came back to her house. Sam had helped so much, and the Harts had ordered finger sandwiches. The Harts, her mother, and boyfriend all gathered in the living room, all drinking coffee and talking. In the kitchen, Quinn sat at her kitchen table surrounded by her friends. She had taken something, and just sat there, numb as everyone talked about memories of the Glee club, sadly smiling, and looking back.

"Remember the duet of Saving All My Love that Quinn and Joe performed? I think we all knew back then something was happening."

Mercedes said smiling. Everyone nodded in agreement, before they talked about what a great singer Joe was. They talked about him helping Quinn at physical therapy, and how awesome his tattoos, where, and how they had danced to Stereo Harts at his wedding. Rachel sadly smiled before looking at Quinn.

"I hope him and Finn are together somewhere, rolling their eyes at us all looking back on Glee club."

Blaine sadly smiled and nodded.

"He was truly one of the best..."

Everyone nodded in agreement before Sam raised his beer.

"To Joe."

All of them nodded and raised their drinks. It took Quinn a second, holding up her Diet Coke before she nodded, her eyes bloodshot and raw from crying.

"To Joe." Once they toasted, Kurt and Brittany hugged her, as a silent tear rolled down her face.

**Later that night...**

Shortly before everyone left, Nancy had swung by to pay her respects. She hugged Quinn tightly, before everyone said their goodbyes. Somehow the entire funeral seemed like a blur to her. She was exhausted, and honestly had worn herself out crying. Her mother was coming back in the morning, and the Harts were staying on the pull out couch. Before leaving for the night, Sam handed Quinn Joe's cellphone.

"Nancy told me, right before...Joe died, he recorded a video for you in case something happened. I was going to wait to give this to you, and if you think you can't handle it I'll..."

Quinn snatched the photo staring at him with glassy eyes.

"I'm hurting right now Sam, but let me just hear my husband's voice okay?"

Sam sadly nodded before kissing her forehead.

"I want you to take it easy, and if you need anything...call me okay?"

Quinn nodded.

"Thanks Sam."

Once he left, the Harts cleaned up, before Mrs. Hart gave Quinn her medication for the night.

"You wanna shower?"

Quinn shook her head.

"I'm too tired, I just want to sleep."

"Okay honey, if you need anything you let us know. It's been a hard day, and I think we all want it behind us."

Quinn smiled, tears beginning to build in her eyes again before she kissed Mrs. Hart's cheek.

"Thank you for everything, I've been so useless since I got the call, you guys and Sam have been wonderful..."

Mrs. Hart who looked as if she was beginning to cry herself shook her head and kissed Quinn's cheek.

"We all loved him honey, but your job is taking care of yourself and those babies...we all knew how much Joe wanted them. You rest okay?"

Nodding, Quinn thanked her before Mrs. Hart left her. Changing into one of Joe's shirts and sweats, she grabbed his phone which had been charging, grabbed her earbuds, before laying down, and opening it. Seeing the latest thing saved was a video, she felt her stomach roll seeing Joe sitting up in his hospital bed. Taking a deep breath, she snapped her lights off on her nightstand, before curling up and staring down before pressing play. Joe was sitting in his hospital bed, pale, oxygen on, struggling to take deep breaths, as he spoke. The second she saw him, and heard his voice, the same horrible pain came ripping down around her, causing her to fight back from crying out. She stared down as Joe spoke on the video.

"Hey Quinn, if you're watching this...I guess it finally happened. I know this seems straight out of a movie or something, and you know I'm not one to be dramatic, but...Nancy has helped me film this, and...I hate to say this aloud, but...I think I'm going. I'm in a lot of pain Quinn, and I didn't want to say anything because I know how horrible you would feel, but...it's getting bad. If I'm not knocked out because of these drugs they are pumping me full of, I'm in constant pain. Everything hurts...so much more than I ever thought pain could feel. This is no way to live Quinn. I tried hanging on and fight as hard as I could...but I just can't do it anymore. I'm sorry to leave you with the babies...but Quinn...think, we're having twins. TWINS!"

His entire face lit up and Quinn laughed through tears as he continued talking.

"I'm still in awe over that we were somehow able to make this happen. I wanted a family with you so bad, and I'm so sorry after Nash I got sick. We never really had a chance to...process what happened, and you were always there for me. I have no idea how a guy like me could have gotten so lucky. I still remember all those years ago in physical therapy, asking what we were and you said...something different. You were right, we were something different, something new...something wonderful. I know I don't need to go over all of the good time we had, because...that might take forever, but you know them. I was just some home schooled hippy Christian with tattoos, and weird hair, and you were this beautiful cheerleader that had really beaten the odds. I believe there's a Heaven, and I believe that you are going to be a truly amazing mother. One day you'll have a new husband, hopefully a great man that treats you the way you deserve to be treated. I can see you driving our kids off to college, and Beth visiting, and maybe even a few other kids of your own. I'm sure it's going to get hard, and I'm sure you're going to question everything, and maybe even get angry that I'm not around. Just remember...I'll try to check in on you from time to time. Be patient with the kids, and if they are girls, or we have a girl...teach her to find someone that treats her to way she deserves to be treated. That she can be anything she wants to be. If we have boys, or a boy...tell them the same thing. That they can do anything as long as they are honest, hard working, and respectful. I hope they look like you Quinn, and I hope you have so much fun with them. Trust me, I wish I would be there with you watching them take their first steps, and say their first words...but I'll be there, even if you can't see me I'll be there. I have some files saved on here, I had Nancy record a couple songs I played when my dad brought in my guitar, it was right after we found out you were pregnant. Maybe you can have the babies listen to a few of these...trust me, I would have done anything to actually be there and sing to them..."

Quinn cried even harder before Joe sadly smiled.

"I love you Quinn. If you ever feel lonely, or overwhelmed...just close your eyes and pretend my forehead is pressing against yours. I'll be there, and I'll always love you. Don't ever forget that. I'm sure I'll see you again. I'll be sixteen, you'll be eighteen...and we'll be in the choir room. I'll keep the music ready for you Quinn...I promise."

He sadly smiled, before he nodded, and the video ended. Quinn laid there, breaking down completely before she gently touched the phone screen, snapping her eyes shut, completely devastated.

**Before...**

It was the last day of Glee Club. Tomorrow would be graduation. Today had actually been pretty emotional. The week's assignment had been "Goodbye" underclassmen sung songs to say goodbye to the seniors, and the upperclassmen sung songs to say goodbye to them. There was still a ton to get done, but Quinn had asked Joe to just skip last period and come outside to the football field with her. Together they ventured out while everyone else was on the other side of the building. The seniors were having a cookout, and the rest of the underclassmen were forced to continue with their regular schedules. Joe had asked why she didn't want to hang with the rest of the seniors at the cookout and Quinn simply smiled walking arm in arm with him as they made it to the center of the field. It was a warm clear beautiful May afternoon, and faintly they could hear music playing from the cookout.

"Kurt gave me the idea, he's sneaking off with Blaine to the roof to have a picnic, I thought that was a sweet idea."

Carefully sitting, smoothing out her skirt, she unzipped her bag. Joe laughed as he sat down, as she handed him a can of coke, and took out a can of diet coke. Reaching inside, she took out a whole bag of strawberry twizzler pull n peels, causing Joe to crack up. Ever since they went out on their "second" official date since prom, Quinn had brought him to the movies, where she had gotten twizzlers, and cracked up over how much Joe loved them, devouring nearly the whole bag before even the trailers finished. Now here they were, sitting on the soft green grass, the sun shinning down on them.

"Here's to us."

Quinn said. Joe smirked.

"Us."

They clinked cans, sipping, before Quinn smiled taking a twizzler and put one end in her mouth. Joe looked at her, before laughing once he got what she was trying to do. Putting the other end in his mouth, both laughed as they chomped, getting closer, and closer, before finally their lips met. Laughing, Quinn tasted strawberries as she closed her eyes, gently touching the sides of his face, giggling as they continued to kiss. Once the kiss broke, they pulled apart staring at each other. Color rising in Joe's cheeks as he smirked. Smiling, Quinn sighed staring at him.

"Man, I'm falling really hard for you..."

Joe laughed before he leaned forward, gently pressing his forehead against hers, before smiling. Gently, he took her in his arms, and both laid back against the grass, staring up at the clear blue sky. Both laid there, not caring if anyone saw them. Snuggling in close to him, Quinn laid her head on his chest as she stared up at the sky. Smiling, Quinn absently played with his beaded necklaces, staring up at the sky.

**Before...**

It was just a week before they laid together in the football field. It was Nationals, and as they danced to Dashboard, Joe and Quinn locked eyes, all in sync, dancing to the music as they crossed each other for just a moment before running to their marks. Joe caught her eyes, and smiled. Suddenly Quinn didn't feel so nervous. Suddenly she actually felt they could win this.

After the performance, everyone was exhausted and sweaty. They had all joined their seats in the audience, hating that they had gone first and were now forced to watch all of the other performances, which all looked amazing. Quinn sat next to Joe who reached over and squeezed her hand. Looking up at him, Quinn smiled before the excitement and thrill of everything hit her at once. She leaned over, kissing him straight on the lips, her mouth opening as her tongue went right into his mouth, catching him off guard. Rory and Sugar saw this and grinned, as Joe's eyes widened, as Quinn continued kissing him, before pulling away, highly amused at her boyfriend's stunned expression.

"What was that for?"

He whispered over the loud music.

Quinn gently laughed before leaning in and whispered into his ear...

"Because I actually think we're going to win this, which means I'll win my bet...and I get to see what's underneath all these clothes."

Joe looked stunned as she pulled back before both cracked up. Leaning over, kissing her cheek, Joe continued squeezing her hand as they kept watching the performances.

**Present - Several months later.**

Quinn had wanted to deliver the twins naturally, but Dr. Weathers had insisted she do a C-section. The pregnancy had been tough, and unlike anything like she had experienced before with Beth or Nash. Quinn had struggled with depression following Joe's death, but had grown extremely close to Mrs. Hart durning all of this, who even moved in for a few months following losing Joe. She had grown extremely close to her mother in-law, and both shared the same total feeling of grief after losing Joe. Still, she helped her slowly move on, taking it one day at a time. There came an afternoon that they boxed up most of Joe's clothes, all besides a few T-shirts of his and donated them to Goodwill. This was extremely hard for Quinn, but afterwards Mrs. Hart took her to mass, and Quinn was slowly starting to feel less angry over what happened. She went back to work, and even met Nancy once a month for lunch. She made sure not to shut herself off, and visited with her friends as much as possible. Sam still came over all the time, and she agreed she wanted to keep the house she had lived in with Joe and have her babies here. She was ordered to strict bedrest towards the end, her stomach huge. Each night she would place headphones on her stomach, feeling the babies move and quick inside of her as she played the recorded videos of Joe singing. She missed him so much, and every Saturday Sam would take her to lay fresh flowers on his grave. Mr. Schuester and Emma visited quite a lot, having a baby of their own. Emma had given her tons of baby clothes, and had been wonderful to talk to throughout this all. One evening while Emma was calling her mother who was watching their son, Will sat with Quinn in the kitchen before sighing.

"I never told you this but...I really liked Joe. He was extremely talented, and I feel sorry I never paid enough attention to him when he was in Glee. He was the heart and soul of that club and cared about everyone. When he quit I should have tried harder to get him back..."

Quinn who was gently rubbing her stomach sighed and shook her head.

"Will don't..."

Will shook his head, tears of his own building.

"No it's true. I should have treated everyone equal. I'm sorry. He loved you so much, and I'm sure these babies are going to take after their parents, kind, and...wonderful singers."

Quinn laughed with Will through tears before smiling down at her stomach.

"Let's hope."

Will then smiled.

"May I?"

Nodding, Quinn let him place his hand on her stomach as the babies kicked like crazy. Smiling, Will nodded.

Now less than a month later, Quinn laid on the delivery table, listening to beeping, a hairnet on, her face pale, silently praying everything would be okay. She honestly didn't know if she could live with herself if something happened to them after all of this. When it came down to it, she decided she couldn't chose between her mother and Mrs. Hart, so instead she asked in Nancy could be in there with her. The entire time, she held her hand, gently humming, putting her at ease. Quinn was numb from the waist down, felt pressure and tugging, as well as feeling cold. Nervously staring up, suddenly she heard the sweet sound of crying.

"It's a boy!"

Quinn's eyes widened, staring at Nancy.

"A boy?"

Nancy smiled from ear to ear.

"A boy! Oh honey he's beautiful!"

Quinn strained her neck, staring up as Dr. Weathers cut the cord as the squirming healthy baby laid in her gloved hands. Staring, Quinn couldn't believe it. He was absolutely perfect.

"Hold on honey, we'll clean him up and bring him over, let's get baby number two out."

Quinn laid back, and focused on breathing as Nancy continued squeezing her hand.

"He's gorgeous honey, you're doing great."

Quinn laid back, nervous and on edge before the same tugging came. Laying there, she silently prayed that Joe was there and could see.

Then...the same sound, crying from a healthy live baby.

Crying out in relief, Quinn gasped before Dr. Weathers smiled lifting the second baby, in her gloved hands, a cord still attached, it's body curled up as it cried, flushed with color.

"Another boy!"

Quinn laughed amazed.

"Another boy?!"

Nancy laughed.

"Quinn, they are so handsome! You did so good!"

Quinn laid back as Dr. Weathers continued working on her, as Quinn turned towards Nancy smiling.

"Boys? I have two boys?"

Nancy laughed, petting her hand.

"You did so good honey!"

Then, the nurse brought over both babies. Carefully, both her and Nancy laid both cleaned up babies, wrapped up in blankets and blue caps against her chest..

Quinn laid there amazed, feeling the warmth of both babies, remembering how absolutely amazing this felt when she had Beth. Staring at them, she couldn't believe they were finally here. One afternoon in a hospital bed resulted in these two beautiful perfect boys. Overwhelmed, Quinn stared down amazed before tears filled her eyes.

"Oh my goodness...look at you two!"

She stared at them, both no longer crying, their wrinkled little faces staring up at her both looking exhausted. Laughing, she stared at them, and couldn't believe this was them. Part her, part Joe. Staring at them, she thanked God that both had been born with air in their lungs, and healthy. She had two beautiful healthy baby boys...sons. Laughing, she stared down at them amazed, knowing the only thing missing was Joe being here. It was a bittersweet feeling, but nevertheless here they were, the babies she knew Joe wanted so badly.

"Harlan Jospeh...and Marshall Jospeh..."

Nancy smiled staring down.

"Those are beautiful names honey...perfect."

Smiling, Quinn continued staring down at her babies.

"Yeah they are aren't they?"

Smiling, she continued laying there looking at her two beautiful baby boys.

**Present - Eighteen years later**

"Mom!"

Quinn heard as she was double checking everything on the list. The car had been packed, and now she was just making sure they didn't forget anything. At forty-four, Quinn looked absolutely stunning. Her skin was still clear, with just a little bit of aging around her eyes. She still looked as if she was in her early to mid thirties, and constantly took care of herself. Her hair was cut short into a bob, and today she wore jeans and a blouse. Today was the day she knew was coming yet dreaded. Sighing, she stared down at the list before JJ came in, her fourteen year old daughter. JJ had been conceived via insemination. Joe had donated some of his sperm at a local clinic right before they officially started trying. Lucky for them, they had conceived the natural way, but when the boys were almost five, Quinn decided she wanted one more baby. It was right around that time she had started dating for the first time since Joe died. It took a lot of convincing, but she was pushed into it by Brittany and Santana who told her it wasn't cheating on Joe, or forgetting him if she started dating again. They swore if it was the other way around, they would totally push Joe into dating again. So Quinn agreed, and this time around they fixed her up with Ryder, a past member of the Glee club who actually knew Joe. He had moved to Texas durning his senior year, but returned just a few years before hand, now coaching football at another high school. The two hit it off, and Ryder absolutely adored Harlan and Marshall. She knew it was okay when Mrs. Hart, who had been such a big help raising the boys told her that's what her and her husband wanted.

"The boys deserve a man in their lives, it's what Joe would have wanted. Trust me, you're not forgetting him...it's just a different sort of love."

Finally, Quinn allowed herself to let go, and start seeing Ryder. He made her laugh, spoiled the boys, and really made her feel great about herself. The first time they had sex, Quinn was amazed that it actually felt great. When Ryder finally proposed, she visited Joe's grave, sighing before telling him nobody could ever replace him. Kissing her fingertips, she touched the stone, sighing at Joe's name and those two dates, truly displaying what a brief life he really did live. Her wedding was at town hall, with just a few friends and family. Ryder moved in, and the moons were over the moon. It was right around then they found out that Ryder was sterile.

It was here that they sat down, and Ryder agreed she should use Joe's sperm sample from the clinic. That way the boys and their sibling would be fully related. No matter what, Quinn knew he would love this baby as much as he loved the boys. So, he went with her one day at the clinic, her legs up, as she took deep breath, holding her new husband's hand, praying silently that this pregnancy would take. Two months later, she took a pregnancy test, and it was positive. Seven months later, she gave birth to a healthy baby girl. Josephine Joseph. The name had been Ryder's idea. Instantly, she became daddy's little girl as Ryder fell absolutely in love with her. The boys adored her, constantly sneaking into the nursery to spy on her sleeping in her crib. The next years flew by. Ryder was a great husband, and a wonderful father. Sam was their godfather, and three time a year all of them would get together, now getting married, and starting families of their own. Everyone agreed that Quinn's children were absolutely adorable, and all three of them looked just like Joe. Harlan and Marshall were identical, they grew tall, and the only thing they got from Quinn were their blond hair, the rest was 100% Joe. They had hazel eyes, and the same exact face with high cheekbones as their father. Harlan was great at spots, and played soccer, all throughout school. Marshall was a movie geek, filming little movies with his brother, little sister, and kids around their age in the neighborhood. He loved having sleepovers downstairs in the living room watching movies, and talking film about everything. He joined AV club at school, and both boys were polite, likable, funny, and filled the house with constant noise. The Harts were still a huge part of all three of her children's lives, constantly around to babysit, or come visit for holidays, birthdays, or school events.

They loved to spoil the kids, and always remarked what a truly amazing job Quinn was doing raising them. JJ was a spunky young girl who actually got her father's dark hair. She was absolutely gorgeous, and very active. She loved animals, and begged Ryder and her to get her a kitten which they surprised her with on her tenth birthday. She was close with her brothers who were protective of her, and one of her favorite things was going shopping with her mother. She was the one who loved the artists. She took countless art classes, as well as joining Uncle Sam's Glee Club. She had found a framed photo in the attic of Joe and Quinn after they won nationals and swore someday her Glee club would make it too nationals. She was fascinated with her late father, having watched the videos of him playing music, and was even given his guitar from the Harts and had begun learning how to play. The boys had been curious about their father, knowing he had met their mother in school, and had died before they were born from cancer. Just this summer, both had come home shocking Quinn by showing they got matching crosses like Joe had tattooed on him both on their chests. As much as Quinn wanted to raise Hell over them getting tattooed, Ryder had calmed her down, saying they were just paying tribute to their father. Now both were off to college. They were going to state. Harlan on a sports scholarship, Marshall studying film. It seemed so unreal that both boys were leaving the house and off to school all ready. It honestly just seemed like yesterday that both were wearing overalls giggling as they took their first steps in front of Quinn in the kitchen. She knew this had been coming, yet was struggling with the idea that they wouldn't be around all the time anymore. Ryder had been wonderful, and even had helped the boys pack up the truck. Feeling her emotions get the best of her, she sighed before turning, facing her beautiful daughter.

"I can't find my blowdryer! Can I borrow yours?"

Smiling, she nodded.

"It's under my sink, remember to put it back honey."

"Thanks mamma!"

JJ planted a wet kiss on her cheek, before stomping back up the stairs. Laughing, she continued looking over the list when Marhsall and Harlan both walked in. Both looking so much like Joe it was actually scary. Harlan wore jeans and a white T-shirt, while Marshall more a jersey and shorts.

"Mom, dad said we gotta go in twenty if we're gonna beat the traffic."

Upstairs they could faintly hear JJ using the blowdryer. Nodding, Quinn looked over the list before nodding and looking across at them as she leaned against the tiny kitchen island. Staring at these two young men, ready for college, she honestly couldn't believe it. She wondered faintly how Joe would be reacting over their sons ready to go off to college.

The thought of this happening to JJ in a few years absolutely terrified her. The blanket that Nancy and Joe had knitted for the boys was in fact shared by the two boys. First it started off in their shared crib, then they took turns having it. Also like a stuffed toy, they took turns having it in their bed. When JJ was born they let her have the blanket, which was still sitting on the end of her bed. Something she loved wrapping around her whenever she was sick with the flu.

She had loved her children, and as hard as it had been, her friends, family, and Ryder had been there for her, making the best out of everything as she had so much fun raising them. She remembered just a week after the boys had been born, laying in her bed she once shared with Joe, staring down at her two baby boys in complete amazement and wonder. They were absolutely perfect. She remembered, propped up on her elbow, staring at both babies sleeping soundly. Now here they were. Taking a deep breath, Quinn smiled.

"You guys ready?"

Marshall and Harlan exchanged a look, speaking in their twin language without even saying so much as a word, something they had been doing for years. Catching that look, Quinn smirked. "What?" Harlan cleared his throat. "While me and Marshall were in the attic getting our bags this weekend, we found something and wanted it give it to you. We just wanted to say thanks for being such an awesome mom." Quinn raised an eyebrow slightly confused.

"What?"

Marshall sighed. "Beth gave us the idea when we video chatted with her after we showed her what we found. We know dad died before we were born, and we're sure that was really hard for you...but you have us an awesome childhood, and we wanted to say thank you." Handing over a small gift bag, they slid it across the island towards Quinn. Raising an eyebrow, Quinn laughed.

"What's this?"

She dug into the bag, before taking out a framed photograph. It was taken at Joe's graduation. Joe smiling in his red cap and down, holding onto a laughing Quinn, showing off her engagement ring. Remembering that day, she stared down at her first husband, the man she still found herself missing nearly twenty years later. The man who gave her three beautiful children, who had seen the real her, and got her walking again. The same man who was so pure and sweet, showing her that she was much stronger than she thought. Staring at it, she smiled down at it before looking up at her boys.

"Do you like it ma?" Marshall asked nervously Smiling, Quinn placed the framed photograph down before circling around and putting her arms around both of her very tall sons.

Bringing them in, she laughed as she hugged them tight, knowing even though she could see him...Joe was here with them at this very moment. Standing on her tiptoes, she kissed her sons, and hugged them tight while silently thanking Joe for giving her these wonderful children. For that, she would be forever grateful. Pulling back, she stared at them.

"If your father was alive, he would be extremely proud of you two. I remember after losing him when I was still pregnant with you two, I had such a hard time. But sometimes I would listen to those videos of him singing, and list of 100 memories or things I loved about him. It took my mind off things and had me focus on how lucky I was to have the few years I did with him. Now...if I had to do that, the 100th memory and best thing to remember him by would be you guys and your sister. I'll forever me grateful for that."

Smiling, the boys stared down at her, and looking up at them she saw her first husband in them. Here she knew Joe would never truly be gone. With them and their sister, he would live on.

**The End. **

_"I'll remember" - Glee soundtrack season 3._ So what did you guys think? I always felt they missed such a great chance for Joe and Quinn being a great power couple. Fingers crossed they end up together if we ever get a reunion movie or special! Thanks for reading!


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